River Rush is Natal Rafting and Molesting Game

Tom Goldman

Crying on the inside.
Aug 17, 2009
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River Rush is Natal Rafting and Molesting Game



Details on a Natal game still in development were leaked by movie writer/director James Gunn.

Though we already know about some of the games coming to Sony's PlayStation Move [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/99826-Hands-on-With-the-PlayStation-Move] motion controller, those coming to Microsoft's Natal are mostly still whispered about in dark rooms. Thanks to James Gunn, a movie director/writer that has worked on films such as the awesome Dawn of the Dead and the even more awesome Scooby-Doo 2: Monsters Unleashed, details on a Natal game called River Rush are now available.

Gunn was able to play River Rush at a Microsoft event, a game that appears to involve rivers, rushing, and rushing down those rivers to collect stars. On his blog [http://www.jamesgunn.com/2010/04/15/quick-impression-on-microsofts-natal/], Gunn writes:

It's a game where you stand side by side in a river raft, so it's two people playing at once. To move right, you have to step right; to move left, you have to step left. As you rush down right rapids, you have to jump up and slap floating stars in the air - the whole raft jumps up every time you do.

Gunn also liked the spastic Pong-style ball blocking game always shown with Natal, but says that River Rush took even more energy to play. Gunn believes: "The ONLY drawback to the Natal some people may have is that you have to get up off your ass to play it," and that he "wouldn't be surprised if in a few years we see a decrease in childhood obesity simply because of the system." Videogames creating healthy people? No way.

Hints to a couple of other Natal games were given to Gunn, as a Microsoft representative told him "there were boxing and football and other Natal games coming out." A boxing game that uses a motion controller... how incredibly creative. We should see the entire launch lineup of Natal games at E3 according to Microsoft [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/98959-Microsoft-to-Show-Full-Natal-Lineup-at-E3-2010].

And, though it seems to have been deleted off his blog, CVG [http://www.computerandvideogames.com/article.php?id=243158] logged a paragraph of Gunn's that read: "Dave's (Gunn's friend) avatar was a girl during River Rush, probably because Dave feels like a little princess inside, and I suddenly realized how awesome it would be for my avatar to molest Dave's. As my avatar rubbed its crotch against Dave's avatar's ass the Microsoft folks started laughing and said that was the first time they had seen anyone do that." Maybe Natal won't be so bad after all!

(Via: CVG [http://www.computerandvideogames.com/article.php?id=243158])


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DarthLurtz

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Jun 8, 2009
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Sounds awesome. Without the need for handheld devices and full-body sensing, this can really open up possibilities for games. I would love a boxing game that read my movements instead of a wii-mote.
 

Broken Orange

God Among Men
Apr 14, 2009
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Rafting and molestation? sign me up!

I think that Natal has potential to be awesome. Just like the Wii did. Fingers are crossed that it won't suck.
 

Nerf Ninja

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Dec 20, 2008
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Well these games sound like world beaters [/sarcasm]

Why do developers that insist motion control is the way forward for gaming persist in creating the worst kind of shallow pathetic party game they can come up with. If you want to impress us make an impressive game, not arm flail 2: the son of spastic action.
 

Andy_Panthro

Man of Science
May 3, 2009
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Surely the (tabloid newspaper) headline here should be "Microsoft condones sexual assault!".

On a more serious note, I wonder how much avatar-to-avatar contact will be allowed when these games reach the shelves? I can see such things being reduced to protect children's fragile minds...

Of course, I won't be bothering with this, I'm a PC gamer. No getting up and jumping around for me thanks, sounds like far too much hard work for a game.
 

Jeronus

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Nov 14, 2008
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I have high hopes for motion controls. We could be looking at the future of gaming.
 

DividedUnity

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Oct 19, 2009
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I wonder why he would delete something like that from his blog hahaha.

Anyway, Natal is just Microsoft trying to do what the Wii has done.
 

lwm3398

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Apr 15, 2009
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The Natal actually works like it's supposed to? As in, it's motion control works, and it can even pick up movements behind another person's ass?

Sounds like it might be pretty cool, then.
 

Gildan Bladeborn

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Aug 11, 2009
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Aww, I was halfway hoping to hear that molestation was a core gameplay mechanic, rather than just emergent behavior, as that would mean somebody somewhere was out of their minds (or channeling Japan, which is pretty much the same thing really).
 

Therumancer

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Nov 28, 2007
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Wow, pong and river rafting... Sorry it doesn't impress me at all. I can see why casual gamers who love things like Wiiplay and stuff will enjoy this, but for people who play "regular" games where I want to play a good old-fashioned stat-tastic RPG, a sandbox adventure/crime/whatever game, or heck even a fighting game... what does this do for me?
How does this make my monster slaying more enjoyable? How on earth is this going to somehow make a game like "Dragon Age" where I have limited direct control over the game, better? I mean there isn't much I can see a motion controller adding to the experience of opening up a bunch of menus, fiddling with some settings and numbers, and then going back to the game and telling a character "go there and kill that" so I can see how the adjustments I made work out. :p

I can see the potential for a boxing game I suppose, but I'm not much into "sportfighting" I mean when I do fighting games, I prefer them fairly over the top. I mean I want characters who can will do crazy C-grade kung-fu movie type stuff along with the realistic stuff. Basically your typical "fighting game"... where does waving a remove around enter into this? Trust me, I can't think of enough ways of moving a remote to coorespond to the number of potential moves and combos in a game like say "Blazblue" or "Dead Of Alive".

... and really, I fail to see any way how this would enhance the control of a sandbox game of any sort... ranging from Prototype and Infamous, to the Grand Theft Auto titles.

Simply put when I look at these things I tend to think that what game developers are getting at in "changing the way games are played" is to more or less replace all current games and game styles with these cheezy Wii-type games.... because honestly, I have yet to see ANY indication that this can be used for real gaming successfully.

Really I am tired of these motion control articles and such, they mostly seem to be "oh yeah, trust us, it's good" while doing nothing to qualify the statement for real gamers. Besides I mean, what does a movie director's opinion have to do with anything? It's not like he's famous as a hard core gamer or whatever.

Now if you were to get a Natal controlled version of Starcraft, or a competitive fighting game, and could convice "well known" champion-level competitive players of those games that it was an improvement to their genere of choice... well... maybe that would mean something.

It's like if they were to get an endorsement from say Jeff Dunham or something... okay yeah, he makes me laugh, he's talented at throwing his voice, but what does any of that have to do with his abillity with/taste for hardcore games?
 

Cabisco

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May 7, 2009
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DarthLurtz said:
Sounds awesome. Without the need for handheld devices and full-body sensing, this can really open up possibilities for games. I would love a boxing game that read my movements instead of a wii-mote.
Yeah, i'd love it until I inevitably punch the TV, breaking it. I mean as a species I?m pretty sure this is just going to be another excuse to break anything in the living room...

I?m considering pre ordering, we have terrible ornaments in the house
 

Archemetis

Is Probably Awesome.
Aug 13, 2008
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Broken Orange said:
Rafting and molestation? sign me up!

I think that Natal has potential to be awesome. Just like the Wii did. Fingers are crossed that it won't suck.
Petty much my thoughts exactly, on both counts.

OT: I'm fairly certain that Natal right now will be bogged down with gimmicky titles, because it's a new device, It's not the Wiimote which been around for years now, developers will have to learn to program games to suit this new medium, and as they get more used to it, I'm certain there'll be more sophisticated titles for it.
 

dochmbi

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Sep 15, 2008
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Baldr said:
Almighty gamer god, please bring interactive porn to the 360.
Oh, the japanese will be sure to provide. This alone might even cause the 360 to start selling in Japan.
 

Ironic Pirate

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May 21, 2009
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Give a man pornography, and he will use it for ten minutes. Give him the tools to make his own, and he'll use it forever...