What do women find attractive? (Men only)

Naeras

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Women love confidence, and that's probably the most important thing a man can have if they want female attention.

As for what body parts they find most important? From the women I know, I'd guess a nice ass. Other than that they seem to be very happy if someone decides "fuck it, let's go shirtless right now", so... yeah. They're not all that complicated.
 

Rawne1980

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Daystar Clarion said:
A sense of humour and confidence :D


A sense of humour indicates intelligence and wit, while the confidence is need to get that humour across.

Hey, it works for me :D
Well, you've got confidence at least (budum tish).

On Topic....

To get a women you just need a cloth that smells distinctly like chloroform.
 

WaysideMaze

The Butcher On Your Back
Apr 25, 2010
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Rawne1980 said:
To get a women you just need a cloth that smells distinctly like chloroform.
Women find the smell of chloroform attractive? That's my new aftershave sorted then.

O/T My manly beard and beergut. You know it's sexy.
 

Powereaver

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I got told once by a female friend that before you go out on a date you should exercise at the gym it gives you an attractive natural glow :D
 

Hagi

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Jonluw said:
What parts of a woman's body attracts (heterosexual) men has never been much of a mystery. There are for the most part fairly clearly defined areas which men's sexuality fixate on. As society has been male-dominated through history, these aren't exactly secret, and considering that the escapist's userbase is mostly male (if the polls are to be believed), it's reasonable to assume that escapists at large have a decent understanding of what men find attractive.
The parts men fixate on are as much of a mystery as what women fixate on. The only complication is that just like not all men fixate on those things not all women do either. Except that for some mysterious reason in the case of women the exception disproves the rule whilst in the case of men the exception is ignored.

Women like exactly the sort of thing you see on the covers of romance books, male strip clubs and movies aimed squarely at women. They like abs, they like biceps, they like strong jaws.

Not every single one of them likes that. Just like not every single guy likes E-cup tits. But a whole lot of them surely do, otherwise such things wouldn't be featured as heavily in media as they are.

What parts of a man's body is it primarily that attracts (heterosexual) women though?
This is either not as clearly defined, or not as well known across the sexes.
In any case, that is why I've created this thread: To get input from the men of the community regarding what parts of the male body they think women find the most attractive or tend to fixate on.
It's perfectly well known. Abs, biceps and every other shallow thing you can think of. People just like to pretend women are innocent little creatures with no desire for the flesh. And every single exception is taken as proof of this.

The average women is every bit as shallow as the average man. And just like there's millions upon millions of men who have all kinds of varied tastes that differ from the standard norm there are also millions upon millions of women with all kinds of varied tastes that differ from the standard norm.

Why am I doing this?
Simple.
I've made another thread where I'm asking women basically the same question. Basically, this thread will contain your guesses, and that thread will contain the correct answers. It'll be interesting to see how they compare.
i.e. I want to see if men's assumptions about the sexier sex hold up.

So don't you guys dare go cheating by reading the girls' thread before posting here.
That other thread will not contain the correct answers. It will contain a handful of personal accounts of such an insignificantly small number that there's no way they can be counted as representative for women in general. On top of that the answers are publicly visible and linked to their accounts, meaning the posters will feel the need to censor their own posts due to that.

Whilst, certainly, threads like this can be highly amusing they have absolutely nothing to do with either truth, evidence or science.
 

DanielBrown

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Dec 3, 2010
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Triangular shape, height and general masculinity, perhaps?
I'm so glad I won the genetic lottery.

 

Spectral Dragon

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Be confident. Bitches love confidence.

Other than that, a lean body with some muscles - depends on the girl what muscles. And possibly intelligence, or just the good ol' fashioned gentleman - kind to her, willing to defend her, and to tag along on things she wants to do. Compliments with this, and you're good to go. And ask questions.

But the one thing, that pretty much everyone likes in a friend, lover, etc. is confidence.
 

x EvilErmine x

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Apr 5, 2010
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I think there was a study done about this very same topic a while ago. IIRC they found that the men tend find certain features of a woman attractive.
This trend was found to be fairly common in that men tended to find the same things attractive in a woman.

Where as when they surveyed the woman they found that there was a much brouder range of male features that were considered to be attractive

It's supposed to be some sort mechanism to aid female social co-operation way back when i.e. if they don't all have the same idea of attractiveness then they will not all be competing over the same mates and thus there will be less tension between individuals.
 

Sphinx86

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Well my current GF loves my butt.
I have a chick friend who loves shoulders/back.
An Ex also loved my butt, and my arms when I started to bulk a little. She's also mentioned being attracted to guy's eyes.

To be fair I think this question is probably aimed a little incorrectly and those guys who have said 'personality' (even though this isn't a strictly physical trait) probably have it down.

Now you can't generalise things for an entire gender, as there will always be outliers who don't fit, but on average I believe that most women prefer a personality over straight out looks. Now being good-looking isn't going to hurt and every women is going to differ in the type of personality they like but I think women will (again on average) forgive a man's looks more when he has a good personality, than a man would when the situation is reversed.

I distinctly remember that an article I read years ago about the sexual fantasies held by men and women summarised that men's fantasies were more physically based (two women - twice the boobies - yay) whereas women's were more emotionally based (a man that I never have to see again - therefore don't have to worry about being judged and can let myself go wild - yay).

In the end I have the current belief that most of the gender troubles we have are based in the physicality/visuality of men versus the emotionality of women. This is why I hold that anyone who argues porn is destructive for relationships, should also agree that Romantic Comedies are also - they give an unrealistic portrayal of what a relationship is.
 

Sphinx86

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Hagi said:
Whilst, certainly, threads like this can be highly amusing they have absolutely nothing to do with either truth, evidence or science.
While I agree that its not exactly scientific and given that essentially this and the other thread are only polling a specific genre (?? - is that the right term? class maybe? tribe? you get the picture) you aren't going to get a valid cross-section of women in general. Though you are going to get an answer that would probably interest the type of men that hang out here - us all being essentially gamer geeks.

I have to disagree about your truth statement though. I doubt any women who bothers to answer is going to say something like 'arse' when they really mean 'eyes'.
Any women that says 'only personality matters' is definitely kidding themselves though. While as per my previous post I say it matters more, if a girl had to pick between an ugly guy and an ok guy where there was no other difference, ok guy would win every time. Well maybe not every, every but statistically relevantly every as possible.
 

Hagi

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Sphinx86 said:
Hagi said:
Whilst, certainly, threads like this can be highly amusing they have absolutely nothing to do with either truth, evidence or science.
While I agree that its not exactly scientific and given that essentially this and the other thread are only polling a specific genre (?? - is that the right term? class maybe? tribe? you get the picture) you aren't going to get a valid cross-section of women in general. Though you are going to get an answer that would probably interest the type of men that hang out here - us all being essentially gamer geeks.

I have to disagree about your truth statement though. I doubt any women who bothers to answer is going to say something like 'arse' when they really mean 'eyes'.
Any women that says 'only personality matters' is definitely kidding themselves though. While as per my previous post I say it matters more, if a girl had to pick between an ugly guy and an ok guy where there was no other difference, ok guy would win every time. Well maybe not every, every but statistically relevantly every as possible.
Even in that case.

That other thread is going to get what? A 100 replies? 200?

How many gamer girls do you think there are? There's millions of them. 250 replies, at maximum, on a public forum, with all the flaws that come with that, isn't going to give you any insight whatsoever in what those millions of girls want.

And everybody twists their answers that will be viewable publicly slightly to be more acceptable. Everybody does it, it's a group instinct. The amount of adaptation may vary from individual to individual, some telling you exactly what they think you want to hear whilst other give you essentially their own opinion worded in such a way to best match the public. But nobody is ever speaking their mind directly, even when speaking in great anger or some other emotion there's always some adaptation happening to fit better into the group. That's what humans do.
 

Jonluw

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Danyal said:
And I thought you had learned a lesson...

Jonluw said:
I know now that I shall not try making threads with directions more complicated than "post about vaguely what I ask you in this thread".
Lesson learned.
:p
I was filled with a sudden burst of optimism, it seems.
Still: this went better than the conversion thread.
 

Jonluw

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Hagi said:
It's perfectly well known. Abs, biceps and every other shallow thing you can think of. People just like to pretend women are innocent little creatures with no desire for the flesh. And every single exception is taken as proof of this.

The average women is every bit as shallow as the average man. And just like there's millions upon millions of men who have all kinds of varied tastes that differ from the standard norm there are also millions upon millions of women with all kinds of varied tastes that differ from the standard norm.
Whilst, certainly, threads like this can be highly amusing they have absolutely nothing to do with either truth, evidence or science.
You shouldn't take this as an attempt at real science. It's just a fun experiment I wanted to do with the escapist community to see what guys actually think is attractive to women.

The reason I'm doing this is that I recently remembered being complimented on my back by a couple of girls. This took me by surprise because 1. Who notices someone's back as a sexy attribute? (Of course, I've later found out why), and 2. I have a bit of an acne problem.

Of course most men are aware of the standard answers such as "abs, pecs, butts, strong jaw, etc.", but I figured there was a chance some bodypart might pop up which I hadn't expected, such as the back in my own experience. Thighs or something. I dunno. And it would be highly amusing to see the entire man-thread completely ignore this bodypart while it was mentioned frequently in the women's thread.
 

Sphinx86

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Hagi said:
Even in that case.

That other thread is going to get what? A 100 replies? 200?

How many gamer girls do you think there are? There's millions of them. 250 replies, at maximum, on a public forum, with all the flaws that come with that, isn't going to give you any insight whatsoever in what those millions of girls want.

And everybody twists their answers that will be viewable publicly slightly to be more acceptable. Everybody does it, it's a group instinct. The amount of adaptation may vary from individual to individual, some telling you exactly what they think you want to hear whilst other give you essentially their own opinion worded in such a way to best match the public. But nobody is ever speaking their mind directly, even when speaking in great anger or some other emotion there's always some adaptation happening to fit better into the group. That's what humans do.
I don't think the OP intended for this to be a serious scientific study worthy of writing a paper into a journal. If I remember correctly they even stated this was more to gauge whether what guys thought girls liked actually matched what girls actually liked. An interesting conversation to have rather than the be all and end all of male-female relations.

Now by the definition of where the OP is asking it will only apply to a distinct sub-culture of the community, actually possibly a sub-sub-culture, or sub-sub-sub-culture depending on how those things are categorised. I'm pretty sure an anthropologist, or psychologist or someone could even list the traits that this community shares - which is where I was coming from with the 'answers the guys here would like to know' point. Even if all the girls here said 'butts' (using my post as an example) it could only apply to gamers chicks, whereas sports chicks might prefer abs, and adventurer chicks might prefer arms. This is not in doubt, but I reckon the guys here would be more interested in the gamer opinion therefore the conversation is still valid.

Finally I can't argue that people will put on a certain level of spin on comments they make, but my experience on The Escapist is that most people are grown up enough to be OK with differences (and even celebrate them) which would mitigate that factor. That said I get the feeling that your comments are less 'realistic' and more 'cynical' which means I doubt that I would convince you of anything. I'll freely admit though that without all the verbal and physical clues that I would get from a face-to-face conversation I could be projecting from experiences I have had in the real world and you are in fact open-minded but hold an opposing point of view.
 

Your once and future Fanboy

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Feb 11, 2009
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Well, the obvious is that different women find different things attractive.
Just as some men dislike flat-chested girls while some dislike big chested girls.

But with most women it's not the looks themselves that make a man attractive.
Women more then men have more attraction to specific types, and that's more in the sence of the man as a whole. The attitude, the body language, the clothing style, the personality, the flaws and the body.
The types (almost stereotype, especially when it comes to fictional characters) like the wounded soul that needs love, the wildboy who needs to be tamed, the quiet intravert who you can get to open up, etc.

You especially see this when talking to girld who are very into David Tenant or Nightcrawler, they focus more on the style and personality than their looks (that plays a factor also, of course). Note that Im just using these as examples, mostly because of their popularity.

...and men are of course interested in personality and that stuff too. but what we find attractive is often much easier to quantify.
I personally really like the manicly happy girls, you the type that makes you smile...
Yes I want to find my own Pinkamina Diane Pie.

EDIT: Im Bisexual, so Im not sure if my comment really counts if you don't want to hear from any women (or people who are interested in men in general).
 

Hagi

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I'm not saying this conversation isn't valid, useful or amusing. Nor am I implying that anyone who's replied is using this thread as a real scientific study.

This thread has a perfectly valid purpose of entertainment and curiosity. But it shouldn't be mistaken for actual applicable knowledge. And, this being the internet, someone is going to go "well I read this thing on the internet..." which I hope to reduce with my reply.

It's just one of these things that annoy me, so I write a reply to hopefully reduce the number of people who take this thread as serious scientific research (and yes, this being the internet means those people are also here on the escapist. Not that many, I'll admit. But they're here).

So, through sheer peer-pressure (of which I, unfortunately, apply but little) I attempt to get others, who need it, to get a bit more cynical on information they read.

Likely a futile effort, but one that still feels worthy of the effort.
 

Nerexor

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Mar 23, 2009
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The way I've always heard it is that looks function as "the audition" for women. They'll approach you[footnote]Oh wait, they won't. Guys are socially required to do all the work of putting themselves out there, which is lame as all hell in my opinion.[/footnote] based on looks, but they'll stay (or run to the hills) based on your personality. Granted part of the looks part will also be how you present yourself. You could be Johnny Depp but if you don't take care of yourself (ungroomed, unflattering clothes) and don't look/act confident (submissive posturing, eyes down, avoiding contact, etc...) then you still won't have much luck.

As to which parts I think they find attractive, I assume it's the same as for guys: the obvious ones. You can't exactly scope out a dude's endowments[footnote]Unless something is very wrong with their fashion choices[/footnote] so you go with what you can see: chest, arms, butt. Most guys clothes make it difficult to see much of the legs, whereas shirts still generally give a good idea of whats underneath unless they're baggy as all get out. I don't get the fixation on butts though... Then again, even with women I don't find it to be a big deal.