Poll: One of your immediate family memebers is in prison, do you go visit them?

Jan 27, 2011
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Depends what it's for, to be honest.

I draw the line at rape and murder. At that point, I'm probably going to be too disgusted to go visit.
 

MeatMachine

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May 31, 2011
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Under very few circumstances would I say yes, only to amend it with "...but it depends on what they are accused of doing."

I have plenty of family members that I can't stand and do not like as personalities, but I don't expect there's much they can do wherein I would disown them. Going out of your way to disassociate yourself from them is what I would consider "disowning".

I voted yes, I would visit them.
 

TallanKhan

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Aug 13, 2009
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It would depend on what they had done to end up in prison, and why they had done it. My reasons for visiting might vary too.

Regarding what they did, my view is that the law in most countries has been so debased and has become so detached from any coherent moral framework that it is utterly impossible for a rational person to make a blanket judgement about people who break it. I don't draw a definitive dividing line, and there are some people I would visit regardless of what they did, even if only to try to understand better what lead them to that point.

Regarding why, their reasoning would probably be the most important factor to me. I wouldn't argue that the right reason would justify someone's crime, but it might make it understandable. I firmly believe we are all capable of doing morally questionable, or even outright heinous things under the right circumstances and if someone I cared about committed an awful crime but I could understand or even sympathise it would be a factor.

For example, someone you care for commits a murder, unquestionably wrong, but imagine two different scenarios. In Scenario A the individual in question becomes obsessed with an acquaintance, abducts and murders them just for the pleasure of ending their life. In Scenario B they believe someone is going to attempt to kill them or someone they love, they go to the police who don't take them seriously, so they decide to strike first, wait outside their house and shoot them when they leave for work. Both scenarios are cold-blooded, premeditated murder, but, if that were your loved one could you honestly say you wouldn't feel differently depending on which it was?
 

the_dramatica

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My family history is a little rough but not bad enough that they'd be dead to me if they committed a crime.

I'd assume there was at least a semblance of rationale to their crime, and i'd probably respect it if it was something like assault or corporate espionage.
 

Xerosch

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I picked 'Depends'. If someone's in for rape or murder I'd definetely distance myself. If it's something else like theft, fraud or something in this cathegory I think I would like to voice my disappointment. I don't think it's fair to let the criminal wait until their jail time is done and start making accusations only afterwards.
 

Kae

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I don't. not because of the crime or anything judgemental, we're just not very close so there's no reason for me to go visit, besides most of them hate me, which is fine.
 

Tsun Tzu

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Depends on the crime.

Multiple (crime of passion not withstanding for a singular case) homicides, rape, etc. All the biggies.

Theft? I'd visit.

Killing that could be...justified? I dunno, murdering a murderer or something? I'd probably still visit.

I love my clan. I really do. But I can't even imagine any of my immediate family doing something like that to begin with.

It's fun because if I did any of the aforementioned things? I wouldn't want them to visit me either.
 

Secondhand Revenant

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Yeah I'd visit immediate family in such a situation. It doesn't mean I support what they did necessarily but they've been in my life enough I owe them support for making it through that. Plus I don't want to cut any of them from my life.
 

shintakie10

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aegix drakan said:
Depends what it's for, to be honest.

I draw the line at rape and murder. At that point, I'm probably going to be too disgusted to go visit.
Does it have to actually be tried or convicted or do they simply need to be accused of rape?

On top of that, how absolutely certain do you need to be that they did it before you don't visit?

My grandfather was accused of sexual assault and spent several days in prison. It was complete and utter bullshit. He was a 70 year old man that some 8 year old said groped her. When pressed she said it was some "old brown looking person" and they accused my grandfather. Facts be damned, like the fact that he was on the opposite side of a fence almost 20 feet away from the kid at the time and couldn't have possibly hopped the fence, groped her, then hopped back over without anyone noticing an amazingly athletic 70 year old latino man running everywhere. He signed a confession after the weekend saying he did it and was placed on a sex offenders list, but was able to avoid jail time (outside of the weekend they left him in prison).

Obviously the cops didn't even believe this shit was real, but they had a generic brown person in custody and some little white kid and her parents said he did it, so lets blame the first brown person and get this shit done!

Even if he had been convicted I would have visited him regularly, if only so I wouldnt go out and verbally smack the fuck out of those assholes who falsely accused my grandfather simply because he was the nearest brown man to accuse.

Really, no matter what I'd visit at least once. Get their side of the story at the very least, then go from there. Unless it was 100% apparent that they had committed an incredibly heinous crime I'd visit them. I mean fucked up shit too. Like they got caught burying cats up to their head and running over them with a lawnmower fucked up.
 
Oct 2, 2012
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Nope. A lot of my immediate family members have been to prison many times. I never once visited any of them.
I preferred to stay in school or hang out with my friends and family members that weren't stupid enough to get thrown in prison. I got better shit to do for myself than worry about the idiots in my family.
 

lacktheknack

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Of course not. I'm having a bad enough time already. Why on Earth would I make it actively worse by abandoning family?
 

kris40k

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Depends on what their in for.

Raping and murdering everyone in an elementary school bus? Yeah, they can burn for all I care.

Possession of weed or other minor crime? Sure thing.

Just a side not to keep in mind: people's lives are being destroyed by the "war on drugs" in most of America with people being sent away for weed possession for years, and I can run down to the dispensary just as easy as making a run to the convenience store (if they carded everyone that walked in) here in Washington state and buy weed any day of the week, and smoke it in the comfort of my home.

And our state hasn't descended into drug-fulled anarchy yet.

Huh, funny thing, that.
 

Eclipse Dragon

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I have only one family member who spent a significant amount of time in jail and they were dead to me the moment they got in, so by default, I must say no, however if they're in jail for something like possessing pot in a non-marijuana state, I'd probably visit. I'm in the "depends on the crime and/or person" camp.
 
Jan 27, 2011
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shintakie10 said:
aegix drakan said:
Depends what it's for, to be honest.

I draw the line at rape and murder. At that point, I'm probably going to be too disgusted to go visit.
Does it have to actually be tried or convicted or do they simply need to be accused of rape?

On top of that, how absolutely certain do you need to be that they did it before you don't visit?
They'd need to be convicted and I'd need to be convinced beyond a reasonable doubt. False accusations happen and I wouldn't pre-judge until it's proven or disproven.

If it was a bullshit charge like happened to your grandpa, hell yes I'd visit, not to mention make a fuss about the situation. I mean, dear GOD criminal injustice pisses me off more than anything. x_X