What's your favourite Yahtzee quote?

Aug 19, 2010
"... I mean,a gun that shoots shuriken and lightning, it can only be cooler if it had tits and was lit on fire.

"if you are an elf the dialogue goes:
Hello, you are an elf.
I guess if i'm human it goes:
Hello, you are an ASS-HOLE"


New member
Nov 28, 2010
So the baddies said to themselves, "Hey, the one guy who could threaten our operation is in a different country and isn't the slightest bit interested in our stupid conspiracy. F*** that, let's go shoot at him!"

FC Groningen

New member
Apr 1, 2009
"Burnout is a game that hates players with a passion. If it was facist dictator it would build concentration camps for players and what's more, he would lay every brick personally with a mixture of cement and his own blood, that's how much he hates you."

"The day that I spend 70 Australian Dollars on an expansion pack, is the day that I swallow razorwire, pull the end out of my ass and floss myself to death".

"It's like a prototype human was putting the finishing touch on his wheel when a mammoth charged right at him. Left with no choice, he jumped on the wheel down the valley to safety. Yes, life was tough in Thatcher's Britain, but do you know what would make life hard? When the wheel, the valley and the mammoth would subsequently explode.


New member
Nov 29, 2010
All games are about realizing a fantasy, whether it be the fantasy about being a courageous war hero, or the fantasy about being a future space adventurer, or in the case of some Japanese games, the fantasy of possessing eight prehensile dicks.

Umbrella Chronicles is a heavily cut down retread of the major Resident Evil games staring Johnny Bravo, a prostitute, an idiot, a mullet, a nine year old boy, a brick shithouse, and Carlos.

What would you get if you took the corpse of J.R.R Tolkein, ground it into a fine powder and snorted it off the doughy breast of a prostitute suffering from Tourettes Syndrome? Well first you'd get a throat full of dead writer, then the police would probably want to talk to you and you'd no doubt make an enemy of Mrs. Tolkein. What you won't get is The Witcher, because it's a video game and more easily available from your local electronics retailer you idiot.

Just because you can doesn't mean you should. I can use the syringe to replace the filling of a Cantebury Creme Egg with Branston Pickle, but it wouldn't be a good idea. At least i don't think so... hold that thought. *End Credits* No it really isn't.

It stands for "Heroic Airmen Wax Xenophobically."

As Thomas you can shoot more accurately, throw lassos, and climb ledges. As Ray you can open the pause menu, select "Restart Mission" and chose Thomas instead you fucking idiot.

It just goes to show, never stick your dick in a pudding. It might still be good pudding and you can spend all day explaining it but nobody is going to eat it because you STUCK YOUR DICK IN IT!!

"From Adam's stern expression, constant swearing, and repeated kicks to my head and stomach i could tell he must have been upset about something." And of course the "WILL YOU FUCKING EMOTE" text during that little animation.

I guess a recommendation for Limbo depends entirely on whether you feel a game can be carried entirely by apocalyptic despair.

A lot of the game can be summed up with the phrase "Modern Warfare Modern Warfare cluck cluck gibber gibber hello bang dead."

The set-up is agreeably uncomplicated. Humans tasty, lets eat them all. Yum yum.

Completely sublime from start to finish, and i swear i will jam forks in my eyes if i ever use those words to describe anything ever again. I know it's not funny to love a game, but FUCK YOU! Portal is awesome and if you don't think so you must be STUPID.

The Floating Nose

New member
Dec 5, 2010
In the 50 Cent game video :"As i was reading in my web journal....i refuse to use the word blog because it sounds like something that lives in the river bed and communicates through farts."


New member
Nov 18, 2009
'.. which is a bit like trying to have you cake and eat it too.
Although I have never understood that saying if you had a cake why wouldn't you eat it?
Unless you we're a stripper and you wanted to jump out of it...

... sorry lost my train of thought there.'


New member
Aug 20, 2009
"it shoots shurikens and lightning! the only way it could be more awesome if it where to have tits and was on fire!"

Geeky Anomaly

New member
Feb 19, 2011
"The way Jeremy Clarkson inspires animalistic lust."


"So those dirty console gaming peasants don't ruin things for the glorious PC gaming master race."


New member
Apr 2, 2010
hitman555z said:
i dont remember the quote exactly, but he said something like "as the ___ says/said/ses to the ___ wheres the fucking point?"

anyone know where thats from? its been bothering me for a long time now lol
I'm not sure which video but the quote goes something like

"Just like the leper says to his mistress, 'Where's the fucking point'?"