You are the last person on Earth

PsychicTaco115

I've Been Having These Weird Dreams Lately...
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Mar 17, 2012
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I know the internet will go down some time in the near future

I'll have to die in the greatest way possible...

Fap myself to death. I'll die a happy man
 

Lucane

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Mar 24, 2008
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game-lover said:
I'd probably mostly eat. And read some books. It's all I could truly do.

No one to run the networks for TV. Or theaters for the movies I wanna watch. Maybe steal a bicycle. Best way to get around. Can't drive yet. No one to teach me now.

With no people to run most of the good stuff, I wouldn't be getting to have much fun, I imagine.
The hardest part about driving is oddly enough other drivers[After that seeing over the dashboard.]

If the roads are clean enough you could probably find a owner's manual in glovebox to read about the various controls and then just keep it under 15mph and you shouldn't get to banged up hitting things as long as they don't cut/scrap along the bottom of the vehicle sturdy and small/narrow like a metal pole or a corner of a building more likely to damage on impact than the flat side of a wall or bumper of another car. Just be sure to turn off the engine if you go to a pump to add gas if there's a leak you don't know about or spill it's a moderate longshot that the gasoline fumes could be ignited by the running engine in the moments you're fueling up the vapors if not spilled won't remain long otherwise (again that's a longshot of unless the car has flaming exhaust.)

Captha: words of wisdom
spooky.
 

RedDeadFred

Illusions, Michael!
May 13, 2009
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SmashLovesTitanQuest said:
Cry.

Cry some more.

Kill myself.
Pretty much this. To know that everyone I have ever cared about is gone and that there is no chance for me to meet anyone else would be overwhelmingly depressing.

I would have one very sad last day. I would drive to a trail that leads to Mt. Edith in the Rocky Mountains (about a two hour drive) and then proceed to hike up the mountain. I would take some family photo albums with me as well as some food and a large amount of Maple Whiskey. Once I got to the top, I would sign my name in the log book (it's a book that's kept under a small pile of rocks that climbers can sign their names in) and then enjoy the view while sitting on the edge of a rather sheer drop. I would get extremely drunk while looking over my family albums and then finally store the albums in the rock shelter with the log book. Finally I would say goodbye to the world and jump.

What a depressing thread. I'm sad just thinking about this...
 

TecnoMonkey

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Jul 2, 2012
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Although I am somewhat antisocial and hard to make friends with I would cry from loneliness, then after a day or two loot every video game that I could find (along with some food), and play on and on until the electricity runs out, then... I would probably leave my house with the sun burning my eyes and go explore the world around me with no restrictions, I guess. Chances are I would eventually kill myself though.
 

Olas

Hello!
Dec 24, 2011
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Fappy said:
I would go forth and collect ALL OF THE CATS!

The "Cat King" they shall call me... well, that's what future generations of nu-men will call me. Men that evolve from cats!

Khajiit!
All I can think about when I read this is...


The King of Cats
[a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_19638_6-insane-batman-villains-you-wont-see-in-movies.html"]The 6th most insane Batman villain ever[/a]

I'm so very sorry

Btw, how do you make your avatar do that? Because that's awesome.
 

Fappy

\[T]/
Jan 4, 2010
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OlasDAlmighty said:
Fappy said:
I would go forth and collect ALL OF THE CATS!

The "Cat King" they shall call me... well, that's what future generations of nu-men will call me. Men that evolve from cats!

Khajiit!
All I can think about when I read this is...


The King of Cats
[a href="http://www.cracked.com/article_19638_6-insane-batman-villains-you-wont-see-in-movies.html"]The 6th most insane Batman villain ever[/a]

I'm so very sorry

Btw, how do you make your avatar do that? Because that's awesome.
No idea. Ask Mud. He wrote the script for it ;P
 

DugMachine

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Apr 5, 2010
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Chicago Ted said:
DugMachine said:
Amusement parks with no lines. FUCK YEAH
This would work until you get into the park, sit down in the most extreme ride, then realize you need someone standing in the station to release the car onto the track. Then you realize that you also need that person standing there to release the restraints as well. The following three days will be a harrowing experience before death from either dehydration or exposure finally sets in...
True.. true. Okay I'll at least go to a waterpark I used to work for. I know how to operate and fix the rides woo
 

Prince Regent

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Dec 9, 2007
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Find some solar panels and a introduction to electrical engineering book.

After that I would try to find a military base and get a gun and a licence for midtown dear hunting.
 

GTwander

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Mar 26, 2008
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I would travel the states, breaking eyeglasses, and each time shouting;

"I thought I had TIME now!"
 

MeChaNiZ3D

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Aug 30, 2011
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I'd probably steal all the games I haven't played and sit around doing that until I died of not bothering to eat.

But assuming I have more self-motivation than that, I'd spend the rest of my life looking for another person (preferably female for reasons of species) because I wouldn't want to be the largest disappointment in human history by not finding the one chance to continue the human race. If I was absolutely sure there were no other people I'd salvage all the solar panels I could, get a few fridges, stockpile all the food I'd need, steal all the pomeranians from the pet stores along with all the dog biscuits (I do this in my APC that I've stolen), and then essentially play videogames and dick around for the rest of my life. Steal guns, shoot things, steal games, play them, steal cars, drive them around/off a cliff, steal clothes instead of washing them whenever I passed a store, etc. At some point probably move to Japan and do the same thing.

Or more concisely: Acquire renewable energy, acquire food, acquire pomeranians, dick around.
 

Anti-American Eagle

HAPPENING IMMINENT
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May 2, 2011
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Well i'd probably stock up on as much survival equipment as possible wander into the wild and become not just The Alpha of a pack of Dogs but become THE WOLF KING OF THE WORLD!
 

Arakasi

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Jun 14, 2011
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Alrighty then.
Initially it'd take me a while to realise eveyone is gone, say about 3 days.
When I do realise, I will cheer, finally being free from all responsibilities and people.
I would then spend several days stocking up on supplies, generators, food, water, petrol.
Freeze all perishable foods that I will really want later.
Once I'm all set up at home, with other people's stuff, I would start to venture out, specifically to get that one motorbike I really want from Newcastle.
After I got that I would venture out even more to loot more people's places, searching for some place to settle down for good.
After finding the apropriate mansion I would move all my stuff in there (including my dog).
Spend the rest of my days looting, watching DVD's, playing games, destroying shit, reading books, basically having any fun I can.
When I get too old to sustain myself anymore, go steal all the morphine I can find, and take it all at once while on the edge of a really tall building, then when the morphine starts to kick in, shoot myself in the head with a shotgun in a manner that will mean that I will fall off the building.
Better safe than sorry.
 

Marcus Kehoe

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Mar 18, 2011
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I hate cloning, but I'd find a way to make a human female clone, once perfected I would make an army of Olivia Wilde clones and repopulate the earth.

If that wouldn't work(it would) Then I would make war against the moon and remake the nation of equsetira with genetically engineered ponies.

If that fail's( possibly) I'd probably wright a book then travel to Vatican and poop in the pope's hat, no hate towards the pope but by that time i'd be out of thing;s to do.
 

mitchell271

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Sep 3, 2010
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Honestly, I'd go on a bit of destructive rampage. I have a few anger issues so being able to break anything I want to by whatever method I want to would be very therapeutic.
 

manaman

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Sep 2, 2007
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I would probably:

Spend several weeks doing every single thing I ever wanted to do that I can still do without other people around.

Get lonely and bored, and start talking to the probably by then several thousand cats and dogs I am feeding.

Devote the rest of my life to trying to build as convincing as possible A.I.

Spends my days curled up in a little ball, talking to the air, and yelling at all the hungry animals making noises outside my house.

Finish building that A.I. Only to realize several months later I didn't actually do so and am merely so mad that I can no longer tell reality from fantasy.

There would generally be a lot of masturbation, shooting guns, playing video games, and all that other fun stuff in between. I would probably be frantically trying to download all the porn before the internet grinds to a halt as there is nobody to maintain things.
 

silver wolf009

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Jan 23, 2010
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DugMachine said:
Amusement parks with no lines. FUCK YEAH
Get the string to rig the lever and away we go!

OT: Stockpile as much stuff as I would ever want. Establish lighting and generators. Move into my local mansion for fun. Get a working car and if needed, clear the roads. Then, go to the bookstore, and get as much as I can. Fill up backpacks, suitcases, SUVs, all that good stuff. Then download as much data as I can from the internet.

Then I start writing. About whatever I want to; myself, the world, history, transcriptions of classics, languages, stories of my own making, dreams. Leave behind books on how to translate or learn languages. Make caches of information, time capsules of sorts. Bury them and live life, leaving reminders for anything that might find them one day about what humanity was like.

Become the sole primary source for human history, and live to a comfortable age while I do it.

Also, start studying medicine. Don't want any breaks cutting me down before I'm done living life.
 

bigfatcarp93

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Mar 26, 2012
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I would finally be happy. No more normal people to annoy me. But wait... no more developers to make new video games... FUCK.
 

Josufu

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Jun 13, 2010
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I'd start by going back to bed and trying to catch up on my sleep. After that, who knows?