The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence) - As Horrible as You'd Expect

Marter

Elite Member
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
14,276
15
43
The Human Centipede 3 (Final Sequence) - As Horrible as You'd Expect

The final - one can only hope - Human Centipede movie is as horrible as anyone could imagine, with an extra dose of self-congratulations thrown on top.

Read Full Article
 
Dec 10, 2012
867
0
0
I have to ask-- what is the difference between a human centipede and a human caterpillar? Does the latter consist of creating a centipede and then cutting it's limbs off? If so, and also if not, why are these people so gross?
 

Marter

Elite Member
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
14,276
15
43
TheVampwizimp said:
I have to ask-- what is the difference between a human centipede and a human caterpillar? Does the latter consist of creating a centipede and then cutting it's limbs off?
You nailed it.

If so, and also if not, why are these people so gross?

Because sex shock horror sells?
 

Darth Marsden

New member
Sep 12, 2008
448
0
0
The link to Bree Olson leads to a page with nothing on it. Might wanna look into that.

Other than that, good review. I've heard much the same from every other critic who's seen it, but I think you're the first to compare it (favourably!) to Paul Blart, which really does raise the question of which film is supposed to be the horror flick.
 

Neurotic Void Melody

Bound to escape
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
4,953
6
13
"Still funnier than Paul Blart: Mall cop 2." Coined on 24th May 2015 by Marter.
Brilliant term! I predict it's overwhelming use on social media through this year. Use it now whilst it's still hot!

OT: Wow, the poor horse on this one needs to be left alone. Do the creators not understand that shock value was all the first film had? If so, they must not understand how they work. Why are the words "cynical cash grab" floating in my head? Go home, cynicism! Just because you're the only logical answer to the mystery of this farce.
 

FPLOON

Your #1 Source for the Dino Porn
Jul 10, 2013
12,531
0
0
Aw shit... I can't wait until this movie "series" get a reboot/remake in the future... Hopefully, whoever's doing them has more love in crafting something worth watching outside of shock value and meta references... right? Right? ...RIGHT???

Other than that, I actually forgot that the second one was in black and white... and meta-references the first movie...
 

Marter

Elite Member
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
14,276
15
43
Xsjadoblayde said:
"Still funnier than Paul Blart: Mall cop 2." Coined on 24th May 2015 by Marter.
Brilliant term! I predict it's overwhelming use on social media through this year. Use it now whilst it's still hot!
I give them my express written consent to use that on the film's DVD cover.

FPLOON said:
Aw shit... I can't wait until this movie "series" get a reboot/remake in the future.
Don't give people ideas!
 

Scarim Coral

Jumped the ship
Legacy
Apr 30, 2020
18,157
1
3
Country
UK
Wait, they actually made a third film out of it???

I guess it will be the most gross triliogy film ever!
 

09philj

Elite Member
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
1,874
576
118
I can imagine that David Cronenberg is really wishing he could put the body horror genie back in the bottle...
 

Evonisia

Your sinner, in secret
Jun 24, 2013
3,257
0
0
I was put off watching the second one because of that meta angle, and I can't imagine how awful this film is. A pity: I liked the first film, largely because of how damn sombre those last ten or so minutes are.

If they dare make a fourth one, they should just go full comedy, remove the horror aspect and be all goofy with the centipedes/caterpillars like putting shit on a stick.
 

Elfgore

Your friendly local nihilist
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
5,655
23
13
I saw the trailer on Hulu about a week ago. The fact that "100% Politically Incorrect" was larger than the title told me everything I needed to know about how meta this film was going to be. Glad to hear it is as shitty as the trailer was.
 

Steve the Pocket

New member
Mar 30, 2009
1,649
0
0
I remember hearing about the original movie, and seeing the famous poster, you know the one, with the titular creature trapped inside what appeared to be a steamy shower with its hands pressed against the glass... and I thought it was going to be some sort of legitimate mad-science creation, you know, like he cut the heads off the back two and actually Frankenstein'd them into a single sentient creature. Kind of gratuitously bizarre, but intriguing in a horrific sort of way. Then I found out what it really was and I was like... that's not mad science; that's a damn South Park episode! (And then South Park would go on to parody it, which was probably inevitable. For my money, Noah Antweiler parodying it by having his character Dr. Insano create a "Human Spider" was funnier just on the concept alone.)

And then the sequel came along and it was literally marketing itself as the same thing but with more people in it, which again felt like something you'd do as a parody. At this point I don't even know what to say. Though I did look up the first film on Wikipedia just now to make sure I was remembering the poster correctly, and learned that it was literally made as a joke. It makes so much more sense now...

Elfgore said:
I saw the trailer on Hulu about a week ago. The fact that "100% Politically Incorrect" was larger than the title told me everything I needed to know about how meta this film was going to be. Glad to hear it is as shitty as the trailer was.
Ugh. So it's actually marketing itself to people who would cheer the villain of the movie on for "saying what other people are afraid to"?



...Well I guess their money's as good as anyone's. And frankly I'd rather siphon as much of it out of their pockets as possible lest they use it for ill purposes. Like making a human centipede and completing the "sequence" of meta. You know, for the lulz.
 

FPLOON

Your #1 Source for the Dino Porn
Jul 10, 2013
12,531
0
0
Marter said:
FPLOON said:
Aw shit... I can't wait until this movie "series" get a reboot/remake in the future.
Don't give people ideas!
But, they probably already have the script all planned out and are just waiting for the right time to spring it out to the general [future] public! It would probably be called The Human Centipede because they don't want the movie to associate with being a sequel to the original Human Centipede if they add anything else to the title...
http://xldcdki.studybreaks.com/sites/default/files/make-it-rain-dollars.gif
 

TristanBelmont

New member
Nov 29, 2013
413
0
0
Yeah
It really sucks
Like....nobody has any expectations yet mister Tom Six is......such a pathetically amateur film maker. Just make something good or quit movies. Please. Fuck.
 

008Zulu_v1legacy

New member
Sep 6, 2009
6,019
0
0
TristanBelmont said:
Yeah
It really sucks
Like....nobody has any expectations yet mister Tom Six is......such a pathetically amateur film maker. Just make something good or quit movies. Please. Fuck.
3 strikes and he's out. Nothing he ever does in the future will be taken seriously, even if it wins all the awards, he will forever be known as "The guy with a shit eating fetish".
 

JCAll

New member
Oct 12, 2011
434
0
0
The cherry on top of the sundae has got to be that they showed a shot of the centipede in the trailer.
 

Quellist

Migratory coconut
Oct 7, 2010
1,443
0
0
I've not watched the first two (despite quite liking Dieter laser) nor will i watch this either...

Two things i take away from this review (not counting the strengthening of my desire never to see any of these films): The 'still funnier than Paul Blart 2' needs to become a meme and the interesting note that the best performance of the film is turned in by an adult actress (though admittedly a talented one).
 

MonsterCrit

New member
Feb 17, 2015
594
0
0
09philj said:
I can imagine that David Cronenberg is really wishing he could put the body horror genie back in the bottle...
That's just it... it's not even body horror at this point it's just boring. Been there done that. You see part of what makes horror horror is that the victims have to be identifiable as in you have to have some feelings for them . In the first film there were 3 victims so we can kinda get to know them...in 2 the vitims are basically faceless mooks and in this one well, just 500 faceless mooks ,, no stories, no personalities to them, just flesh bags.

Thusly the fim is .. boring...and the quirk about gross out... you can only gross someone out once, heck I'm quite sure there's at least 3 sexual fetish sites about this sort of thing. I haven't bothered to check this because that would basically dissolve the last thread of lingering faith in humanity at which point I'd basically release a zombie plague and initiate the skynet uprising just to end it all.
 

Rad Party God

Party like it's 2010!
Feb 23, 2010
3,560
0
0
FPLOON said:
Aw shit... I can't wait until this movie "series" get a reboot/remake in the future... Hopefully, whoever's doing them has more love in crafting something worth watching outside of shock value and meta references... right? Right? ...RIGHT???
It can't get a remake yet until it gets a sequel IN SPACE!!!.