what will happen to your body after death?

Vern

New member
Sep 19, 2008
1,302
0
0
I'm going to go with cremation. I'd hate for my corpse to take up land, and if it's preserved in a casket six feet under ground it'll be hundreds of years before I'll leach into the soil to provide any nutrients. Plus it may take up valuable land, and I'd hate for people to be bitching decades from now about how a building project might unearth me. I also personally disagree with organ donation, because who the hell knows who might get my organs. I'm picky about the people I associate with on a social level, I know I'd like to pick who gets my organs. Yes, I'm a selfish bastard, but I don't like being generous so I can feel self-righteous. I'd rather just be burned down, and dumped out in a certain special place. And I know my brother would be more than willing to do this. That, or I've also thought of a pine coffin, they rot relatively quickly, and at least your body will provide nutrients for the soil. This whole grand coffin thing is ridiculous.
 

War Penguin

Serious Whimsy
Jun 13, 2009
5,719
0
0
Well, after all of my organs are released for donation, the rest of me will be launched out of a catapult and be shot by a flaming arrow, thus cremating my body.

Or go Viking style. The Vikings sure knew how to cater a funeral.

Either one works. As long as it's unnecessarily elaborate, I'm fine.
 

Blackvegie

New member
Nov 16, 2009
127
0
0
I'd get it stuffed and then hidden in an attic to scare the shit out of future generations of children.
 

latenightapplepie

New member
Nov 9, 2008
3,086
0
0
I'd prefer for my body harvested/exploited, cremated and then forgotten. But really, if my loved ones have any objections that I can't persuade them to drop before I die, they can decide what happens to my body.
 

tobi the good boy

New member
Dec 16, 2007
1,229
0
0
stuffed with poisons and nurotoxins, chopped up into a delicous meal and have it fed to my enemies, all except my brain which will be removed before hand and cryogenicly frozen to be put into a robot in the future ...
 

TriggerHappyAngel

Self-Important Angler Fish
Feb 17, 2010
2,141
0
0
they can have my good organs and they can throw the "garbage" away ... if there is an afterlife then my spirit is enough
 

T-Bone24

New member
Dec 29, 2008
2,339
0
0
Organs donated, cremated, then have my ashes thrown into the faces of my enemies.
 

Motti

New member
Jan 26, 2009
739
0
0
I want my body to either:
a) donate my body to medicine and science (it's not like I'm going to need it anymore, and letting it take up space instead is just retarded)
or (preferably this one):
b) shot into space
I like to think that thousands of years after my death, aliens will discover my skeleton and a war of some sort will start as a result.
 

MazzaTheFirst

New member
Jul 1, 2009
270
0
0
I want my body launched into space, so if I come back as a zombie and after a few billion years land on another habitual planet (or found by interstellar aliens) I can cause the zombie apocalypse. For them!

That or buried here and cause the zombie apocalypse here. That would be fine as well.
 

SonicKoala

The Night Zombie
Sep 8, 2009
2,266
0
0
Cremation for me - that way, I will remain on this planet and undoubtedly get resurrected by a wizard one day, at which point I will be invincible and go on to rule the world.
 

Dupeo

New member
Mar 10, 2009
128
0
0
This ties into my burial plans (if I have the money). I want an above ground crypt. I want the floor to be angled upward a little bit. I want to be put in a hearse. I want there to be speakers in the back instead of the coffin (there is no coffin involved in this burial). I want there to be an intensely bright white under glow and bright headlights on the hearse and smoke machines on the sides, in between the rear and front wheels. I want my body to be put in the driver's seat with a cigarette permanently glued between my teeth (with a computer chip in it set to self-ignite after 100 years. I want my left hand glued out the driver's window and my right hand glued to the top of the steering wheel. I want the hearse backed up into the crypt and bricks cemented in front of it (loosely so there are cracks between each one). Every year on my death day I want the car to automatically turn on (including lights and smoke machines) and blare some death punk (the Misfits, Koffin Kats, Necromantix,etc.) through the speakers between the hours of midnight and 1 AM. After one hundred years, the hearse will automatically turn on on Halloween, break through the weakened brick wall in front of it and cruise around the city at high speeds all on its own. My body will be in the front seat with the lit cigarette and the windows down so everyone can see how kickass this corpse. The smoke will be pouring out, the lights will be on and of course the music will be blaring. The play list for this momentous night will start with Bat out of Hell and then move to the familiar death punk and maybe some melodic death metal if there is time. After a night of terror and theatricality, the hearse will automatically carry me back to the crypt, the broken brick wall will be rebuilt the same way and the music will be played on my death day and after another hundred years there will be another night of terror. Hopefully by the time I die the technology will exist for a car to be able to drive itself around the city at high speeds without causing damage to pedestrians, cars or buildings.
 

Emilin_Rose

New member
Aug 8, 2009
495
0
0
When we die, our bodies become the grass, and the antelope eat the grass. And so, we are all connected, in the great circle of life.
 

Shoggoth2588

New member
Aug 31, 2009
10,250
0
0
Ho-ho-ho! Silly human, the immortal don't die!

[sorry]

OT: I don't care. In a video will [assuming I have time to prepare one] I will implore my surviving family to have my body disposed of in the least expensive way possibly and to, as Penn Jillette said, "Grieve in the way that makes you happy" because, "Funerals aren't for the Dead."

Cremate me in cardboard, let someone else scatter my ashes and whenever you eat Wonka Bars, Wonka Doughnuts or, drink Vanilla Coke: think of me!

Nothing lasts forever, including memories. We only know of the greatest paragons of history but, who was the head chef during the Garfield administration? What was the name of Leonardo De Vinci's next door neighbor? Those took me a while to come up with so I guess I don't really care but who does really?
 

Aesir23

New member
Jul 2, 2009
2,861
0
0
I want my organs to be taken for medical use (I'm not going to be using them when I'm dead.), cremated, have my ashes stuffed into an urn and placed in a wall at the local cemetery next to my paternal grandparents and (hopefully not for a long time) parents.

I wouldn't be opposed to a wooden box and a hole in the ground with a lovely granite tombstone, but I want to be close to my family.
 

Radelaide

New member
May 15, 2008
2,503
0
0
I'll be harvested and then shot out of a cannon. And my will will be decided by a guitar hero contest.