Reliable Source: Advertisers, Mourners and Presidents

wilsonscrazybed

thinking about your ugly face
Dec 16, 2007
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Reliable Source: Advertisers, Mourners and Presidents

Do videogames protect the ozone layer? Discover the truth on page 10.

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The Great JT

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Oct 6, 2008
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"9.7 percent of Americans too lazy to get a job," eh? Hm, let's see, seeing how there's an economic depression and companies are cutting jobs to keep turning a profit. That's not laziness, that's business. And you're one to talk about lazy, O Ye Whose Company Has Been Re-Releasing Madden '89 For The Last 20 Years.
 

Starke

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Mar 6, 2008
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It's the bit about 250 times as effective as letting Peter Molyneaux talk about any game before release that really cracks me up.

Hilarious as always, man.
 

Fightgarr

Concept Artist
Dec 3, 2008
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EA's strategy in a hopes to boost sales for Madden '10 is to put 13 football players on the cover the game. They also will be releasing Madden '10-s later that year. Upon questioning one member of the team commented, "It worked with Final Fantasy, why can't we do it?[/i]. Madden '1o-2 is slated to come out three months after Madden '10 and is presumed to only contain the female characters from Madden '10. The game consists of moving them around the football stadium and having them do something called 'change jobs'.

Nintendo after refusing to release Super Handgun School Defender made the following statements: "Shooters have become too common in the game market. Us releasing one would show a lack of originality. That is something we do not have." Then they went off to continue work on the new Zelda game.
 

BehattedWanderer

Fell off the Alligator.
Jun 24, 2009
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If Peter Molyneux were to advertise for teens to have sex with the fervor and enthusiasm that he uses to prevent people from wanting to play his games, we'd be an abstinate culture, sure enough. And how many tech-company obligations does obama have?
 

Textbook Bobcat

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Sep 9, 2009
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The Great JT said:
"9.7 percent of Americans too lazy to get a job," eh? Hm, let's see, seeing how there's an economic depression and companies are cutting jobs to keep turning a profit. That's not laziness, that's business. And you're one to talk about lazy, O Ye Whose Company Has Been Re-Releasing Madden '89 For The Last 20 Years.
I think someone has been succesfully foxed by this article. Read it ALL through again, and you'll see where you've erred here.

Humorous as always "Sarkozy's wife applauded his decision to get off the couch".
 
Feb 13, 2008
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Hrrmm..much as I hate to, a word of dissent here.

Perhaps it's because the news was tosh this week anyway, but it didn't quite get in those chucklesome corners. Needs more red wine imho.
 

Clashero

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Aug 15, 2008
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I resent that statement about Carla Bruni. Much better folk than the stuff that passes as folk nowadays.

But the bit about Molyneaux was genius.
 

samsonguy920

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Mar 24, 2009
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The_root_of_all_evil said:
Hrrmm..much as I hate to, a word of dissent here.

Perhaps it's because the news was tosh this week anyway, but it didn't quite get in those chucklesome corners. Needs more red wine imho.
Because red wine makes everything better. Skaal!
 

LTK_70

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Aug 28, 2009
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The thing is, I wouldn't be surprised to see that article about Sarkozy in the local provocative news blog. :p
 

TsunamiWombat

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Sep 6, 2008
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The Great JT said:
"9.7 percent of Americans too lazy to get a job," eh? Hm, let's see, seeing how there's an economic depression and companies are cutting jobs to keep turning a profit. That's not laziness, that's business. And you're one to talk about lazy, O Ye Whose Company Has Been Re-Releasing Madden '89 For The Last 20 Years.
ppssstt... it's a joke newscast hubba bubba.
 

Pigeon_Grenade

New member
May 29, 2008
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Wow..., too Lazy?!... ya... i was thinking Of getting all the 2010 Sports games when i got my ps3 back from the shop, but no, not touching Any of em now
 

wilsonscrazybed

thinking about your ugly face
Dec 16, 2007
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Clashero said:
I resent that statement about Carla Bruni. Much better folk than the stuff that passes as folk nowadays.
You're right, those french pirates have no musical taste.
 

ahiddenfigure

Hunter of Monsters
Sep 14, 2009
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I got a great response from the shoulder-readers re the pic of Obama holding the WiiMote.

I look forward to the "old friend from high school you had a crush on" suggesting I get a new controller though...
 

messy

New member
Dec 3, 2008
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The second story was by far the best. Others were hit and miss this week
 

Darenus

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Apr 10, 2008
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I only pray that this woman wasn't seriously hoping that she would prevent pirates of her albums to be punished by that because I really think no pirte with pride will download her stuff
 

Spirultima

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Jul 25, 2008
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Ahaha, this guy is suppose to be reliable? I wouldn't even quote anything he says, even as a joke.

I've never heard of "Reliable Source" before, so i don't know if its satirical and for his sake i hope it is, but given the recent news with average american intelligence, i would believe someone if they told me he is being serious.

Also, who wants to play sports games anymore? its the same thing repeated every year, with only improved graphics, on release it costs £40, two weeks later £10, a year later you find it in a sales bin costing 50p.
 

John Funk

U.N. Owen Was Him?
Dec 20, 2005
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Spirultima said:
Ahaha, this guy is suppose to be reliable? I wouldn't even quote anything he says, even as a joke.

I've never heard of "Reliable Source" before, so i don't know if its satirical and for his sake i hope it is, but given the recent news with average american intelligence, i would believe someone if they told me he is being serious.

Also, who wants to play sports games anymore? its the same thing repeated every year, with only improved graphics, on release it costs £40, two weeks later £10, a year later you find it in a sales bin costing 50p.
I don't know if it's the best idea to be so quick to insult the "average American intelligence" lest you want people claiming proof of the "average UK resident's ability to miss blindingly obvious satire." ;)
 

Spirultima

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Jul 25, 2008
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CantFaketheFunk said:
Ahaha, this guy is suppose to be reliable? I wouldn't even quote anything he says, even as a joke.

I've never heard of "Reliable Source" before, so i don't know if its satiricalI don't know if it's the best idea to be so quick to insult the "average American intelligence" lest you want people claiming proof of the "average UK resident's ability to miss blindingly obvious satire." ;)
And i quote...
Spirultima said:
I've never heard of "Reliable Source" before, so i don't know if its satirical...
Admittedly on the Escapist the average american is fairly intelligent, but the average IN america, is not, with recently news, its hard to miss, and instead of "oh, there are a few smart ones, but the rest aren't so much" I'd rather come straight out with it.
 

Pawzilla

New member
Sep 12, 2009
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Please look at that picture of Obama holding a Wii Remote and tell me this could be, in any way shape or form, serious.

Great article(s) by the way.

I had to watch Obama give that speech in my AP US History class.

Best part was all the "Alerts" they had at the bottom while he was speaking.

"Alert: Obama's mother had to get up at 4:30 in the morning to teach him crap."

That stuff is important.
 

wilsonscrazybed

thinking about your ugly face
Dec 16, 2007
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Pawzilla said:
Please look at that picture of Obama holding a Wii Remote and tell me this could be, in any way shape or form, serious.

Great article(s) by the way.

I had to watch Obama give that speech in my AP US History class.

Best part was all the "Alerts" they had at the bottom while he was speaking.

"Alert: Obama's mother had to get up at 4:30 in the morning to teach him crap."

That stuff is important.
Hey me too!!! Damn the government making me Miss a boring history class!