Poll: Would you rather be single than date an unattractive person?

ohgodalex

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May 21, 2009
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uh, if i don't believe that someone is attractive, i am not attracted to them, so i do not date them.
from your attitude, i am hypothesizing that you don't go on a whole lot of dates.
 

Yopaz

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Jun 3, 2009
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If we're talking about someone who is ugly then probably not. If we're talking about someone who's OK, but I simply feel no attraction to physically but we share interests and got a nice personality sure. I am not going to date an orc, but rather that than a supermodel I got nothing in common with. There's actually quite a few I've been attracted to only after I got to know them.
 

Zantos

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Jan 5, 2011
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At the end of the day if it's an issue for you then no one can tell you otherwise. Only you know if someone's right for you. I have been told I need to raise my standards though.
 

Axyun

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Oct 31, 2011
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RagTagBand said:
Liking someone's personality but having no physical attraction to them is also commonly known as "platonic friendship". Pretty much the only demonstrable difference between a girl friend and a girlfriend (or boy, whichever) is mutual sexual attraction.

Having a relationship with someone who you have no lust for is pointless, you may as well just be friends for all the difference it makes.

Would I date someone who I don't find attractive but who has a great personality? No, not at all, not even for a moment. Would I be friends with them? Hell yes. I already have a good number of these friends, some are male (i'm a straight male) and some are female who I am not attracted to (which is not to say they are unattractive)

Would I date someone who other people don't find attractive? Of course, In my eyes (the only eyes that matter), they're wrong.
I think this pretty much nails it. Well said.
 

Sutter Cane

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Jun 27, 2010
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Well for me attraction often develops from their personality. after a while of knowing someone for a while i start to notice features that i find attractive that i would have not considered before if I really like them
 

DoomyMcDoom

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Jul 4, 2008
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Considering how attraction works for me, I chose maybe, after all a person's physical attractiveness never really... appears to draw me untill I see the spark of personality through it... a woman can be eye candy to the extent of rating it 11/10 but if she has the personality of a dead fish... then the spell is broken, and I can't help but see her personality through the layers of outer beauty...

It's like seeing a really nice crystal sculpture, then someone fills it with puke, the whole thing is ruined...

not saying that looks are completely unimportant, certain things appeal to me, as certain things appeal to others, and if a woman does not fall into the categorical range of things my Biochemistry finds appealing, then I'm unlikely to be drawn to her in that way in the first place, but that's just it, my own personal idea of beauty, in itself is different from another man's, and his would be different from yet another's, so it's all down to personal opinion and personality...
 

Lexodus

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Apr 14, 2009
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Not at all. As they say on Facebook, 'looks aren't everything but you can't wank over personality'. I suppose there's a difference between somebody who's not particularly attractive, and somebody who's not attractive to YOU. You could be happy with the former if they were really special or made you laugh or something, but the latter? That's pretty much all-encompassing, and pretty crippling to a relationship.
 

Troublesome Lagomorph

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May 26, 2009
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I'd rather be single than date an attractive or unattractive person. Being single is awesome.
But to actually answer your question: Personality is everything. If you're an ass or an idiot, gtfo.
 

Dumbfish1

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Oct 17, 2008
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You can have a friendship with someone who's personality you like, but you need physical attraction for romance.
 

Thundero13

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Mar 19, 2009
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Well... this is a big theoretical seeing as how I can find good features about most anyone if I look long enough and being in a relationship with them would just make it moe likely that i'd find them attractive but... well I suppose if looking at someone actually repulsed you... maybe... hmm...
 

Ganath

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Jan 24, 2011
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I havn't dated a lot. I'm much like a basement gamer personally. Additionally, I can't stand people who put everything into looks. I find them rather shallow. I'm fairly certain it's about the personality for me, or rather, how a person is in general that matters. Why? Because my girlfriend is a gamer, just like me. And that was how we got together in the first place, not by finding each other attractive (Lookwise), at least not originally.

This thread makes me recall a statement made by a guy once. He told my girlfriend that his gal' was a model, so she looked better than her. It made her feel a little insulted and I almost told the guy that she was studying to become a scientist, which makes her win by default because his girlfriend is "just a model" That would've been somewhat cruel, I realize. But the way some people care so much about looks is rather absurd to me. To clarify, I never told him that. I told that to my girlfriend, to comfort her a bit. It seemed to cheer her up.

Eitherway, I'm pretty sure she feels the same way about personality, which makes us connect even more I reckon, as I'm probably below on the looks scale, hah.
 

Crazy

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Just place a bag over their head if its the face. Plastic surgery if its the body.
 

Michael Hirst

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May 18, 2011
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If I can't find someone attractive then dating them is simply wrong, deceptive really. I don't demand my women to be super models but I have to be attracted to them it's just part of nature, plus I'm in the fortunate position of having a good looking girlfriend who I really get along with as well.

A better question would be "Could you date a drop dead gorgeous person but not really like them? (you're in it for the sex etc)"
 

Jonluw

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May 23, 2010
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Of course.
Physical attraction is practically the thing that separates platonic relationships from romantic ones.
[sub]And don't give me that stuff about 'love' being this intangible thing that is only present in romantic relationships.[/sub]

As nice a person as someone might be, if I don't find them attractive I will not want to be in a romantic relationship with them.

Maybe if I was asexual.
 

ThreeWords

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Feb 27, 2009
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Laurie Barnes said:

Your problem may well be that you seem to think that people's worthiness is defined by a single factor. If you go around talking like this you'll earn only the ire of most women.

As for my own opinion, I find that people exist on a sliding scale based on how I find their general company. If you're hot but brain dead, you can hop it, but on the other hand an ugly genius will be disappointed. You gotta get a decent score in several areas, but it does mean that I get criticized sometimes because I date people who aren't models
 

Ham_authority95

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Dec 8, 2009
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Laurie Barnes said:
Not much to be said about this, other than I have been single for a long time and don't see myself changing that habit any time soon.
My friends tell me that I need to lower my standards, or at least strongly imply it. While I don't feel that is the only reason I can't get a date they may have a point.
My problem is that, judge me as you please, I cannot pursue a relationship with someone I do not find physically attractive. Personality counts for a bit, but for reason of genetics and simple taste I cannot overcome my obsession with appearance.

I am fully aware that a lot of you will think I am a terrible person, but that's just how I am wired, (poorly that is).

So I ask you my fellow escapists, how important are looks to you?

Edit: I want to add that I think my beliefs on the subject were heavily influenced by my father. One of the earliest comments he gave me on the subject was, "Don't ever lower your standards, how do you think I ended up with your mother?"
Isn't being attracted to the person the point of dating?

Attraction is much more than physical, so they can be unattractive in the very way they act, regardless of appearance.

So yes, if the person was unattractive, I'd rather be single in this situation.
 

kazeryu

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Jun 8, 2011
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Love makes blind If you realy love somebody it doesn't matter how he/she looks. But personally for me looks are also important but not a main factor
 

ninja51

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Mar 28, 2010
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Im actually with you. A number of girls have fallen for me, but I unfortunatly must pla asshole and turn them down. One was actually pretty great personality whys. I just cant date some one I don't want to put my mouth on. If you arn;t attracted, why even bother dating someone?
 

FoolKiller

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Feb 8, 2008
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jakko12345 said:
In short, no. But I would date someone who I personally find attractive but others don't.
I agree.

And frankly, if I don't find them attractive, then it is a friendship and not a dating thing.
 

JokerCrowe

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Nov 12, 2009
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I think looks matter to a point, I mean if I feel nauseous just from looking at her then probably not...
I mean the looks is what makes you interested in the first place, but if you realize that someone you didn't think was all that attractive at first has a lot in common with you and a fantastic personality; at least I would think they got more attractive all of a sudden.
So my answer to the question would be No, I wouldn't rather be single.
In fact, I would rather be single than date someone very good-looking but who has nothing in common with me.