So , what's the point of being in a relationship.

Zombie Sodomy

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krazykidd said:
I find this to be a terrible reason , it's so easy to get laid now a days , this is basically a non-issue.
Fuck you, it's not a non-issue when you have serious social issues. To answer your question, for me it's a desperate search for someone who I can talk to and who understands and doesn't judge me. My friends and family, while nice people, understand very little about me.
 

krazykidd

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Zombie Sodomy said:
krazykidd said:
I find this to be a terrible reason , it's so easy to get laid now a days , this is basically a non-issue.
Fuck you, it's not a non-issue when you have serious social issues. To answer your question, for me it's a desperate search for someone who I can talk to and who understands and doesn't judge me. My friends and family, while nice people, understand very little about me.
Well if it makes you feel better , once you get over your social issues , you are going to get laid a lot more . It's all up to you . Assuming that's what you want . After that it's all gravy .

I used to have social issues , then i realised , no one cares .
 

scorptatious

The Resident Team ICO Fanboy
May 14, 2009
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Headsprouter said:
I was diagnosed with autism, yet when it comes to love and wanting to be in a relationship, I feel the same way you do.

I'm not offended or anything, I just thought it was kinda interesting when you brought up how the autism spectrum plays into this. Perhaps it does somehow affect how people some people view "love" or "hunger". Who knows?
 

Insertclevername

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krazykidd said:
I find this to be a terrible reason , it's so easy to get laid now a days , this is basically a non-issue.
Oh! It's so easy! Let me get right on that!


Seriously though, some people be in relationships because they either genuinely want to or that they feel that they should. It seems to me that it's very much the latter with you. Maybe taking a break from said relationship would help make things clearer?
 

rob_simple

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Aug 8, 2010
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Is this another 'why do people like things I don't like?' thread? I can't quite be sure.

It's nice to be that close to someone, and share all your stupid hobbies and interests with them. The negatives of being in a relationship only outweigh the positives if you let them, just like anything else, and if that's the case you're probably better off not being in one.

My personal attitude to romantic relationships is that, as soon as they stop being fun for me, there is no point in carrying on. I don't believe in working through things or everlasting love; I believe two people can have a brilliant few weeks, months or years together and then grow tired of each other and move on.

And that doesn't have to be a bad thing, I'm still on reasonably good terms with most of my ex's, but I wouldn't want to go back out with most of them.
 

TheDrunkNinja

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Spot1990 said:


I overuse this gif so much, but dammit it's the only way to describe how I feel right now.

Sir, I tip my hat to you for saying what desperately needed to be said. Thank you.
 

darthzew

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I'm getting married in June, so I can tell you.

I'm in a relationship because I'm in love. I love Jen with all of my heart. Being away from her is something I can no longer do happily, and being with her is happiest I can be. It isn't always perfect and there are down days, but I want no alternative. She is my other half.

In this kind of relationship, Jen is the most important person in the world to me, just as I am to her. Caring for her and she caring for me is rewarding beyond measure. It isn't companionship. That's there. It's more like being complete.

I'm in a relationship because I've discovered that I need to be.

EDIT: Decided to add a few things.

There are days when I'm strong and there are days when I'm weak. When I'm strong, I can lift Jen up so that she isn't carrying life when she's weak. When she's strong, she does the same. I've had so many days where I feel like I can't go on. Some days we're both strong and, on those days, we're happiest. Some days, we're both weak, but at least we have each other to help.

I remember my worst days when I was alone. I don't think I could be here today if I didn't have someone to help me carry life.
 

hawkeye52

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The main reason for relationships from me (bearing in mind I have only ever been in one that was rather short) is that for some reason I get overcome with a crushing loneliness sometimes and feel like something is missing from my life.

What is odd is that I am quite socially active. I currently live in a house of 5 friends (including myself) all who bring their friends over once every so often and I have made special efforts sometimes to go meet someone who I got on well with across the country on the odd occasion.

I guess what it might be is that I am generally quite a closed person when it comes to very strong personal feelings which I don't share with anyone that I know in person (Across the internet it's different and to be brutally honest I don't really give a fuck what people think of me on here) and having someone to share those feelings with was one of the main things that I feel that I got out of it.
 

launchpadmcqwak

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krazykidd said:
Weird question , i know . But what exactly is the point? So many people are In relationships or trying to get into a relationship . Why?

Companionship ? Yeah i get this. Having someone with you to keep you company . But can't you do this with friends and/or pets?

Guarenteed sex ? This is the answer my best ( female ) friend gave me and i quote :" well if you play your cards right you are 100% sure to get sex " . Yes she was being serious . I find this to be a terrible reason , it's so easy to get laid now a days , this is basically a non-issue.

Having a famiy ? This is the only reason that makes sense , i you want to have a family , and are trying to find the right person to start with , then this makes sense . However when you are young or have no intentions of having kids , then this reasons falls through .

I am in a relationship . And i was asking myself whats the point . Why am i doing this . I want no family , i don't need "guarenteed sex " and i don't really SEEK companionship . I can't really find a reason for being in a relationship ( for me personally ) . Relationships comes with it's upsides and downsides , and i find that in general there are way more downsides than upsides . So escapists , what's the point? Why do we strive to be in a relationship?
To not feel lonely and get some sex for a few weeks before the misery kicks in...how long it lasts before the misery kicks in depends on how much you like the partner...but it always does.
 

Lilani

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May 27, 2009
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krazykidd said:
I am in a relationship . And i was asking myself whats the point . Why am i doing this . I want no family , i don't need "guarenteed sex " and i don't really SEEK companionship . I can't really find a reason for being in a relationship ( for me personally ) . Relationships comes with it's upsides and downsides , and i find that in general there are way more downsides than upsides . So escapists , what's the point? Why do we strive to be in a relationship?
I find it a bit baffling that you could be in a relationship and be totally lost on the concept. In fact, I think I don't really believe you, at least in that I don't believe your lack of understanding is as dire as you're making it out to be. Surely you have some level of affection for the person? Surely you've seen people in love? Surely you've seen a couple of rom coms?

I'm in a relationship, and I think the most accurate description for the reason is companionship. As someone else said on page 1, you can't cuddle with a friend on the couch, and you can't hold a meaningful conversation with a pet. It's a deeper, more exclusive kind of companionship. As far as a family I don't know if I really want one. I'd like to get married for sure, but I haven't decided on kids yet. At this point all I want is him, and we can work out the rest when we get there. It's love, you know it when you feel it.

I've posted this video in too many threads like this to count, but if I were ever asked to sit down and describe love, this is about as close as I could ever get.

 

Musette

Pacifist Percussionist
Apr 19, 2010
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For me anyways, I don't think there is a point to entering relationships. In my experience, I have yet to experience any kind of romantic (or sexual) attraction to other people, but I used to date anyways because I thought those feelings were just supposed to kick in after a while. It never did, and the day I told myself that I would not enter another relationship unless there was something distinct that I wanted that was unique to a romantic relationship. I haven't entered a romantic relationship since, and I've been pretty happy and generally content.

I think that at the heart of a lot of romantic relationships is a form of emotional intimacy, though I cannot speak from experience. I think now that casual sex has become a lot more acceptable in some scenes, people are less likely to enter a relationship purely for sex, though from what I've been told, some consider sex as one way of expressing love between significant others. I do know some people whose entire relationships are based on having a consistent sexual partner though, which I see no problem with if both people are consenting (and the relationship isn't toxic in some other way). However, sex is also not a necessary part of a romantic relationship for everyone; there are plenty of asexuals out there that are romantically inclined and will either have a non-sexual relationship or compromise concerning sex. Thinking about it, I suppose it varies from person to person, and not everyone really gains a net benefit from romantic relationships in general.
 
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TheRightToArmBears said:
unless you're my irritatingly handsome friend, in which case, vagina comes flying at you from all angles)
oh god, horrible image in my head..i imagined flying vaginas (just vaginas) swooping in in attack formations on your friend, as if they were tie fighter ships making tie fighter sounds:


OT: Being with someone you love/marrying that person, is much more than just "having a best friend for sex", it's someone you can constantly depend on day in and day out, someone who understands you to your entirety, someone who you can drive up the fucking wall, yet they wouldn't regret a second of it. It's where you can say "she is pretty hott" to a different girl, but only want to go home and shag your lovely partner instead (i've come close to this feeling, which is how i know)

if you can't see that point (i'm not saying that is the only definition of being in love/in a deep relationship, but it is how i feel) then you just haven't reached that point with someone yet, and you need to dump the person your with so you don' lead them on any longer/use them for just a fuck buddy.

ScrabbitRabbit said:
Ideally because it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy and all that good shit.

And sex is nicer when it's with someone you care about. Casual sex is so... awkward. For me, anyway.
also agreed on all this. tried having casual sex a few times, and it is not enjoyable in the slightest compared to someone you care about.
 

A_Parked_Car

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I like the idea of having a very close, committed relationship with someone. I value the strong emotional connection more than the physical intimacy that comes with it, which I simply view as an extension of the previously mentioned emotional connection (e.i. love). I suppose I should mention that I have never had a girlfriend, but I really want one.

If you don't see the point in having a relationship, then don't have one. I will not judge you based on what human connections you do or do not value or see the point of. I can't comprehend the concept of a 'one-night stand' for example.
 

JemothSkarii

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darthzew said:
I'm getting married in June, so I can tell you.

I'm in a relationship because I'm in love. I love Jen with all of my heart. Being away from her is something I can no longer do happily, and being with her is happiest I can be. It isn't always perfect and there are down days, but I want no alternative. She is my other half.

In this kind of relationship, Jen is the most important person in the world to me, just as I am to her. Caring for her and she caring for me is rewarding beyond measure. It isn't companionship. That's there. It's more like being complete.

I'm in a relationship because I've discovered that I need to be.

EDIT: Decided to add a few things.

There are days when I'm strong and there are days when I'm weak. When I'm strong, I can lift Jen up so that she isn't carrying life when she's weak. When she's strong, she does the same. I've had so many days where I feel like I can't go on. Some days we're both strong and, on those days, we're happiest. Some days, we're both weak, but at least we have each other to help.

I remember my worst days when I was alone. I don't think I could be here today if I didn't have someone to help me carry life.
You. I like you. You basically hit it on the head.

OT: I'm going to use a quote from my girlfriend to help me explain:

"Anybody can just cuddle or have sex, but a relationship is truly special when somebody wants to sit down and have a meal just to be with the other person"

It can be difficult to put into words, but people want to be in a relationship when they've found someone they don't like being away from. Not completely miserable mind you, but just...everything seems a lot less bright.I like being in a relationship because it allows me to be me. While I can loosen up around friends there are still some parts of me that I can not let out.

I can write much easier when my girlfriend is around. My biggest want right now is to sleep with her. Not have sex - just cuddle and sleep. It's warm and satisfying and you know you have something great when you work really hard and a simple smile with a "Thank you so much" makes that all worth it.

That's why I'm in a relationship.

P.S Sex is not that easy to do unless you really lower your standards where I am.
 

DoomyMcDoom

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Lonan said:
DoomyMcDoom said:
*sniposaurusrex*
You are not your disease, don't call yourself a sad piece of shit. That's just the cards you were dealt, its not who you are.
I'm also a 27 year old highschool drop out, with debt up to my ass, a dead end job, absolutely no ambition, just enough mental and emotional scarring to be almost incapable of emotion at the best of times, and as far as prospects outside of self depreciating or morbid humour, no recognizable personality traits other than my apathy towards enough shit that I seem like an unstoppable machine that doesn't stop even with leg injuries and enough staples in it to call it an office supply store.

But hey, maybe the fact that I'll probably be a cripple and or dead by the time I hit 40 is enough of a reason that most people wouldn't want me.