Yeah...no.Paradox SuXcess said:[Insert catchy intro here]
And the understand continues in my young but ageing life.
Yes, I am a few thousand years late on that subject but it still has me wondering how it works outside of religion. As any of us in our young development mind were told, "Marriage is between one man and one woman" and may have believed that was true. No, not entirely true. Marriages/relationships comes in many different shapes and sizes. Interracial marriages/relationships, same sex marriages/relationships are becoming more accepted in today's society than it was 50 years ago and that's a great thing. Yes, there is still a lot of negative tension by those who oppose it but the world is becoming more open minded.Polygamy
the practice or custom of having more than one wife or husband at the same time.
However, what isn't talked about much or just seems "taboo" is polygamy. In certain cultures it's normal. The more wives you have, the more blessed you are. Or even the bigger your household, the better God shares his blessing and good fortune. I can't really judge that cause I do not know much about that.
A few years ago, I had an ex who wondered and desired to have two boyfriends at the same time. Two people to love her and she loved them both. Many questions can come from that, mostly, "can you love two people at the same time"? Could you? No, I am not talking about open relationships where one person has flings with someone else outside of the relationship OR having a kinky swingers party once in a while. I am talking about starting a deep relationship with two people. Having all three agree to love one another and maybe grow into something more. Unfortunately marriage may not be the answer cause in many countries, polygamy is illegal.
Two men and one woman, one man and two women, maybe same gendered polygamy relationship. It doesn't have to be 3 but 4. Okay let's stick to three. So allow me to ask, what would your reaction be if your partner wanted to try a polygamous relationship? Would it be something that bothered you? Something you are open too? Have you, yourself, even been in a polygamous relationship or currently in one? Or is the simple answer, love is love and it's something you just can't control.
There is no judging here cause this is an open discussion and respecting opinions and views is something I am about and I know others can be too.
This is actually a really good example of why communication is key. Jealousy is an easy trait to both vilify or praise in a relationship, but there's nothing inherently wrong or right about it. It's about being able to identify and communicate what's inside you to your partner(s) and their ability to reciprocate. There's no need to bring ideologies into the mix (granted, it is possible for people to build an entirely successful relationship around an ideology, but I think their mutual proclivity for it does a lot of the heavy lifting that real communication would otherwise have to do - in other words, they get lucky).Blow_Pop said:Now, I'm not poly. I think I *could* be with someone I actually trusted who gave a shit about me. But I don't know. At the same time I'm a very jealous and possessive person so I'm fairly sure I'm not poly. But I also have a lot of friends who are poly....actually most of my friends are come to think of it.....
That's pretty shitty. Glad to hear you were able to see it for what it was and get out.Or like my last relationship where he just wanted to fuck everyone under the sun without being safe about it or giving a shit about my feelings and I was barely allowed out to see my friends let alone even consider having sex with someone else (he called it poly but let's just call it what it was: an abusive relationship where he wants to feel less guilty about cheating).
lol. I read it right before popping over here and seeing this thread. I wonder if the article inspired it.Worgen said:I'm just gonna link this cracked article from someone who escaped a polygamy cult.
This is true of any relationship.inu-kun said:No, it will almost always not work out,
Man, you made my mouth water so much with this post. I need to have sex with at least one of these meats before the day is done.DevilWithaHalo said:I'm a huge fan of chicken. It's amazing the ways you can cook it. You can grill, BBQ, microwave, dice, strip, add it to salads, sandwhiches, etc. It's healthy for you, tastes great, and I could eat it every day.
But sometimes, I need a steak. A nice New York Pepper Steak. Bloody, thick and covered in a nice wine sauce.
Wanting that steak doesn't change the way I feel about chicken. I could even have chicken and steak in the same day.
So if I eat chicken, am I suddenly not allowed to eat steak anymore? There's lots of chicken out there.
I use food metaphors a lot. Now I was some chicken... and some steak.
The guy in the middle crawls into and out from the middle, I guess the rest of us are heavy enough sleepers that it doesn't bother us.thaluikhain said:Might seem like an odd question, but how does that work? Three in a bed seems like someone would be stuck in the middle and wouldn't be able to get out without climbing over or waking someone.Chris Moses said:I am in a same-sex 3-way relationship. Me and partner #1 have been together for 19 years. Our "third" has been a part of our family for 9 years. We sleep in the same bed.
Many focused on the good or even both to give how their experience was like in the beginning. For you and others it works. No major problems, all the rough edges smoothened out in the beginning and trust established. However, for other it wouldn't work for them cause they had tried it out themselves and things didn't work out too well or just prefer being with just one person or just themselves. The good, the bad, and even the ugly side of trying to attempt such relationship has been expressed in this thread and I appreciate and respect everyone's answers and responses.dragonswarrior said:Something I'm seeing a lot of in this thread... A whole bunch of people that are focusing on the negative aspects of relationships and how those would all be magnified in a poly-amorous relationship.
You do realize that applies to the good stuff too right?
I can only speak for my own, but a really large part of how me and my partners made it through the initial rough spots in becoming poly is because we all had at least two other folks we could lean on for support and help. When I get home from a rough day at work I get three hugs and two kisses. And three different sets of sympathetic ears. Three sets of good advice rooted in love and care and support. Three people that I can completely be myself around and be accepted and loved for it.
That's a frickin' high folks. In a hardcore way. I don't think I could ever express how insanely awesome my relationship is.
The sex is nice too.
Finances are easier as well. All four of us have jobs, and we're able to afford a really nice place that we totally wouldn't have been able to as just couples.