Twitch Plays Real Life Stream Announced

PsychicTaco115

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Twitch Plays Real Life Stream Announced

Taco News Network is where Buzzfeed goes to get sources for its Top Ten Lists. It's where Rush Limbaugh and Keith Olbermann come to discuss topics for their shows. It's where nightly news becomes nicotine for the everyman. We dig to find the truth where none may be and bring it out of the murk to you for your intellectual pleasure.


//cdn.themis-media.com/media/global/images/library/deriv/1425/1425098.pngTwitch Plays Pokemon made headlines three years ago when the popular streaming site's community played Pokemon Red. Today, an anonymous developer has continued the project by proposing a new game: the game of life. Starting on January 1st, Twitch chat will be able to control the actions of a single person and attempt to navigate him or her through the perils of everyday life.

"I was always fascinated with how players were able to overcome the challenges present within the game even with thousands of people trying to do things at the same time. I want to be able to do the same but within the realm of three dimensions. While Pokemon was a success, I think this can top that easily," said the developer, who wishes to remain anonymous so that people will not doxx him.

"The stream will be a first person perspective with a GoPro attached to the subject. There is no real end-goal, but instead there will be tasks that need to be done on different intervals. Things like eating, showering, going to the bathroom and brushing teeth are all small goals at the beginning but soon the goals will get more complex like reading a book, driving and thinking about the vast unknowns of the universe."

To prevent trolls from doing lasting damage to the player character and others, the developer has made actions like breathing already encoded while also disabling several actions from the start. This includes shouting racial slurs at minorities, yelling Nazi propaganda at children and attempting suicide by auto-erotic asphyxiation. Although the ban list is already extensive, the developer has promised to quickly disable other harmful actions as the stream progresses.

"While I would have loved to give the chat absolute freedom, I already know some people would use this to try and push their agenda, specifically that of the alt-right. This is a social experiment and has to follow the ethical guidelines of the Institutional Review Board. I'm very excited to see the results of this stream and what it means for the future of live-streaming," said the developer.

Taco News pitched the idea of using our field intern as the subject but neither Twitch nor the developer has responded. Keep an eye out for a possible naked man taking one step at a time through the streets. Screaming.

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tippy2k2

Beloved Tyrant
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Mar 15, 2008
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Oh sure, a developer straps a camera to someone and it's art but when I strap a camera to my head so everyone can see what I do it's "wrong" and "a crime against God" and "technically pornography"!

People just don't appreciate my Petting Zoo videos :(
 

Saltyk

Sane among the insane.
Sep 12, 2010
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Ugh. Really? We're doing this? You know I don't pay for this kind of content, guys. And why is this article so political? I don't come here for politics. Also, I can't help but feel this author is racist.
 

JenSeven

Crazy person! Avoid!
Oct 19, 2010
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Let me give you some inspiration for future content, because what I will link now is actually funny.

http://thehardtimes.net/harddrive/disrespectful-immigrant-protester-tears-flag/
 

Xorph

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Aug 24, 2010
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Saltyk said:
Ugh. Really? We're doing this? You know I don't pay for this kind of content, guys. And why is this article so political? I don't come here for politics. Also, I can't help but feel this author is racist.
I wouldn't say the article is political insomuch as the creator of the experiment is being overly political about it, but not exactly the author's fault :shrug:
 

Xorph

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Aug 24, 2010
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Wait, dag, I just read the hurricane Jose article, I got satire'd on, didn't I?
 

Saelune

Trump put kids in cages!
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Xorph said:
Wait, dag, I just read the hurricane Jose article, I got satire'd on, didn't I?
Saltyk was mocking those who think these articles are bad.
 

Ftaghn To You Too

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If this is going to be a regular thing, that's one thing. People seem to like it even if I don't. But could you add a tag to the article titles, so people can separate them from whatever real news comes in? Just a Taco News: [Article Title] or something.
 

PsychicTaco115

I've Been Having These Weird Dreams Lately...
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Saelune said:
Can I block the 'News' section?
Unofficially yes

How far do you want to go to block news? - Front page? Forum index? Everywhere?

The EscapistPlus add on lets you somewhat hide the front page section - the images stay intact though
Articles would still load in the popular forum posts section and The News Room would still be listed in the index
In the future they might be featured in the front page slideshow as well

One could probably write a userscript to search the page by author and hide their articles per section but that is beyond my knowledge
 

Neurotic Void Melody

Bound to escape
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You know somebody will try this at some point in the future, it'll be the next evolution of 'reality TV' ...and I fear it legitimately has a chance of catching on too.
 

gigastar

Insert one-liner here.
Sep 13, 2010
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I wonder how theyre going to stop the hacker known as '4chan' from hijacking the stream and directing the subject to commit school shootings.
 

DrownedAmmet

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Apr 13, 2015
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Sweet, I wonder if they will fare better than Twitch plays Dark Souls. It will finally end the fierce Internet debates of whether Dark Souls is harder than Real Life
 

Souplex

Souplex Killsplosion Awesomegasm
Jul 29, 2008
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real life is a terrible game.
The UI consists of nothing but a blurry nose, characters are way too feeble, there's waaaaaay too much grinding, and it's waaaay too into its roguelike elements.
 

YourOldFriendNuance

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Souplex said:
real life is a terrible game.
The UI consists of nothing but a blurry nose, characters are way too feeble, there's waaaaaay too much grinding, and it's waaaay too into its roguelike elements.
The permadeath feature is harsh and the way the inheritance rules grossly favor legacy characters means the game is never fair.