Bang on the issues there... Some of that game is so bad it's hilarious yet they got the important things right.
Zero Punctuation: Resident Evil: Umbrella Chronicles
- Thread starter Yahtzee Croshaw
- Start date
Thank you, Yahtzee, for stating what I've always said about the Resident Evil series: Abysmal play control (the entire series except for 4), unintentionally hilarious dialogue (INCLUDING 4), and Umbrella's formulaic flatness as villainy. Chronicles, at least, cut out SOME of the play control issues by not having you move around, but still, it makes up for that by demanding superhuman reflexes (if the person who is actually GOOD at this game were a computer, s/he'd be a computer capable of running Crysis at full graphics, s/he'd be THAT fast). 100% true, Yahtzee, except I disagree that it's not the same game over an over again, I think it is. Maybe the first couple sequels had some variety, but every game since then up till 4 has about as much variety as one Zelda installment from the next.
I loved the bit on Captain Planet. I've actually thought the same thing about that show, when reflecting on it. I remember the bad guys dumping toxic waste in rainforest, not because it would save them money, but because they really had it in for the environment, which makes absolutely no sense when I think about it now. However, who here didn't play with cheap plastic toy rings after watching this show? I thought so.
Great review, though.
Great review, though.
You mispronounced "contrivance", mate. That and "inventory" makes two, Yahtzee. For a nitpicking git (albeit funny as shit), you should work on your language skills.
Main Entry: in·ven·to·ry
Pronunciation: 'in-v&n-"tor-E
Main Entry: con·triv·ance
Pronunciation: \kən-ˈtrī-vən(t)s\
Main Entry: in·ven·to·ry
Pronunciation: 'in-v&n-"tor-E
Main Entry: con·triv·ance
Pronunciation: \kən-ˈtrī-vən(t)s\
Haven't watched the review yet, (school comps don't have flash....or speakers) but I will say I enjoyed the game. The only part that annoys me is how damn hard it is to land critical hits. I love how it's not just like a shooting range, you actually interact with the level to find hidden items and paths.
Dammit, Yahtzee, what's the matter whitCHA? (Sorry, I love Chrono Cross) You had the chance to review another Wii game and you pick UMBRELLA CHRONICLES?!
I don't want to see you review another Wii game until you get your hands on No More Heroes. It'll take everything that you thought had a sense of believability and strangle it above a pool of boiling LUNACY.
Got it?! Get yer hands on that game NAO! ...Though... now that I think about it, it might be another game that has been banned in Australia due to its explicit content... in which case, you'd better import it!
I don't want to see you review another Wii game until you get your hands on No More Heroes. It'll take everything that you thought had a sense of believability and strangle it above a pool of boiling LUNACY.
Got it?! Get yer hands on that game NAO! ...Though... now that I think about it, it might be another game that has been banned in Australia due to its explicit content... in which case, you'd better import it!
Careful or you will fall into Zombie Kitten Corrosive Piddle after a rousing game of Twing Twang after you take a full load of Nazi Bullet Bum Rape.
Good review, although the "rail shooter" game is, agreeably, annoying.
Duck hunt on a cart.
What would work better, if you toddle on over to Penny-Arcade, you will see a link (posted last week I believe) about this guy that tweaked the Wii locater to make a 3D perspective shifter. It would locate your head and move the screen accordingly.
THIS would be perfect for a game like this. How many times have you been playing a rail-type-shooter and physically DUCK when something swings at you or is shot/thrown/vomited at you?
This would make you dance around the living room like Barishnakov after one too many McDonald's Espressos dodging stuff as you point a remote-control looking device at your screen trying to hit zombies that are either to stupid to move out of the way, or are somehow superhuman and don't need to.
Side note, I am looking forward to his review of COD4. I have liked many of his reviews here, and whether or not I agree with his overall assessments, his criticisms are usually spot-on. TF2/Orange box was great, so was Arse-Creed, Heavenly Sword and a bunch of the others (me is jealous of Valve excursion).
Question though. The current batch of reviews have all been FPS, RPG or similar first person type adventures. Are there any plans in the works for an RTS game? I know there are not as many out today as there used to be, but games like Company of Heroes or Dawn of War might be fun to hear about.
Starcraft 2 is in the works, and it might be a good time to, um, fluff the pillows before any, um, "reviews" take place.....
Duck hunt on a cart.
What would work better, if you toddle on over to Penny-Arcade, you will see a link (posted last week I believe) about this guy that tweaked the Wii locater to make a 3D perspective shifter. It would locate your head and move the screen accordingly.
THIS would be perfect for a game like this. How many times have you been playing a rail-type-shooter and physically DUCK when something swings at you or is shot/thrown/vomited at you?
This would make you dance around the living room like Barishnakov after one too many McDonald's Espressos dodging stuff as you point a remote-control looking device at your screen trying to hit zombies that are either to stupid to move out of the way, or are somehow superhuman and don't need to.
Side note, I am looking forward to his review of COD4. I have liked many of his reviews here, and whether or not I agree with his overall assessments, his criticisms are usually spot-on. TF2/Orange box was great, so was Arse-Creed, Heavenly Sword and a bunch of the others (me is jealous of Valve excursion).
Question though. The current batch of reviews have all been FPS, RPG or similar first person type adventures. Are there any plans in the works for an RTS game? I know there are not as many out today as there used to be, but games like Company of Heroes or Dawn of War might be fun to hear about.
Starcraft 2 is in the works, and it might be a good time to, um, fluff the pillows before any, um, "reviews" take place.....
Sounds like excellent bargain-bin fodder. The rail-shooter is a thing of the past, sure, but it's also a thing of mindlessly shooting legions of zombies in the face, and sometimes that's exactly what the doctor ordered. combined with the Wiimote actually working for that kind of interface, it'd be like a console version of Serious Sam, only without the shit-tastic controls that that actual console version of Serious Sam had.
Great review, like always. I found the game to be pretty much what yahtzee did, albeit not as hard as he made it out to be. Though i cant help but agree on them still giving out the below average 90's teenage horror movie and trying to act like its something to be shocked and amazed at.
"...Only to have your last millimeter of health lost to a zombie kitten's corrosive piddle" Hilarious review, can't wait for the Call of Duty 4 video.