Psychotic reviews stuff, Katawa Shoujo Act 1, 4Chan?

[Safe in the Dark]

I liked the game but I feel like I'm missing the point, this is my first visual novel game but I can't help but feel that I didn't actually control anything because at times it would take at least 30 minutes for me to arrive at an actual choice section and while I do feel that at least 2 choices had a big impact but it still bothers me that it takes 30 minutes plus time of pure reading to get to a choice part.

Also, Hanako doesn't get enough screen time damn it.

Spoiler: Another point about choices, with spoilers

Why is that during the classroom section when you are alone with Hanako your character feels the need to answer questions and you as the player just want the choice to go over and talk to her but heaven forbid!

I mean really, why can't I decide directly who I make friends with and who I let get more screen time?

I understand I'm new to visual novel type games but still....I feel cheated out of an opportunity to enjoy myself and that is essentially my gripe with the game, lack of choices when they should clearly be present.

Nice review though it borderlines on showcasing, also nice avatar.

Hmm...Well the best answer I can hope to give is that since it's only the first chapter/a work in progress you'll get more choices and have more impact in the full version,I hope.Some visual novels give you a quick amount of choices some are a bit less frequent.

And no Hanako doesn't thats the reason it didn't get a perfect score.

Well...That and the choices thing,but I let a few problems slide because this really is just a demo,and for being completely free.

And about the showcasing I hope there isn't too much,and thanks I love this avatar....BTW what did you think of Kenji?

Hanako's ending wasn't too great either at that, least I learned how skip mode works (again this is my first visual novel experience).

Kenji was annoying much like Misha but at least he was funny unlike Misha who was just annoying.

The bathroom conversation lasted too long for comfort though....now if only you replaced Kenji with Hanako in that scene then she would have gotten enough screen time in my opinion.

Kenji is like a crazy Harry Potter.xD

Hanako's was actually my second favorite tied with Lily and Rin,Emi last and I liked Shizune's and kenji's the best.

And that would have made the conversation better.=D

Also your True PP's in the forum games are awesome.

 

[DeadpanLunatic]

I have removed my words from this site.

 

[Safe in the Dark]

[user]Cleril[/user] brought to my attention that this review may qualify for being featured over at the Obscure Games Group [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/groups/view/Obscure-Games-Group], and while I do agree that the subject matter covered well exceeds our standards in terms of general attention, there's a few problems with the review that put me slightly against highlighting it as a great achievement.

When in doubt, weasel out. I decided to feature this review over at our group (You may take this as an honor, a compliment or an insult, whichever you prefer), but also provide some feedback on the actual review, if only in an effort to show that I don't accept anything and everything.

Spoiler: Review Notes

[HEADING=1]Katawa Shoujo[/HEADING]​

[HEADING=2]4Chan?OH NO![/HEADING]
Thats right folks,today I'm reviewing Katawa Shoujo a visual-novel game by Four Leaf Studios,firstly though. (First of all, this may sound like a pet peeve, but there's a reason why it's common practice to hit space after using a comma or full stop: It makes the whole thing go a lot easier on the eyes. Please make sure to do so. Secondly, aren't you missing part of your sentence? "firstly though full stop"? Better use of punctuation should have it look like this "by Four Leaf Studios. Firstly tough, when I said "a game made by 4chan", what did you imagine?")When I said a game made by 4chan,what did you imagine?A creepy meme-filled piece of garbage that should be cast into a fire?Probably.Well this is not that game the game is not like this at all,and I'll be happy to explain why.

[HEADING=2]Premise[/HEADING]
You may be wondering "But Psychotic, you marvelous madman, (Learn from someone who's been through this: Until you've established yourself, and your distinct style in the "User Review" section, keep the Yahtzee vibe as low as humanly possibly) what in the world is this game like?" (This isn't the mindblowing "reviewer predicts audiences reaction" instance that requires literally putting words in our mouths. Of course were wondering, you haven't told us yet. It's a review, hence you should be telling us what the game is like. Simple as that) Simple,it's a bishoujo visual novel that takes place in a school for disabled students(This sentence should probably end here. Either way you need some sort of conjunction between two related, but not entirely connected facts.),Katawa Shoujo literally translates into Disability Girls.If you're unfamiliar with Visual-Novels it'sthey're a lot like reading an interactive book:you go through the dialogue making certain story altering choices along the way.If you only like games for the aspect of shooting and mindless violence this really isn't the game or review for you.If you enjoy a game with a colorful cast and a story that is both heart warming and in places comedic,you will want to at least give this overlooked gem a chance.But yes, it's a game about Disabled girls "Is it offensive?" you may be inclined to ask,well I'll be getting back to that in a bit.Another thing,this is only act 1,meaning not the whole game,the full game is still being developed as we speak,Think of this like a demo. (This strikes me as a awfully haphazard, comma ridden sentence that should, in the current form at least have two full stops along the way. Pretty badly phrased too.)I'll review the full game when it is released.

[HEADING=2]Story[/HEADING]
You take the role of Hisao Nakai,an average everyday ordinary student. (Are you sure there's no better way to express that he's an everyday guy? "average everyday ordinary" is just too redundant) This is where things get interesting (No, actually this is were things are still boring, as you've just told us. I believe you mean "Things get interesting", or something along the lines of that),Hisao soon discovers he has a terminal heart condition and nearly dies. He is infirmed for around four months and afterwards he is told he must attend a special school.He is of course reluctant to leave his old life and expects the worst to happen,but decides he has to go.There Hisao meets several other characters each unique and colorful in their own way.From there (Repeated usage of there for both local and temporal reference, neither of which are well defined. Vary your choice of words a bit.) you take control of hisao and as the story and dialogue progresses you of course make decisions that alter and add to the story. Whether you help girl x with something,or side with girl y in an argument,every action has an equal and opposite reaction,and each of the five girls has a distinctive personality and condition.

[HEADING=2]Characters[/HEADING]

From left to right,Lily,Hanako,Rin,Shizune and Emi.

Lily Sato:Blind since birth. Lily is a caring,responsible,and highly intellectual girl, who is close friends with Hanako,and is Shizune's rival.

Hanako Ikezawa:My personal favorite of the five.Hanako was in a house fire that left her severly traumatized-Comma removed- and with burns over the rightside of her body. She is shy, and self concious and most likely sought Lily as a friend due to her blindness,they both help eachother.

Rin Tezuka:Since Rin?s arms are tiny stumps due to a severe birth defect and subsequent surgery, she uses her feet and occasionally her mouth to do everything, which includes painting. Because of her disability, using skirts is tough, so Rin is wearing a boy?s uniform at school. Her creativity is matched by her philosophical streak: Rin is fond of occasionally getting lost in thought and giving voice to abstract ideas about man, the universe, and other things that thoroughly confuse people.

Shizune Hakamichi:Strong willed and forceful, Shizune is definitely the leader type. She?s been the class rep, despite being deaf and mute, for as long as her class has had one, and generally takes charge in just about any situation she?s placed in. Shizune is known around the school as a fearsome taskmaster, and skilled manipulator, but also as a fair and just leader.

Emi Ibarakiespite being left with legs amputated below the knee, Emi is perhaps one of the most cheery, happy-go-lucky girls on the entire globe, let alone the school. Not one to be left in despair even after the accident that claimed her legs, Emi views her disability more as a blessing, her prosthetic legs having brought her to the heights of her ability on the track team rather than becoming a permanent obstacle.

[HEADING=2]Closing thoughts.[/HEADING]

(Since all you told us so far is what the game's about, this is the part were the reviewing should begin. You know, judging the quality of each individual aspect of the game, talking about the experience, the like. And you've got what? A single paragraph? Depth is your friend.)

In my opinion this is a wonderful and charming game,Katawa Shoujo is surprisingly enthralling. Despite being created by the "Internet Hate Machine", it's deep, almost poetic at points. The characters are honestly intriguing and the story is beautifully written.
Dismissing this games solely due to the fact that it is made by 4Channers is ignorant. This is a piece of art. It is the first push in the industry to make this content acceptable. These characters aren't "cripples" in the player's eyes, they're people.
After playing the demo, I can say with the utmost assurance that I will never look at a disabled individual as I previously have, again. That alone is the sign of an excellent game.I highly recommend this game,and I give it a 9.5/10

If you want the free download,or are at least slightly curious,Heres the official site :http://katawa-shoujo.com/

Okay, let me get my biggest complaint out of the way first: More fullstops! Punctuation really needs a bit of work here. There's times when capitalization suggests you ended the sentence, and I still just find a comma. There's times when you should have used a colon, I find a comma. And please, please press space after using punctuation.

Next on the list, checkbox format. I can't condemn it as outright awful, but the idea is somewhat frowned upon around here (just like the score system actually). I know it helps organize your thoughts, but ideally your thoughts should flow neatly into each other without even needing to stop dead and loudly announce "I'm gonna talk about this now". It's hard to pull off genuine flow through your entire piece, but it's possible, and it's definetely what you should be aiming for.

Thirdly, depth. The idea of a review is to judge the quality of a game. Now this can mean several things, depending on how you choose to interpret the mission statement. You could judge every aspect one by one, or talk about the general experience, what's it like to pick up this game and go through it. Either way, there's one definite thing you need to remember: Your job is not so much to talk about what a game does, and more to talk about how well it does it. I'm not saying you shouldn't mention the content at all, but do so with a purpose. To make sure were on the same page, to give us a rough idea of what it's about, to examplary highlight a flaw or quality. Unless you really, really think you've got a good reason to do so, never simply list things the game has. Why list all the game's characters for instance? Your main point was to show that they were unique and colorful, and even if I wouldn't be willing to take your word for it, comparing two antithetic characters would have sufficed.

So for next time, proofread a bit more, practices your punctuation and expand your ideas.

Take the whole bit with as many grains of salts as you may like. If you need any more feedback I'll be happy to help.

I appreciate your feedback, and I'll try to fix a bit of errors. It wasn't terrible for a first review was it?

 

[DeadpanLunatic]

I have removed my words from this site.