Poll: The Coolest/Deadliest Warrior

[tehbeard]

Spoiler: image of gun

FUCK YOUR SWORDS

Spetsnaz.
The only armed force I know of that uses these beauties.

 

[Alex_P]

Style: The Samurai.

I love me some bushi. I hate the fanfiction that passes for fact about bushi/samurai, though. To whit...

born the a society where killing was an art

Unlike the rest of the world? All societies with an elite warrior class make a huge deal out of combat training and technique. I'll give historical bushi massive style points for death poems, but it's important to remember that a lot of our tropes about samurai come from shit that samurai did after they no longer had any real battles to fight -- the pointless wannabe wanking of an idle elite in its decadent sunset, not the exploits of real soldiers.

a samurai know war in all it's forms

Except, you know, truly heavy armor or pretty much any kind of hand-held shield. Those are some pretty big oversights.

the The katana both light and fast, could cleave through 3 people in less than a tenth of a second

Yeah, great numbers someone made up. Or maybe they came out of watching a video of a dude cutting up tatami mats -- real combat doesn't involve some naked guys lining up next to each other to be cut down, though
You don't quite "cleave" with a katana or tachi, anyway, in the sense of hewing into something straight-on. The technique is closer to what's called a "draw cut", using a lateral motion of the blade across the surface being cut to slice into it rather than relying on the energy of the swing to chisel through it.

yet was strong enough to survive hits with much heavier weapons due to it's ability to bend slightly.

Japanese blades aren't uniquely more durable than other weaponry. Hard impacts tend to warp or notch the blade. Japanese martial arts explicitly teach you to whack the back of an opponent's sword if you're trying to damage it. Folks love to wax poetic about the fine craftsmanship while totally ignoring the painstaking maintenance that was lavished on quality nihonto -- the swords don't actually stay awesome all by themselves, you guys.

And should the enemy be armored with plate- or chain-mail, the katana could be used to pierce as well.

Just being able to thrust is insufficient. Effectively fighting an opponent in full harness pretty much demands a purpose-built sword. Nihonto were never designed for this purpose. Longsword techniques against plate generally revolve around half-swording to increase how much force you can put into your strike; that's not the kind of thing you can do with a katana.

-- Alex

 

[Dyp100]

I don't think we should include anything in modern/sci-fi terms.(Because we all know SPESS MARINES would win.)

But, IMO, Spartans and Knights are the coolest, I just love to watch European fighting, and Spartans were raised from age 0 to kick your ass.

That is right, YOUR ASS. -Epic point-

 

[CheesusCrust]

He who lives by the sword,
Gets shot by he who does not

 

[CincoDeMayo]

I'm a sucker for feudal samurai's. Ninjas weren't on the list, but they get an honorary mention as well.

Pirates are kickass too.

 

[RanD00M]

I voted Viking's, because one Viking held off the English army at Stamford Bridge. He just stood there with his axe and fucked up anyone who came near, allowing his army to proceed unimpeded. In fact, they only killed him by boating underneath the bridge and stabbing him with a spear in the nads.

It was actually a sword if I remember correctly.But it's been some time since I read that story.

OT:Vikings.The biggest and best brutes of all time.Seriously,they went into Rome.Raped,murdered and pillaged for some two days.And then they just left.

 

[Angerwing]

I voted Viking's, because one Viking held off the English army at Stamford Bridge. He just stood there with his axe and fucked up anyone who came near, allowing his army to proceed unimpeded. In fact, they only killed him by boating underneath the bridge and stabbing him with a spear in the nads.

It was actually a sword if I remember correctly.But it's been some time since I read that story.

OT:Vikings.The biggest and best brutes of all time.Seriously,they went into Rome.Raped,murdered and pillaged for some two days.And then they just left.

That could be. I was just going off the stereotype that Vikings=Axes.

 

[MattZero]

I voted Viking on this. They are the only ones who really made being a warrior and all around bad-ass the entire focus of their culture. Before anyone can quote me and say oh but Sparta... NO... in Viking culture you had to be killed in battle to get your eternal reward anything else and you went to hel. The only way to go to Valhalla as a Viking was to get cut down by someone who was more of a bad-ass than you.

Plus as far as the choices on the list go they are the only ones who put forth the effort to be fucking terrifying what with the murder/rape/pillage trifecta that had the entire coast of Europe shitting themselves every time a longboat was seen on the horizon.

 

[KAPTAINmORGANnWo4life]

Most bad-ass? The Scottish demons who fought the Roman Empire, and won


Most deadly? Well, the one who carries the world's first weapon of mass destruction as a standard. Well, sometimes.

 

[Death_Korps_Kommissar]

A mongol.

Who wouldn't want to be part of the single most powerful empire of it's era?
Fine soldiers lead by possibly the greatest general who ever lived.

 

[Hotshots]

Viking is sheer badassness,but Modern soldiers because they have, wait for it...GUNS!

 

[Shock and Awe]

FUCK YOUR SWORDS

You're the kind of person that chooses "Nuke" in a game of "Rock, Paper, Scissors" aren't you?

Play to win.

 

[Tharwen]

I voted Samurai, because this isn't 'who would win in a direct battle'. A Samurai would find a way into the modern soldier's camp and kill them all from up close with a surprise attack where their guns and reaction speeds are effectively useless. Also, the other warriors on your poll are trained to be part of a large group, meaning that, individually, a Samurai is teh winzorr.

 

[Canadamus Prime]

Spoiler

FUCK YOUR SWORDS

Guns are fucking coward's weapons as far as warriors are concerned, if you ask me. A real warrior has the balls to meet his enemy face to face and look him in the eye before killing him; using either bare hands or a melee weapon. Anything else is for cowards and weaklings.
/my opinion

Strange how everyone bitches when someone knifes in MW2 then.

Why? I don't play MW2, but I imagine only real skilled players can run up to an opponent who's gleefully spraying bullets around and stab him to death. Feel free to correct me if I'm wrong.

That's a very idealistic view on things. You think modern soldiers are cowards and weaklings? They have to face enemies using weapons that can kill them from a distance in a split second. That takes an enormous amount of balls in my opinion. Much less cowardly than a man who sit on his warhorse with enough armour plating to disable him if he falls off his horse, slashing through footmen who can't even touch him.

Using a bow was never considered cowardice, in fact it was heavily encouraged for peasants to take archery lessons. Oh wait, no, it was the law. This is also in one of the most chivalry centric cultures the world has ever seen.

You use what works. Fighting otherwise is sheer idiocy. Even the damn honour-obsessed samurai used bows.

Yes I know, I'm an idealist. And no, I don't mean to say modern soldiers are cowards etc., I mean they can only work with what they are given and trained for right? I just think the methods are... well maybe "cowardly" and "weak" are the wrong choice of words; it just doesn't seem very warrior-like to me to pick off your enemy from 50+ yards away.

And how much balls does it take to let your mouth shoot off when you're posting on a forum instead of being shot at by iraqi insurgents .. ?

That was just my opinion. Also see above.

well, you have to consider that the enemy too has guns, so you need balls of steel to peek around a corner and shoot the bastards.

All right all right, point taken. I'm still not a fan of guns or modern warfare though. If fact, I'm not a fan of warfare period.

 

[Prometherion]

After playing the splinter cell series to death i have come to my own conclusion.

Nerds for a hackin',

Scientists for a plague'n


Besides i was always more concerned of the gun turrets and thermal cameras in Splinter Cell than the guards for some reason...

 

[Alex_P]

OT:Vikings.The biggest and best brutes of all time.Seriously,they went into Rome.Raped,murdered and pillaged for some two days.And then they just left.

That wasn't Vikings, unless you mean the Normans in the 11th century (whose sack of Rome was the result of a Pope calling for aid against the Holy Roman Emperor), which is hardly the work of what we think of as full-on Vikings and, being a case of shitting on a city that had been shat on relentlessly for six centuries before that and then having to run away when the people rose up against you, hardly a proud military achievement.

-- Alex

 

[The Heik]

Style: The Samurai.

I love me some bushi. I hate the fanfiction that passes for fact about bushi/samurai, though. To whit...

born the a society where killing was an art

Unlike the rest of the world? All societies with an elite warrior class make a huge deal out of combat training and technique. I'll give historical bushi massive style points for death poems, but it's important to remember that a lot of our tropes about samurai come from shit that samurai did after they no longer had any real battles to fight -- the pointless wannabe wanking of an idle elite in its decadent sunset, not the exploits of real soldiers.

Well considering that ALL that a samurai did was either train for war or be in war until they retired, I would consider them a bit more into it than other societies. To a samurai, war was everything. Hell, they thought that dying in battle was the ultimate glory. They just don't know how to fight, they hunger for it. I know that other societies had their own battle-crazed baddies, but none had the crazy single-mindedness that a samurai had in battle.

a samurai know war in all it's forms

Except, you know, truly heavy armor or pretty much any kind of hand-held shield. Those are some pretty big oversights.

I'll give you this, but the samurai never had to go up against heavy armor, as their entire society valued speed over protection due to the "glory in death" thought patterns. I personally argee on the speed, as the heavier the armor, the harder it is to move around in it. Dressed up in full plate mail will weight upwards of eighty pounds, not including any weaponry you might want to carry. I don't know about you, but battling for more than ten minutes in that kind of gear would leave me completely exhausted, and I'm pretty fit.

the The katana both light and fast, could cleave through 3 people in less than a tenth of a second

Yeah, great numbers someone made up. Or maybe they came out of watching a video of a dude cutting up tatami mats -- real combat doesn't involve some naked guys lining up next to each other to be cut down, though
You don't quite "cleave" with a katana or tachi, anyway, in the sense of hewing into something straight-on. The technique is closer to what's called a "draw cut", using a lateral motion of the blade across the surface being cut to slice into it rather than relying on the energy of the swing to chisel through it.

Figure of speech dude. I know that a katana doesn't cleave, but the way it can slice through an enemy, it certainly looks like it does. Considering it's weight, that blade can be whipped around at some pretty ridiculous speeds. Heck, there's an entire battle style built around getting the first swing in faster. Oh, and it ain't tatami mats. I saw the guy go through 3 pigs, which means that it has to go through the spinal column, and bone is a whole lot tougher than the leather armor that most troops wore.

yet was strong enough to survive hits with much heavier weapons due to it's ability to bend slightly.

Japanese blades aren't uniquely more durable than other weaponry. Hard impacts tend to warp or notch the blade. Japanese martial arts explicitly teach you to whack the back of an opponent's sword if you're trying to damage it. Folks love to wax poetic about the fine craftsmanship while totally ignoring the painstaking maintenance that was lavished on quality nihonto -- the swords don't actually stay awesome all by themselves, you guys.

Oh I know that maintenance is a big issue, though the samurai did consider the blade their life, And considering how long it took for a blade to be built in Japan (up to TWO MONTHS!), weapon quality was pretty much paramount. Also, no swordsman in any society would let the actual blade edge to be hit against a weapon. standard practice would be to catch and deflect along the side of the blade, so the full force doesn't get transferred into the blade.

And should the enemy be armored with plate- or chain-mail, the katana could be used to pierce as well.

Just being able to thrust is insufficient. Effectively fighting an opponent in full harness pretty much demands a purpose-built sword. Nihonto were never designed for this purpose. Longsword techniques against plate generally revolve around half-swording to increase how much force you can put into your strike; that's not the kind of thing you can do with a katana.

The katana wasn't designed to pierce, but it certainly was capable of it. As the samurai is usually lighter armored than a knight, he'll aim for the chinks in the plate to bring his target down. Even a knight with full armor will have chinks, and though chainmail can be used to cover those hole in the defense, it is only designed against slices, so [strong]any[/strong] weapon that's stabbing towards that ***** can cause damage. All you need is a single well placed stab to bring the knight down to the ground, and by then it's too late for him.


*aside* man we really picked apart each other's arguments, didn't we?

 

[Daemascus]

Deadliest would be modren soilder. Coolest is defintely the Spartan. It doesnt get much more bad ass than holding off a quarter million persians with 300 troops.

 

[Alex_P]

Well considering that ALL that a samurai did was either train for war or be in war until they retired, I would consider them a bit more into it than other societies. To a samurai, war was everything. Hell, they thought that dying in battle was the ultimate glory. They just don't know how to fight, they hunger for it. I know that other societies had their own battle-crazed baddies, but none had the crazy single-mindedness that a samurai had in battle.

Historical bushi also wrote poems, managed estates, studied religion, and engaged in petty political bickering. Remember that these people were deeply involved in governing as well as warfare. So much of the popular-culture conception of how and why bushi fought is terribly tainted by the masturbatory fantasies of samurai who only ever dueled.

I'll give you this, but the samurai never had to go up against heavy armor, as their entire society valued speed over protection due to the "glory in death" thought patterns. I personally argee on the speed, as the heavier the armor, the harder it is to move around in it. Dressed up in full plate mail will weight upwards of eighty pounds, not including any weaponry you might want to carry. I don't know about you, but battling for more than ten minutes in that kind of gear would leave me completely exhausted, and I'm pretty fit.

O-yoroi armor weighs something like 60 pounds -- that's what bushi used up through, like, the Genpei War. Some modern soldiers' gear probably weighs more than something like Maximilian armor, and it's not nearly as well-distributed across the body.

Heck, there's an entire battle style built around getting the first swing in faster.

... Mostly developed after the samurai stopped fighting wars. It's true that being able to strike during the draw was the whole reason the katana eventually supplanted the tachi, but you're describing something that occupied the same time-period as Gothic armor and pollaxes, post-dating most of Japan's big historical conflicts other than the Sengoku period.

The katana wasn't designed to pierce, but it certainly was capable of it. As the samurai is usually lighter armored than a knight, he'll aim for the chinks in the plate to bring his target down. Even a knight with full armor will have chinks, and though chainmail can be used to cover those hole in the defense, it is only designed against slices, so [strong]any[/strong] weapon that's stabbing towards that ***** can cause damage. All you need is a single well placed stab to bring the knight down to the ground, and by then it's too late for him.

And you can kill a man in full harness with nothing but a stiletto, too. Good luck, though -- there's a reason European martial arts techniques often involved bringing the man down to the ground first and then trying to find a vulnerable spot in his armor. Furthermore, the ideal sword tip for this is more like an awl than a flat razor with a point. Even as swords go, nihonto really aren't the best tool for this job -- unsurprising since it was never their purpose in the first place.

-- Alex