Unforgotten Realms: Episode 13: SS Paladon

SirSchmoopy

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Episode 13: SS Paladon

The stunning cliffhanger continues with the new season of Unforgotten Realms!

Watch Video
 

Spinwhiz

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Oct 8, 2007
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Hello UR Faithful!

Since this video is the season two premiere of Unforgotten Realms and UR is based loosely on table-top gaming, I thought we should have a contest. I want to know your best D&D stories. No, this does not mean I want you to DM a game. I want to know your favorite, funniest and most horrid stories from your D&D experiences. The Escapist staff will pick the 3 best stories and grant those people some NEW UR swag that we have coming out soon. The contest will go until November 27th and winners will be announced on November 28th.

It?s easy; it?s fun?so get to it!

EDIT: Post your story right into this thread.
 

milomalo

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Mar 29, 2008
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omg omg omg omg o my effing!!! god!! this is so awesome!!! im glad this is back and better than ever!! thank you Rob!
 

ReincarnatedParano

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Oct 2, 2008
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Welcome back, UR! And wow, things are really kicking off, huh? Schmoopy has a new costume...? Ohoho, I can't wait to see how he develops, Eluamous also.

And Spinwhiz, I'd love to respond, but I've never actually played a tabletop RP game. Sorry!
 
Feb 13, 2008
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Bets on Sir Schmoopy shotgunning the potion as soon as he gets it?

And Spinwhiz, I have a whole host of stories...will dig out the best soon.
 

cainx10a

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May 17, 2008
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LOL, Tor Anroc!!! Nice, am going to level up some of my T2 characters to T3 in WAR to play Tor Anroc again lol.
 

heavyblues

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Feb 27, 2008
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Well, since this is the last day for the contest, I figure I shoudl enter XD

Alright. I'm DMing a game of Pathfinder. if you've not heard about it, it's a game that sort of continues D&D 3.5e, instead of re imagining everything into 4e
but anyway

My party...
Groshurgak, the half orc cleric
Coye Bane, the Gnome Sorcerer
Jern Strand, the human monk
Thorif Orchater, the pissed off dwarf... ranger
and Cap'n Dread, the human fighter [pirate]
had found a lost young girl named Jeva, who the half-orc had taken under-wing even though there was speculation that she was a werewolf

They were a great deal into the dungeon when they encountered a group of kobold warriors attacking a young girl, so naturally, they assisted -- defeating the kobolds easily. Proceeding further, the party split in 2. Groshurgak and Jeva walking into what looked like a crypt, and the rest of the party into what most certainly was a butcher room. While jern and te rest of the group dealt with 4 ghouls, Groshurgak had a very carnival game-esque time dispatching skeletons. One hit one kill, with his warhammer -- the rest of the party on the other hand almost died. Jern got paralyzed by one of their bites, and the pirate pretty much used him as a meat shield while he fought off the others.

though the best part came when they reached the elevator room- and were attacked by 5 more kobolds... Kobolds are never particularly dangerous, and the pirate decided to use some showoffy flair while killing one. He tried to jump onto the bar across the pit - which was round, and had a slippery chain wrapped around it - and ended up slipping and falling into the well. Jern, apparently feeling a bit more confident, decided to try the same stunt, but fell in all the same. Both of them tumbled down the well into a cauldron being held up by the chain. it lurched down with their impact, but seemed to hold.

Captain dread stared in awe at the bottom of the cauldron, however, dropping his torch off the side as he saw that his trusty wine bottle had smashed. Without alcohol, he was in a state of shock, even while Jern climbed to safety, and attempted to help him out.
The chain finally gave way, and sent him falling to the bottom. the cauldron smashed, and left him laid out in a shallow pit.

Kobolds riding large slimy toad-like creatures known as Slurks were poised to attack. Their first move? Trample him with their slick slimy bellies. As if this weren't bad enough, the other one (as one of my players described it) Splooged this thick sticky slime all over him, so he couldn't move much.

Hearing their party member in danger, the rest of them (Leaving a critically wounded and poisoned Coye alone with Jeva) slide down the chain to help him. this plan goes down the drain, however, when Groshurgak ends up landing on the Pirate. He was already quite wounded, and the impact didn't help matters... but then the poison kicked in, and he fell unconcious. it's a shame the cleric didn't notice. he could've helped - but he finally succumbed to his wounds... lying in a puddle of toad spooge.

To make matters WORSE, once they finally DO clear out the room below, they hear a bloodcurdling scream from the top of the shaft!

that's my D&D story :3

poor gnome x3
 

Spinwhiz

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To clear up a couple questions, post your stories right into this thread. It should be fun to read them all!
 
Feb 13, 2008
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Background : I's D&D Game. Aeron is a Elf MU/Thief with hideous dexterity(21), a lazy attitude and a rat familiar.

I : O.k., anyone want to do anything before we leave?
M : Just one, any jewellery merchants nearby?
I : Uhm yeah, there's one across the river.
M : Ok, I nip in. Anyone else in there?
I : Just the shopkeeper, looking rather bored.
M : O.K. (Adopts Aeron's Voice) Evening Sir! Rat Inspector."
I : (Adopts Shopkeepers Voice) I'm sorry?
A : Rat inspector sir. I'm here to check for rats.
S : Uhm, this is a jewellery merchants, sir.
A : I know that sir, and I have to check for rats.
S : We don't have any rats in here.... this is a jewellers.
A: Are you sure sir? (flashes parchment) Would you mind if I take a look?
S : Yes I would. Get out!!
A : Attempting to block an officer of the.....state are we sir?
S : No, I'm just trying to get rid of a fool.
A : (desperation kicks in) Look, there's a rat there!
S : What? The one on your shoulder?
A : Precisely sir, this warns me of rats and can sniff them out.
S : Look are you going to buy something or do I have to call the guards?
A : I wouldn't call the guards sir. They might find out you have less rats than are prescribed by Law.
S: WHAT???
A : Well sir, only high rent establishments can have no rats. You'd be putting yourself out of business. Perhaps I could sneak some rats in for you?
S : [Descends into rather unmerchantlike language]
 

Spinwhiz

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Oct 8, 2007
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We will also take stories from other tabletop games. Regardless of game, the stories themselves are usually MOSTLY interchangeable :)
 

HobbesMkii

Hold Me Closer Tony Danza
Jun 7, 2008
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Hoorah for Unforgotten Realms! YouTube will wake up soon. They did for Yahtzee, they will if they love you as much as we do, Rob.

Eh, the only tabletop games I played were Warhammer (and 40k) and no great story comes to mind. I never collected quite enough to hold serious battles, only skirmishes with my friends.
 

Tiger Sora

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Aug 23, 2008
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WOW i didn't even realize that it was the 20th today. I was home sick because of a bad headach and after 4 hours of napping i went to go watch Zero Puntuation and after i watched it i noticed the UR episode and i was gleeming with joy. The episode was a good opener with it showing the rest of the battle. The whole dwarf-Kobold war was like a 4-5 min joke but was funny. Now i have to wait another 2 weeks for the 2nd episode, WTF is up with that, i'll live though. ^_^