You are going to be assassinated

ThatLankyBastard

New member
Aug 18, 2010
1,885
0
0
Canada
-re-writ Twilight so Edward dies at the end of the first book...
-Torn limb-from-limb by millions of angry fangirls, (and 3 fanboys)
 

shadyh8er

New member
Apr 28, 2010
1,778
0
0
bleachigo10 said:
shadyh8er said:
bleachigo10 said:
-USA
-Broke Glenn Beck's chalkboard
-Decapitated in a sword fight with Morgan Freeman
I assume your what is directed at the sword fight with Morgan Freeman thing. Well I want to die in a sword fight and I also want to meet Morgan Freeman before I die. I'd be killing two birds with one stone.
Oooooooooh. Makes sense now.
 

Infernai

New member
Apr 14, 2009
2,605
0
0
-Australia
-Kidnapped and Forced the Entire Labor Government to watch the Star Wars Holiday Special until they went insane
-Killed in a sword fight against a tag team of Hideo Kojima and Sean Connery (i'll have two swords while they both have one to even things out), who were on vacation in the country at the time and had it interrupted by the incident stated above.
 

Marter

Elite Member
Legacy
Apr 3, 2020
14,276
15
43
Canada
Killing my stepfather
Killing myself before anyone else gets that honour.
 

londelen

New member
Apr 15, 2009
408
0
0
USA
-Used critical thinking
-the CIA incites mobs of hardcore leftists and hardcore rightists to lynch me.
 

MrSmish

New member
Oct 27, 2009
37
0
0
thahat said:
-the netherlands

-declare that i dont like windmills

-stoned to death by having clogs thrown at me till i die.
So you will be clogged?...

Anyway.

France
Saying truly horrible things about France. Being of French desent, it will be considered an act of treason.
I will be French'd *wink* to death. They will finally find some balls...Fuckin' pussies...
 

harv3034

New member
Sep 23, 2010
224
0
0
-USA
-Set of nukes in the 10 biggest cities in the States (including DC) and leaking top secret defence plans (w/ command codes) to the approching Russian Invasion before fleaing the country for a Spetznaz safehouse in Hamburg, Germany.
-Seeing as America is now under Russian controle (thanks to me), what's left of the government gets Britain to enact their revenge. A team of highly trained British SAS Commandos approch the house under cover of darkness. After eliminating the Spetznaz Kill team assigned to protect me, they silently enter the house. Having "silenced" the house's other occupants, they breach my room (rousing me from my fitful sleep). Before I can reach for the heavy pistol under my pillow, they club me to the ground, beat me to within an inch of my life, and then put a single .45 caliber slug through my head.

EDIT: totaly worth it. America was in the shitter before I came alonge. The Russians will do a MUCH better job.
And if they don't... then my secret clone army repeats the process until...
A) things actually work out the way I planed
or
B) there are no more nations or people left on Earth
 

Trivun

Stabat mater dolorosa
Dec 13, 2008
9,831
0
0
Country: UK
Crime: Engaging in creative activities revolving around the satire and parody of the government. Books, comics, films, whatever.
Punishment: Since I'm typing this while on the toilet, I'd be killed in a Pratchett-esque way - by having a red-hot poker shoved up through the toilet... :p. Failing that they can just send Bond after me...
 

Saulkar

Regular Member
Legacy
Sep 18, 2020
3,142
2
13
Country
Canuckistan
Country Canada
Crime: Revealed that the Priminister is a puppet.
Assination attempt: They try to poison me with an allergenic unit that I lied about being vulnerable to. Bwahahahaha!
 

Hman121

New member
Feb 26, 2009
557
0
0
U.S, Jersey Shore area

Killed cast of Jersey Shore
Stole all hair gel and fake tanning supplies
Shutdown all clubs in which fistpumping is endorsed

Get attacked by Jersey mob, famous last words, "Come get me, bro."
 

MassiveGeek

New member
Jan 11, 2009
1,213
0
0
chstens said:
MassiveGeek said:
- Sweden
- I killed about a hundred idiots with a sniper rifle from the royal castle's roof.
- A really hot assassin would come after me, and we would have really awesome sex before she shot me between the eyes in my sleep.

... I don't know. XD
Are you the Laser Man?
That would be weird, considering I'm 17 years old and female.
 

Latinidiot

New member
Feb 19, 2009
2,216
0
0
Holland
- I killed the Rpyal family to reignite the flame of the Republic that so long ago was the banner of the united low lands.

-