Stolen Pixels #19: Assassin's Greed

Shamus Young

New member
Jul 7, 2008
3,247
0
0
Stolen Pixels #19: Assassin's Greed

It's easy to see how The Umbrella Corporation planned on turning a buck, but one must wonder at the company in Assassin's Creed's plan for financial success.

Permalink
 

Eagle Est1986

That One Guy
Nov 21, 2007
1,976
0
0
I thought they did explain it..... they invented everything ever, that's a pretty good way to make money if you ask me!
Good comic Shamus, new game on Thursday/Friday?
 

ElArabDeMagnifico

New member
Dec 20, 2007
3,775
0
0
Eagle Est1986 post=6.71025.711545 said:
I thought they did explain it..... they invented everything ever, that's a pretty good way to make money if you ask me!
Good comic Shamus, new game on Thursday/Friday?
So they do make breakfast cereals.

pseudoidiot post=6.71025.711643 said:
Phase 1: Kidnap assassin.
Phase 2: Put in VR machine.
Phase 3: ???
Phase 4: Profit!
Forgot one.
 

Shamus Young

New member
Jul 7, 2008
3,247
0
0
I think my portfolio is a little too Kidnapped VR Assassin-heavy.

I really need to diversify. I'm thinking of picking up something in the zombie plague or rogue AI market.
 

shMerker

New member
Oct 24, 2007
263
0
0
I think you should consider buying some stock in underpants collection.

Yeah, I think there is a basic explanation for where Abstergo came from and what they're doing buried late in the game. Something about inventing awesome technologies you take for granted and inheriting tons of cash from the Knights Templars. At no time is it ever suggested that VR Assassins are somehow their main source of profit. Towards the end though they do indicate that the company also poisons water supplies and engages in other unprofitable evil activities.

I also think it's pretty great how they're using the VR to search for the whereabouts of artifacts 700 years ago. So if in the ensuing centuries anything has happened to these items the information is worthless.
 

gigastrike

New member
Jul 13, 2008
3,112
0
0
1: kidnap assassin
2: make assassin relive key moment in past so that they can find a map that shows the locations of artifacts capable of controlling the minds of eveyone on the planet
3: aquire artifacts
4: create a shallow utopia where people don't have free will, but also don't fight each other
5: don't make any money, but feel content that they saved the world
Still very funny.
 

Grampy_bone

New member
Mar 12, 2008
797
0
0
Yeah actually Assassin's Creed is a subversion of the usual "EvilCorp Inc." They explain how Abstergo makes their money exactly and how they plan on using Desmond to further their goals. So you're wrong.
 

NeedAUserName

New member
Aug 7, 2008
3,803
0
0
Maybe if that Piece of Eden,(I think thats the name) can change what you see, they would have a car boot sale but make everything look like PS3s, Xbox 360, Wiis, etc.

Or maybe they didn't use money and just made an illusion of it. o_O
 

Shamus Young

New member
Jul 7, 2008
3,247
0
0
Grampy_bone post=6.71025.712516 said:
Yeah actually Assassin's Creed is a subversion of the usual "EvilCorp Inc." They explain how Abstergo makes their money exactly and how they plan on using Desmond to further their goals. So you're wrong.
Congratulations on outsmarting a joke. May your cleverness keep you forever safe from the ravages of laughter.
 

Aries_Split

New member
May 12, 2008
2,097
0
0
Shamus Young post=6.71025.712904 said:
Grampy_bone post=6.71025.712516 said:
Yeah actually Assassin's Creed is a subversion of the usual "EvilCorp Inc." They explain how Abstergo makes their money exactly and how they plan on using Desmond to further their goals. So you're wrong.
Congratulations on outsmarting a joke. May your cleverness keep you forever safe from the ravages of laughter.
Owned.
 

wewontdie11

New member
May 28, 2008
2,661
0
0
Shamus Young post=6.71025.712904 said:
Grampy_bone post=6.71025.712516 said:
Yeah actually Assassin's Creed is a subversion of the usual "EvilCorp Inc." They explain how Abstergo makes their money exactly and how they plan on using Desmond to further their goals. So you're wrong.
Congratulations on outsmarting a joke. May your cleverness keep you forever safe from the ravages of laughter.
I lol'd

Nice comic though, good work.
 

Alex_P

All I really do is threadcrap
Mar 27, 2008
2,712
0
0
"How would Desmond feel if he found he'd been kidnapped by a company famous for on-the-go snacks and breakfast cereals?"

Desmond would probably respond with a mix of emotionless compliance and resigned obedience. You know, like he always does.

-- Alex
 

vede

New member
Dec 4, 2007
859
0
0
Wow, Shamus. I'm really sorry to say this about the comic, but what happened to your grammar here? In the first two cells, you have "kidnaped" (which is technically correct, I think, but rare and you disagree with yourself on the spelling in a later post). Then there's the disagreement of tense between main-character's first and second cells (which is slightly understandable, but still frustrating). Then there's an oddly placed comma in the last speech bubble of the second cell.

Still a great comic, though. One of the best in SP, I think.
 

Lt. Sera

New member
Apr 22, 2008
488
0
0
Grampy_bone post=6.71025.712516 said:
Yeah actually Assassin's Creed is a subversion of the usual "EvilCorp Inc." They explain how Abstergo makes their money exactly and how they plan on using Desmond to further their goals. So you're wrong.
If you just let out the "So you're wrong" part, you would have been spared of an owning ;)
 

ElArabDeMagnifico

New member
Dec 20, 2007
3,775
0
0
While I agree with everyone that we should get some more games that need a good satire, I'm also one of those "Rehashes are ok as long as they keep bringing back more of the good" kind of people, so for what it's worth - I don't care if the majority is gonna be AC and WoW.
 

Brett Alex

New member
Jul 22, 2008
1,397
0
0
Call me behind times, but I just finished Assassin's Creed, like literally 10 minutes ago.
Anyway two thumbs on the comic.
Aries_Split post=6.71025.711632 said:
XD
I loled at the stock part.
Yeah same lol.