Why does death change public opinion so drastically?

[Craorach]

People don't like to speak ill of the dead. Its daft, to be honest, and prevents us from truely facing the causes of their death all to often.. such as the example of the teenagers crashing. People do not magically become good people when they die, but there is a percieved unfairness in simply telling the truth whey they cannot defend themselves. My arguement will forever be that some actions do not need defending.

Cases of suicide are abit different however.. what we have in that case is guilt. People feel bad for tormenting the example in the OP, they want the world around them to forget how badly they treated him, they want to forget it themselves. Some part of them believes that if they just repeat their lies often enough they become true, because he's not there to argue with them.

 

[Mozza444]

I agree.
Also, please enjoy this joke.. courtesy of Sickipedia.

-Have you ever noticed that it's only 'perfect' people who are murdered or killed in horrific accidents?
"He was the perfect son" or "She was the perfect daughter."
"Such a tragic accident they were the perfect family."
"They died together, the perfect couple till the end."
Makes me glad I abuse my kids and beat up my wife.
Kind of makes me immortal.-

 

[LostTimeLady]

I had wondered this before.
It's not right to speak ill of the dead but there's a difference between saying something nice and having a drastic U-turn of opinion about someone. I found this when Micheal Jackson died. Before his death he got so much flack for everything and was the medias go-to punch bag but after he died there was a complete U-turn and not even so much as an acknowledgment that what they had said previously was wrong, no they just said nice things instead which comes off as deceteful.

I definately agree, speaking ill of the dead isn't right and hurtful to those close to the person who died but people can see through things and sometimes it might be better to say nothing (or simply 'I'm sorry for your loss') and let the people who knew and loved them get on with griving than being nice for the sake of being nice. Again, I say, in my opinion.

 

[Johnny Impact]

Everyone's a hero but only some of us get to be an hero.

Oh yes. I went there.

I don't understand this phenomenon at all. It could be to preserve the feelings of grieving family. It could be superstition that it's bad luck to speak ill of the dead. It isn't anything I would ever do. The most a dead asshole could ever get from me is silence.

I remember when Kurt Cobain killed himself. Suddenly he was "the spokesman for a generation." As it was *MY* generation he supposedly spoke for I was extremely pissed off to hear this. I have seen T-shirts of the man with angel wings airbrushed behind him. Made me want to vomit. Cobain wasn't any kind of spokesman or hero. He was a moderately talented white trash druggie loser who offed himself because he couldn't handle success. Angel wings?? If there is a heaven, then there is also a hell, and Cobain is roasting there right now, because if you read your Bible you know that's where suicides go. (Go ahead, fanboys, let me have all the flame you got. Heard all your arguments before. And no, I'm not a Christian, I just expect Christians to have a little knowledge of their own faith.)

If I found out right this second that the guys who bullied me in school all got some kind of horrible disease and died screaming in puddles of their own shit I'd be completely okay with that. No force in this world or any other could make me say they were valuable human beings -- or, for that matter, human beings at all.

I have no sympathy for suicides. None. I firmly believe it is a right all human beings have to end their own lives. If you can't hack it anymore, get the hell off this planet. It requires a great deal more from a person to keep living. Before you kill yourself, understand this: if you do it, the bad guys win.

Dying does not make a person special. It's the one thing absolutely all of us will do. It does not entitle us to having our histories rewritten.

I don't have a good answer for you, buddy. It's just another stupid thing people do.

 

[kaioshade]

Death is an event to be carried with humility and grace.

People do not become saints upon death, but repeating any flaws in that person is often misconstrued as reveling in the death of that person. And I like to think we have progressed past the barbarian stage that we take pleasure in the passing of another.

 

[TheSaw]

Spoiler: Foamy talks about Death (obviously NSFW)

And I honestly don't know why death changes opinion, it doesn't for me.
If someone is prick to me, and he dies I'm not going change my mind and think he's a swell guy.

 

[Harrowdown]

The fact that he killed himself highlights the anger and bitterness behind the comments he made, and leads to people feeling guilty for not being on his side.

 

[rutger5000]

It's weak to speak your mind about a death person, if you didn't do that while the person was alive. So I guess people over compensate.
Also the death of someone in ones surroundings can cause one to reflect upon oneself. But that does not always lead to a honest or true statement.
But mostly it is about peoples fear of their own death. One day everyone dies, and for most people they'll only continue to exist in the way people remember them. Of course people want to be remembered in a positive way, even if they don't deserve it. So people speak good about the death who don't deserve it, in the hope that someone will return the favor.
I'm little different, I respect the death. People who I didn't like have died, when people ask me about them I keep silent. I won't lie, but I won't speak my mind either. (Historical people are exluded from this).

 

[SilentCom]

It sounds like people are trying to cover up for having bullied the guy who committed suicide. It is called guilt and people get scared that they may have been the reason why it happened. People tend to blame themselves when death happens. They just don't want anyone else to think they are responsible.

 

[rutger5000]

Everyone's a hero but only some of us get to be an hero.

Oh yes. I went there.

I don't understand this phenomenon at all. It could be to preserve the feelings of grieving family. It could be superstition that it's bad luck to speak ill of the dead. It isn't anything I would ever do. The most a dead asshole could ever get from me is silence.

I remember when Kurt Cobain killed himself. Suddenly he was "the spokesman for a generation." As it was *MY* generation he supposedly spoke for I was extremely pissed off to hear this. I have seen T-shirts of the man with angel wings airbrushed behind him. Made me want to vomit. Cobain wasn't any kind of spokesman or hero. He was a moderately talented white trash druggie loser who offed himself because he couldn't handle success. Angel wings?? If there is a heaven, then there is also a hell, and Cobain is roasting there right now, because if you read your Bible you know that's where suicides go. (Go ahead, fanboys, let me have all the flame you got. Heard all your arguments before. And no, I'm not a Christian, I just expect Christians to have a little knowledge of their own faith.)

If I found out right this second that the guys who bullied me in school all got some kind of horrible disease and died screaming in puddles of their own shit I'd be completely okay with that. No force in this world or any other could make me say they were valuable human beings -- or, for that matter, human beings at all.

I have no sympathy for suicides. None. I firmly believe it is a right all human beings have to end their own lives. If you can't hack it anymore, get the hell off this planet. It requires a great deal more from a person to keep living. Before you kill yourself, understand this: if you do it, the bad guys win.

Dying does not make a person special. It's the one thing absolutely all of us will do. It does not entitle us to having our histories rewritten.

I don't have a good answer for you, buddy. It's just another stupid thing people do.

All I want to say is that Christianity is a whole lot more then the Bilbe. You're an idiot if you think every Christian follows the bible word for word. And no I'm not a Christian, but yes I have read the Bible.

 

[Zoe Castillo]

---

 

[LaughingAtlas]

I'm sure someone's going to post that one Bug comic here soon...
I think it's one of those knee-jerk reactions people are usually content to not worry about.
"God, I hate that guy! Oh, he died? Bless his soul, he was such a good person."
A fear of public opinion, perhaps, same reason men who don't shave thier faces (and, I think, women who don't shave their everything) are evidently seen as unclean deviants and murderous psychotics, at least here in the States. Not doing what everyone else does, reason be damned, either makes some insecure folk feel threatened or genuinely looks like a warning sign for bomber/shooter/mugger/rapist/bank robber about to happen. Do not fear, fear is the mind killer.

Another theory: people want nice things said about them when they've passed and figure the best way to do that is at least pretend to like everyone who has ever died rather than, say, being a good person in their own lives.

One more: maybe death makes people feel something (anger, sorrow, mirth, compassion, etc.) and emotions can make people do a lot of stupid things, like forget what caused them to be cross with someone when that person no longer lives. Not saying you should hold a grudge, but acting as though people who force dogs to kill eachother for their fun and profit were pure-hearted animal lovers rings a bit insincere.

 

[similar.squirrel]

Guilt, coupled with the automatic reverence we have for corpses.

 

[JMeganSnow]

Dying does not make a person special. It's the one thing absolutely all of us will do. It does not entitle us to having our histories rewritten.

I don't have a good answer for you, buddy. It's just another stupid thing people do.

Personally, I think a lot of people may do this sort of rewriting of history thing to erase any feelings of guilt they might have toward the person who is now dead. It provides them with closure and they don't have to think about it any more. Some people seem to be better at this kind of self-delusion than others, but I'm pretty sure they exist because I run across people all the time where I think, how can you not know what a jerk you're being? Do you *really* think that the universe revolves around you?

How nice it must be to live a perfect life where *everything* is somebody else's fault and you never have any reason for self-criticism.

 

[wfpdk]

people just feel that they must respect the dead for some reason. they think that there is an afterlife, it's bad luck to dance on graves, and it's not cool to eat the deceased, why? no reason past superstition and taboos. but that's just the way the cookie crumbles.

 

[KingsGambit_v1legacy]

It's a faux pas to speak ill of the dead. That does not extend to genuinely evil people and tyrants for example, but for most people, in death we forgive them their minor wrongs.

 

[Loonerinoes]

Because people love a narrative, as based on their personal biases, to fill their heads with delusions. Even if that narrative is, in fact, wholly inconsistent with the truth.

 

[InfiniteSingularity]

It's the sad, sad truth of why so many young people resort to suicide

You get more respect in death than in life

 

[WyndWalker02]

I've always been rather annoyed by this as well. Perfect example was Michael Jackson. Now, I have no idea how the man actually thought or lived his life, but for the accusations about kiddie problems, he was absolutely demonized and considered a horrible human being. As soon as he died, the media went absolutely bat-crap crazy with articles and videos and news reports about his legacy and his achievements and his talent. It was as if the moment he'd died, everyone magically forgot that they'd hated him just a few weeks prior to that.

Spoiler: NSFW

EDIT: Spelling errors annoy me.