The London Underground

curlycrouton

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The London Underground
What a fantastic invention. Think about it. Say, 200 years ago, who would've thought we'd be
hurled around in compact tunnels in metal pods? It's like something out of an early
victorian speculative fiction novel.

But anyway, my review:

This game has been in development for a while now, from developers London Passenger
Transport Board
, and was promising from the start. But can it live up to the hype?
The Gameplay: As far as I'm aware, the gameplay works well. You start the game by pressing
start to insert ticket, and then off you go, which means the game is very accesible. The
controls are the pretty standard "use legs to walk" setup, and there isn't much else to it.
The problem is though, it's so simple! walk forward, walk forward some more, stop, wait for
train, enter train, wait, exit train, and so on. While this makes for a solid gameplay
experience, it really starts to get samey after a while.



The Graphics: The visuals on the Tube really are fantastic. They use the "Real Life" engine,
which is the most advanced engine on the market. The textures look perfectly
life-like, and the people look like they are standing right next to you, which, technically,
they are. The environments, however, don't do the game justice. It's just mile after mile
after mile of grey corridor, with the occasional homeless guy, it's like the original DOOM!
And for some reason, as soon as you try and look down a tunnel, it goes pitch black! This
could mean that the game's draw distance is very short, which is a heavy blow considering
the greatness of all other aspects of its visuals.

The Inventory System: The Inventory System on the Tube is very open-ended. You can use
anything from a handbag to a hulking rucksack. Most inventory systems, however, are very
insecure, and there are a number of unfriendly NPCs who will try to loot your body while
you're still alive, and with you not noticing. This is rapidly becoming known in the Tube
Community as "pickpocketing".



The NPCs: While on the subject of NPCs, there are interesting observations to be made. For a
start, many of them are simply not open to reaction. You try to press the A button to talk,
and all they do is stare at their book, or give you a funny look, which is a serious
let-down in terms of AI. Some NPCs are, however, very interactive, although not in a
pleasant way. They will often attack you unporvoked, after consuming heavy quantities of
mead at their local tavern, and may even attempt to duel you. There is something to be said
for the sheer amount of NPCs, and the range too. There are simply thousands, ranging from
young children to cocky businessmen in suits to old women with too much makeup, it really is
staggering. And you usually can't go for more than few seconds with seeing an NPC.

The Plot: The plot, it has to be said, is terrible. It basically consists of you, the player,
needing to get somewhere, and then you going there. It is unimaginative and boring.



The Combat System: The Combat System varies, from giving evils to the woman with too many
screaming babies, to drunkenly punching someone in the face, one of the few moments when the
game does actually get exciting. There isn't much to be said from the controls, apart from
that they follow the old "swing fist, hit face, do 10 damage" style.

The Soundtrack: The Soundtrack really is amazing, with buskers wailing out old Marc Cohn
tunes, to howling wind eminating from the tunnels. You really get a sense of being
surrounded.

Overall: A great, graphically stunning game, but a bit too repetitive, and slightly bland.

55%

Point of Discussion

Do you use the Tube? How often? What do you think of it? What's the underground rail service like in your area? What's the funniest thing that you've ever seen on the Underground? Discuss all things underground rail related.
 

Lukeje

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I'm coming to the conclusion that the 'Reviews' section needs to be split up into 'Gaming Reviews' and 'Miscellaneous Reviews' (with this review being in the latter category). Good review, if a little bizarre...
 

Amnestic

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Aug 22, 2008
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Here's my review [http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=FYVJSOFZxDE]. Well, not "mine", but it does pretty much sum up my opinion of the thing.

I'm not really sure what you were doing here Mr. Crouton. ;/
 

curlycrouton

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Amnestic said:
Here's my review [http://uk.youtube.com/watch?v=FYVJSOFZxDE]. Well, not "mine", but it does pretty much sum up my opinion of the thing.

I'm not really sure what you were doing here Mr. Crouton. ;/
Why, explaining my views on the Tube in a comical and slightly surreal fashion.

Hmmm, perhaps it does belong in the User Reviews section. I would be most pleased if a mod could move it there.
 

curlycrouton

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sirdanrhodes said:
Very funny, but I think he just opened the gate for more reviews just like it.
Oh god, what have I done?

Prepare for a tidal wave of amateur writings.
 

NeedAUserName

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God, I wish I new how to do links, but I don't. But my point, there is a spoof of The Jams Going Underground on YouTube, called London Underground. Its great.
 

curlycrouton

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needausername said:
God, I wish I new how to do links, but I don't. But my point, there is a spoof of The Jams Going Underground on YouTube, called London Underground. Its great.
Seen it. It was a viral success back in 2005, I think.
But thank you for mentioning it nonetheless.
 

Jamash

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Jun 25, 2008
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Personally I fucking hate the tube.

I hate London too, but I especially hate the tube. It's far too crowded and manic, with everybody rushing & pushing each other, I suppose they all hate it as much as I do.

That being said, it's always been very reliable for me & gets me across London quicker than walking, buses or cars, it's just very uncomfortable.

I suppose it's a victim of it's own success, it's only crowed because everyone uses it, because it works so well. If it was so shit & unreliable that hardly anybody bothered using it, well it would be less crowded but not much use to me.

I always dread tube journeys, but can always look back on them with humour, especially the surreal social awkwardness there is when you get a lot of complete strangers jammed together in close proximity, with everybody trying to ignore everyone else & not make eye contact.
 

curlycrouton

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Jamash said:
, especially the surreal social awkwardness there is when you get a lot of complete strangers jammed together in close proximity, with everybody trying to ignore everyone else & not make eye contact.
That is what I love about the Tube. It forces normally introvert people to be in close contact with lots of strangers. the results are often quite comical.
 

Baonec

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Funny if incredibly odd, hope we get some more reviews for things other then games...I call for a petition for a new review section.
 

NeedAUserName

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curlycrouton said:
needausername said:
God, I wish I new how to do links, but I don't. But my point, there is a spoof of The Jams Going Underground on YouTube, called London Underground. Its great.
Seen it. It was a viral success back in 2005, I think.
But thank you for mentioning it nonetheless.
Probably was.
 

Jamash

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Jun 25, 2008
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curlycrouton said:
Jamash said:
, especially the surreal social awkwardness there is when you get a lot of complete strangers jammed together in close proximity, with everybody trying to ignore everyone else & not make eye contact.
That is what I love about the Tube. It forces normally introvert people to be in close contact with lots of strangers. the results are often quite comical.
That's true. It leads to a fun game I like to call "I Spy Dirty Looks..."

I like looking around & trying to guess who's the most offended/uncomfortable out of my fellow passengers, e.g. "I bet that guy's racist, that's why he looks so uncomfortable now that a black person has sat next to him", or seeing uptight & insecure businessmen who think they can catch 'the Gay' if they're in close proximity to a gay/camp person.

Even better is when a Muslim or stereotypical Muslim looking person gets on with a bag/backpack, I like looking around and trying to work out who thinks he's a bomber. People give them shifty sideways looks & every so slowly start edging away from them, like that would really help if he did explode.

I know I'm just as guilty of prejudice by pretending I can see prejudice in other people, but it's a fun way to make the time go by & unbearable journeys more amusing.