Poll: You Wake Up One Day and Find Out that You Have Become the King of England...

StatusNil

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dscross said:
funny story, the actual rightful heir to The throne isn't actually the current incumbent. The rightful heir was a common Austrialian man who died recently. Mike Hastings, an Australian forklift driver died June 30 in Jerilderie, Australia.

Henry VII didn't actually have any Royal blood but he became king anyway in 1483. I saw it on a Tony Robinson documentary about the plantagenet line.

Hastings was 71. His full name and title was Michael Edward Abney-Hastings, the 14th Earl of Loudoun. Born and raised in England, he moved to Australia in 1960 in search of adventure.
Sir! What is the meaning of this brazen erasure of the reign of His Royal Majesty Richard III, slain and his rightful throne usurped on Bosworth Field by the Tudor Pretender Henry in 1485? Why, on the 22nd of this very month, the faithful shall wear the White Rose of York in remembrance!
 

Ugicywapih

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Neither, I pack up and head back home to Alpha Draconis [https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/David_Icke#Reptoid_hypothesis]. I didn't like the direction Earth was headed in anyway.
 

dscross

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StatusNil said:
dscross said:
funny story, the actual rightful heir to The throne isn't actually the current incumbent. The rightful heir was a common Austrialian man who died recently. Mike Hastings, an Australian forklift driver died June 30 in Jerilderie, Australia.

Henry VII didn't actually have any Royal blood but he became king anyway in 1483. I saw it on a Tony Robinson documentary about the plantagenet line.

Hastings was 71. His full name and title was Michael Edward Abney-Hastings, the 14th Earl of Loudoun. Born and raised in England, he moved to Australia in 1960 in search of adventure.
Sir! What is the meaning of this brazen erasure of the reign of His Royal Majesty Richard III, slain and his rightful throne usurped on Bosworth Field by the Tudor Pretender Henry in 1485? Why, on the 22nd of this very month, the faithful shall wear the White Rose of York in remembrance!
Lol. Oh yeah it's 1485. 83 was the year he 'legitimised' his claim.
 

kasperbbs

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Since the royal family is just a tourist attraction i would just have an endless holiday at the expense of the taxpayers.
 

dscross

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Canadamus Prime said:
Since the British Throne doesn't have any real power and is mostly symbolic, not much.
Well yeah, but the queen has dominion over all dolphins in British waters. true story. Actually she still technically owns all the sturgeons, whales, and dolphins in the waters around the UK, in a rule that dates back to a statute from 1324, during the reign of King Edward II. Lol

She's also allowed to drive without a licence, doesnt need a passport, has two birthdays, has her own cash machine and her own private poet, can create lords, doesn't have to pay tax (she says she does anyway...hmmm), is exempt from freedom of information requests, can ignore or overrule ministerial advice in 'grave constitutional crisis' and is immune from prosecution.

And in fact, sometimes, when she comes to rubber stamping bills, she actually does veto some of them and it's kept hush hush. Nice work queeny.
https://www.theguardian.com/uk/2013/jan/14/secret-papers-royals-veto-bills

Yeh... democracy... :O
 

Dr.Susse

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Apr 17, 2009
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Immediately demand the Marylebone Cricket Club surrender the ashes to the Sydney Cricket club and then see that the English test side are detained on a prison hulk.

And then renounce Johnny Wilkinson's citizenship so retroactively Australia win the 2003 rugby world cup.
 

Johnny Novgorod

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Can the king/queen declare the end of the monarchy or are they stuck with that for good?
 

Strazdas

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I believe it is time for the runaway child to come home. Time to reclaim the colonies.
 

Sniper Team 4

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For fun: I would immediately go try on the Crown Jewels. Because when I saw them, I really wanted to just touch them.

For real: I don't know. Stop Brexit I suppose, but otherwise I'm not sure. I'd like to do something about the current state of the United States, but as far as I'm concerned, if the U.S. wants to stand in a fire and burn while complain about it being hot, then there is now an entire ocean between me and that raging inferno.
Oh, I'd forbid that thing in the President's office, and all of his lackies and family members, from setting foot in my country. Can I do that as king?
 

fenrizz

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Conquer Ireland, Wales and Scotland.
England will now be one nation.

Create a new east india company and restore the empire.
 

Terminal Blue

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I'd do a Carol II and be such an immensely corrupt hedonistic **** that everyone would get sick of me and dissolve the monarchy, thus accomplishing my political goals while also getting some hardcore partying in.
 

Chimpzy_v1legacy

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Probably just sit back, enjoy my vast fortune and do fuck all if I can help it. Maybe collect a harem of concubines.
 

Catfood220

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My first thought was that I would dissolve the Royal Family because FUCK those over privilaged cunts.

But, this is a fun thread, so lets have some fun.

First, take back control of my country from the useless idiots currently running it and return all power to me. I will do this by force if I have to as I'm pretty sure the military is sworn to me.

I now have all the power, there will be people to guide and advise me, but ultimately I make all the laws.

Second, change the national anthem to this:


There, isn't that so much better than the dirge we currently have?

Third, buy Aston Villa football club thus giving them almost limitless funds.

Forth, make sure that the plane carrying Trump and Pence never makes it to Britain to meet me, but make sure that it cannot be traced back to me.

Fifth, give Northern Ireland back to the Irish.

Sixth, offend as many people as possible. If Phillip can do it, then so can I.

Seventh, legalise drugs. Hold drug filled orgies in Windsor castle.

Eighth, just have a massive around the world trip around the world getting drunk and making a total arse of myself, making sure that I am on the front page of the newspapers every day for making an arse of myself. This is to upset all the people who get upset or offended about anything.

Ninth, fire everyone who currently works at Radio 1 and replace them with people who have a clue about what is music. I know this makes me sound old, but music today is not music, its a collection of annoying sounds. To quote Rupert Giles, "I know music, music has notes".

Tenth, have a "Employee of the week" every week, everyone in Britain will it at least once.

Eleventh, have the worlds top scientists work on a way for me to become immortal so that no one messes with the vision I have created for England.

That's about all I can think of. I think my new Britain will be great. Anyone who disagrees will be executed for treason. You have been warned.
 

happyninja42

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Abolish the royalty, because their "royalness" is based on mythical, religious bullshit and nothing more, and then go back to my job.

There is nothing special about "royal" bloodlines, other than the societal weight we seem to think they deserve.
 

Wakey87

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Abdicate, Declare a Republic, stop Brexit?

Fuck that. civil war, regain all power and start taking shitty countries like the good old days. Rule Britannia!