Zero Punctuation: Tom Clancy's H.A.W.X.

teletran3

New member
Sep 10, 2008
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NOOOOO, Yahtzee just ruined all of those movies for me. Or he would have if I hadn't seen them all. Except for the crying game, that movie just sounds weird.
 

Ghost

Spoony old Bard
Feb 13, 2009
893
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wow i was expecting this to get crap reviews and be branded an ace combat clone, maybe i should play it, even if most other tom Clancy games are crap
 

aciid_raiin

New member
Apr 13, 2009
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I quite like this game too, but being a flightsim guy im easily won over by them.
Hilarious review tho! As always Yahtzee keep up the good work =)
 

Sam Eskenazi

New member
Dec 26, 2008
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Heheh, funny as always, Yahtzee.

I especially liked the spoiler quotes at the end :] "Rosebud was the sled" got me good :]
 

filthgrinder

New member
Aug 20, 2008
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I have to say the animations on this was the worst ever. Was nothing but 100% copy off what he was talking about. Usually it's more clever. Did someone else do them instead? If so get the other guy back!
 

TheBlueRabbit

Ballistic Comedian
Jan 9, 2009
280
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Ok. That's all the reason I needed to not give a crap about this game. Flight sims and I have never really gotten along.
 

HAZEANDHALO

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Apr 16, 2009
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when ben said
with aliens that come from the earths core I thought a screamer was gunna happen LOL
 

lazzars

New member
Aug 13, 2008
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ace combat 04 owns every single light simulator game before or since. he should play that, i'm sure he could still find something to be pissed off at despite it being an amazing game ;)
 

sfried

New member
Dec 20, 2007
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"Hey Yahtzee, every tried the Ace Combat series?

It's essentially H.A.W.K.S with less generic planes...

...and more arsepulling storyline."
 

Destroy Gundam

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Feb 20, 2009
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sfried said:
"Hey Yahtzee, every tried the Ace Combat series?

It's essentially H.A.W.K.S with less generic planes...

...and more arsepulling storyline."
And superweapons. Can't forget those.

Does H.A.W.X also make you fly through a tunnel at the end too?
 

cainx10a

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May 17, 2008
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hey now, H.A.W.X like so many american games tend to stick too much in reality, but then again, realism is not that bad when the medium used is not being exploited like a bunch of rabbits trying to expand the family.

HAWX is a one of a kind game. At least give Ubi some credit for giving us civvies a decent game that doesn't involve hitting 20-30 random switch before taking off etc ... etc ...
 

SoonerMatt

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Apr 18, 2009
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Yahtzee likes air combat games? Well color me surprised.

Still, very good review. Not necessarily a game I would have looked at, but now it at least deserves a rental.
 

Sir_Muffonious

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Apr 15, 2009
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Ilike how the end of this review obviously referenced Gears of War at the end with the joke about timing. It took me back to the Phantom Hourglass review where he was suggesting a way for Nintendo to make better games and his description was just Okami, which is just a much better Zelda-type game. The part about America looking for another WWII like situation was funny, but he already did something very similar in...The Medal of Honor: Airborne review, I think.

Overall this was a good review but the laughs seemed a bit recycled. Also, I don't understand how he could spend so much time in the beginning of the review ranting about the simplicity and poor gameplay in the game and then at the end he just randomly says he likes it. Honestly I'm starting to seriously doubt if Yahtzee's opinion means anything at all.
 

Elf Defiler Korgan

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Apr 15, 2009
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A good one by Yahtzee I think; how bravely he endures another dose of bile-inducing patriotism.

Perhaps if you are shot down in H.A.W.X, as you plummet to the earth there should be the message of "press x to invoke special patriotism recovery". Gritting his teeth the pilot ejects adhesive American flags to cover up the holes and flaming fuselage, before letting out a pure masculine roar, pulling on the stick, and just narrowly saving himself from certain death.

This should be followed by a few minutes of the pilot humming the American national anthem while dog-fighting. He is invincible while doing so.