Zero Punctuation: Medal of Honor Warfighter & Doom 3 BFG Edition

[Yahtzee Croshaw]

Medal of Honor Warfighter & Doom 3 BFG Edition

This week, Zero Punctuation reviews one shooter and one, well you'll see.

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[dragongit]

Ah, spunkgargleweewee. Or the SGWW Genre. Funny games critics panned look better in the light of crap like Warfighter.

 

[Okysho]

Spunkgargleweewee.

hilarity ensues...[not sarcastic]

Glad Yahtzee distinguished between the two shooting genres for the thickies...

 

[CopperBoom]

I come to this site for ONE person and just because I accidentally am here at the time when it is first posted I have to endure it not loading up and all these pop-up ads bork-ing the crappy computer I am on.

Let it be KNOWN World of Tanks that my interest has be diminished not raised by this "bombardment"!

...still waiting for it to come up... screen went dark and...

 

[OuendanCyrus]

Despite what everyone says about Doom 3 being a boring "Monster-closet-fest", I actually found it quite charming in a "This game is hilariously predictable way", and this is one of the few games I've played where the game spawns enemies behind you at any point while playing.

 

[Andy Shandy]

When he said "Gargle something else" I'll admit, I wasn't expecting another bottle of mouthwash to pop up.

And I believe Doorfighter PAHAHAHA should now be Medal Of Honor's official title.

 

[Darth Sea Bass]

I thought half life or half life 2 would have made it to the shooter list.

 

[gigastar]

Well, if thats the reaction that Medal of Honor got, id love to see what Yahtzee makes of Black Ops 2.

 

[Yopaz]

It's funny how people accuse him of not liking shooter when some of the games he give the most praise (Half-Life and Painkiller) are shooters.

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

I guess none of the titles he reviewed seems appealing to me. I guess I like modern shooters a tad more than he does, but only because he really, really hates them. Hilarious as always though.

 

[beautos]

He mentioned my home town in passing!!! I feel special now.

 

[Callate]

"Fuck Swearer." I think I laughed up a lung. (LUAL!)

The comment about glowing "go this way" markers on levels that are strictly linear anyway brought to mind one (of many) problems I had with Duke Nukem Forever. All the pinball tables and urinals and writable white boards and what-have-you stop being verisimilitude-enhancing touches and become obvious petty distractions when they exist in the middle of narrow, linear levels with glowing "go here now" signs.

 

[Erttheking]

Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

 

[MorganL4]

You know..... I think the "spunkgargleweewee" thing has some merit........ maybe a DIFFERENT name, but having a different title for the modern military shooter would probably benefit the industry, because right now everyone seems to think that they need to copy COD if they are going to do a MMS...... there we go

The MMS vs the FPS. That is what we need.

 

[Sylveria]

It's funny how people accuse him of not liking shooter when some of the games he give the most praise (Half-Life and Painkiller) are shooters.

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

I guess none of the titles he reviewed seems appealing to me. I guess I like modern shooters a tad more than he does, but only because he really, really hates them. Hilarious as always though.

He doesn't like dudebro-shooters where you, as a player, are largely unnecessary. Doom 3, Painkiller and Serious Sam were made for people who want to play shooters. COD and BF and MOHFloorfighter were made for people who want to hide behind sacks of sand and scream racist terms in to their head-sets.

 

[CleverNickname]

You know, after seeing the opinions of first that biscuit-youtube-person and now Yathzee, I'm starting to think Warfighter was specifically made to be as ridiculously horrible as possible, so that the entire industry just stops making them. The makers of Warfighter must love (real) shooters as much as Yahtzee, because I don't believe you can make something that bad if you don't know what's good. Accidentally bad only ever ends up blandly mediocre; complete terribleness requires true effort.

... at least that's what I'm hoping.

 

[Sylveria]

Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

 

[Bindal]

No mentioning of the driving-sequences if Warfighter? Seriously, as horrible as the game may be - THAT they did right. (Ironic, that the best part of a shooter is the one, where you DON'T SHOOT A SINGLE THING!)

Regarding the name - I would still call them shooter, but I think TotalBiscuits idea of giving them an own sub-genre (Modern Military Shooter, MMS) is a good idea. Just... give them a more fitting name. Like "Point and click movies".

I'm going to accuse him of not liking survival horror games for the bad review he gave Resident Evil 5.

Might as well accuse him to not like Survival Horror due not liking Mario. Because RE left the "Survival Horror" pretty much the same time they went to Third-Person. RE4 still had SOME of it left with it's atmosphere, but after that... nope.

 

[Erttheking]

Funny review I admit that, but I am getting a little tired of people who like games like COD being accused of not being "real" shooter fans.

They're not real shooter fans. They're wall-hugging simulator fans and wouldn't survive a single level in a game where they didn't have a barricade of sand to hide behind while waiting for their health to regenerate.

You know, this is what I would call a self demonstrating article.

 

[JPArbiter]

can I PLEASE get a transcript for everything from "you just do not like shooters." onward?