Not by choice though.
I could always claim to be asexual, be all edgy and stuff but that would be untrue.
I had always "well if you're at the age of __ and never had any, you can always go to a prostitute" in the back of my head until I actually tried it and found that I couldn't even bring myself to do that.
That was when I lost any hope, became even more depressive and finally died on the inside.
There's a very poignant pain in my chest sometimes when the lovelessnes of my existence surfaces every once on a while and I am full of endless "what if" scenarios, mostly about "what if I was less like me. If only I was less like me" because as I am now, I factually can't have a relationship.
I wouldn't want to date me, well, I don't even know what that entails, lots of "unwritten rules", nonverbal communication etc., lots of invisible minefields for my big, massive foot to
So as of now, the odds are stacked in favor of everything staying the way it is. As usual.
Anything else you wanna know, buddy? :]