Unskippable: Armored Core V

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Graham_LRR

Unskippable, LRR, Feed Dump
Nov 13, 2008
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Armored Core V

This story of a giant hole in the ground just got exciting.

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Jan 12, 2012
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DVS BSTrD said:
There weren't nearly enough explosions or crotch shots for a Michael Bay production!
And not one of the mechs was a racist stereotype!

I've always loved how these giant robots have tiny little jets on the back, yet they can swoop about like Tinkerbell.
"Hey, how much thrust do think it would take to lift 20 tonnes of steel, explosives and armoured cores?"
"Damn it, I'm an impractical weapons designer, not a physicist! Just put a couple fireworks on the back, that should do it."
 

Tireseas_v1legacy

Plop plop plop
Sep 28, 2009
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Yes, but can I fly so fast my brain permanently only occupies the back half of my skull? Try doing that with your jet tank...
 

gardian06

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Jun 18, 2012
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The Gentleman said:
Yes, but can I fly so fast my brain permanently only occupies the back half of my skull? Try doing that with your jet tank...
but isn't it a bad idea to outrun the bullets?

I don't know which game to get: VArmored Core, or Armored CoreV. Oh great now I hear that they are coming out with VArmored CoreV, and they are telling me it's the 3rd one.
 

blackrave

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Mar 7, 2012
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Actually jet tanks were already kinda done by soviets
Not exactly tanks themselves but the reactive airdrop system was developed in 70-80s
Main purpose was to drop tanks and APCs directly into frontline
System consists from one parachute (most probably for stabilization) and 3-4 reactive thrusters that are located between said parachute and vehicle
Thrusters are activated only in the end of the fall, so vehicle is mostly falling (thus becoming harder target for AA weapons)

France also tried to do something like that, but after initial test ended up with death of vehicle crew they stopped the project.
 

Jodan

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Mar 18, 2009
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i could have sworn he said FARMERS CORE. witch would be far less exiting. or would it....
 

Mydnyght

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Feb 17, 2010
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Okay, why did the name of "Armoured Core" remind me of this from Demolition Man:

EDIT:

By the way...
"Well, I couldn't decide what weapons to bring, so I just brought ALL of them"

Graham, you sound as though you've visited TV Tropes recently. To quote the page about the 'Crazy Prepared' trope:

"Some very professional players deliberately use overweighted ACs loaded with every weapon for any situations in Arenas, and eject any unnecessary weapons when the fight begins, depending on the enemy."

I mean, I'm just saying.
 

Punch You

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Dec 12, 2010
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I have to say, for a smaller company like From Software, that was an incredibly good looking intro movie.

Still made no sense, other than "look at all the different robot parts you can play with!"
 

shiajun

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Jun 12, 2008
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Seriously, that cutscene makes no sense. It goes form image to image wihtout any coherent idea, and then dialogues that seem stiched together from various conversations. *sigh*
 

5-0

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Apr 6, 2010
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Not sure why but this was one of the funniest ones you've done. Probably cause the game seems so stoooopid.
 

Don Reba

Bishop and Councilor of War
Jun 2, 2009
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A bit of nitpicking.

You know, if we have mechs, I'd like to think we've passed the point when we have gynormous gears.

Those are not gears, but spools for the cables pulling the machine up. Besides, the alternative to gears would be to have an electric motor on each moving part, which makes sense for cars, but not too many other applications.

Now, I'm just spit-balling here, but why don't we try armouring everything, instead of just the core?

Because armour weights a lot ? quite important for air drops.

So, actual battle-ready mechs is not something we are going to be able to achieve for a long time, but tanks with jets? We could do that now!

Could we? F-35 Raptor produces up to 186 kN of thrust, which is enough to lift about 19 tons. An Abrams tank weights over 60 tons ? it would need the thrust of 3 bombers just for rocket-assisted descent. This, not even counting the weight of additional fuel or engines themselves.
 

Azhrarn-101

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Jul 15, 2008
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Don Reba said:
A bit of nitpicking.

So, actual battle-ready mechs is not something we are going to be able to achieve for a long time, but tanks with jets? We could do that now!

Could we? F-35 Raptor produces up to 186 kN of thrust, which is enough to lift about 19 tons. An Abrams tank weights over 60 tons ? it would need the thrust of 3 bombers just for rocket-assisted descent.
A bit of nitpicking on the nitpicking. ;)

You only need a lot of thrust for a very short time. Also, you don't need to be able to lift the mass of the whole tank, just slow it down enough to stop it from damaging itself when it hits the tarmac.

Both are possible with solid state rocket engines. You could easily eject those once you hit the ground (as you wouldn't need them after that), and solid rockets generate a TON of thrust for their size and mass.

It wouldn't be the most pleasant of landings for the crew, and there would be risks (trigger them to early and you plummet the last bit, trigger them to late and you won't slow down enough to not destroy your tanks suspension on impact), but it could work.
 

Aardvaarkman

I am the one who eats ants!
Jul 14, 2011
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Why are they so obsessed with Air Conditioning units? Is this part of a larger war strategy? Take away their cooling, and then they will surrender! I would have thought taking out the military units would make more sense.
 

Darth_Payn

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Aug 5, 2009
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5-0 said:
Not sure why but this was one of the funniest ones you've done. Probably cause the game seems so stoooopid.
Indeed. The cutscene by itself utterly failed to establish stuff like plot, characters, setting, and why we should care, beyong BIG DAMN MECHSPLOSIOOOOOOOOOOONS!!! Should i have played the 1st 4 to get it?
And good job guys, your jokes this week were brilliant!

captcha: DISH Fall Sales Event
Is the event watching sattelite dishes dropped from a roof? I want to go to there.
 

BX3

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Mar 7, 2011
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"Why did you miss?"
Graham: "I'm sorry?!"

That one's going in the big vault of best lines from Unskippable. So simple, but I laughed my ass off, even after rewinding it 4 times.
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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TheomanZero said:
Maybe Fran and Rosary are one person with multiple personalities? Is that the plot twist?
Damn it! I was going to say that!

...Anyway... I agree, screw the mechs, lets just go with the jet tanks.