- May 26, 2009
of course not, just cut out that piece of colon with a tumor in it..Slayer_2 said:There's nothing wrong with keeping everything bottled up inside, right?
so this is a long one...i'll break it into spoiler sections
anyways, as for me..well, like a lot of people, death. i'm not afraid to die for people i care about, matter of fact i'd be proud to, the reason i want to join the military is so i can be strong enough to protect them, but i'm still scared shitless by it. i feel like..i dunno..i don't want to die for my country...i'd die defending it, but lets face it...only attack on US was Pearl Horbor. WW3 breaks out, you bet your ass i'm joining up, i'd never fight for my country, but i'd fight for the people in it, and die for the people in it. well..certain people.
compared to my fear of death....rejection. mostly in relationships. can't stand being shot down. i struggle with depression, and when i go for relationships, i try to put my entire heart into them for the long haul. when i get rejected or broken up with..i'm devistated for a long long time. went out with a girl for 4 years, she dumped me, was depressed for almost an entire year. more recently, went out with a girl for 2 months. broke up with me. depressed for 5 months.
being alone in life. i want kids, a wife, a house, a dog..but i've come to realize it might not happen, so i'm good with just my friends..
but what i'm mostly afraid of, is that when i do get depressed..i'd hurt somebody that's close to me again, and i might end up doing something...let's say..drastic? yeah...drastic...and perminant..
so to top it off...i don't have a bad life, horrid past, but my life now is fine. i have no reason to have these fears or struggle with depression. i just do. i know..pathetic, right? =P