I have to remind myself that this is a thing within the lore, because it bears zero relevance to the plot, yet it's so fucked up that it can't just be brushed aside. Even Phoebe Cates' messed up Santa Claus story in Gremlins had more purpose.
Your "What were they thinking." Moment while you were playing a game.
- Thread starter Godzillarich(aka tf2godz)
- Start date
OTOH, it does make Huey getting kicked down a flight of stairs TWICE in the prequel games and then getting tortured and then getting left to die in a life raft feel a bit more satisfying.
I mean, I hope I wasn't supposed to feel bad for Huey, because he was pretty terrible all around.
I can't say I felt too invested in Huey in Phantom Pain (or anyone else really), and the fact that he sounds one-to-one with Otacon didn't help shape his personality either. I honestly find it hard to remember anything from PP 's narative.
I do know that that mod that replaces Quiet with Ocelot during the rain scene SHOULD have been cannon. That was a case of 'what WEREN'T they thinking'.
Phantom Pain didn't really give anyone much development, which is a damn shame. Pretty much everyone from Phantom Pain who wasn't just there had already gotten some development from the audio-tapes in Peace Walker. And it's a shame, because there's a pretty decent amount of returning cast from PW to PP.
And then there's Skullface whose entire character is summed up in an 10 minute infodump where he talks exposition at you in a jeep. And totally wasted his long rehearsed speech because it wasn't big boss and he didn't care anyway.
Did those tapes ever mention Chico? Because he played a significant part in Ground Zeroes (as short as that game is), and then he just dies off screen, and is seeming completely forgotten.
I've been playing some of my PS1 games, including Brave Fencer Musashi. Then I got to Steamwood:
- Instant game over if you run out of time with the primary time limit.
- The tasks that need doing consists of a single QTE, which needs to be done multiple times per task. Screw up and the progress bar per task goes backwards.
- Each task must be done in order.
- You have to start ALL tasks over if you run out of time on the much shorter SECONDARY TIME LIMIT. The secondary time limit increases each time a task is completed.
- Musashi does an unskippable animation after each task, which does pause the time limits, BUT...
- Steamwood also has an elevator that always follows a canned animation. Missed your ride up to the next floor? Hope you have time for it to slowly reach the fourth floor, go back down to the first floor, then slowly move back up to your floor... There isn't even a task on the first floor.
The first thing that comes to mind is the 99% chance to hit in Xcom, followed by an absolute wiff. Now I get how statistics work, and yes there was always a chance of things going down like this, but when you're dealing with humans do not ever tell them that they are almost certain to hit and then have them miss. And for god sake never do it twice in a row. I really think that even if the probability of hitting really is 99% as calculated by the game, they should have displayed 90% or even 85% as the absolute maximum that is shown to the player so there's a placebo "well this could always have happened to me" effect going on when you do miss. Cut down on rage, reduce the potential for people to data-mine your game to prove your stats are bullshit.
Then there's Rebel Galaxy and Rebel Galaxy Outlaw. The first game had you entering combat on a 2D plane and trade combat using broadside cannons. Weird, and at the time it bugged me a lot that even my small fast ship could not engage in head to head fighting, but it was unique and reasonably well implimented. In Outlaw they drop that for 3d fighter controls, and damn my eyes for believing this would be better. Combat isn't as tight as in Elite Dangerous for instance, so the whole time all I can think is "man I wish I was in my Anaconda right now". I hate to say that because its obvious that they were trying to go further with their sequel and work that third dimension in, but their success ended at getting the dimension in and they never managed to do much with it.
Then there's Rebel Galaxy and Rebel Galaxy Outlaw. The first game had you entering combat on a 2D plane and trade combat using broadside cannons. Weird, and at the time it bugged me a lot that even my small fast ship could not engage in head to head fighting, but it was unique and reasonably well implimented. In Outlaw they drop that for 3d fighter controls, and damn my eyes for believing this would be better. Combat isn't as tight as in Elite Dangerous for instance, so the whole time all I can think is "man I wish I was in my Anaconda right now". I hate to say that because its obvious that they were trying to go further with their sequel and work that third dimension in, but their success ended at getting the dimension in and they never managed to do much with it.
- RE3Remake - Removing using sub-weapons as self-defense items in case of being grabbed. I know they did this to prevent the player from feeling overpowered, but all they had to do was nerf the high damage they do. Even pressing the QTE button, you still take damage. It's one part of the remake I dislike the most.
- Comix Zone's lack of a continue system and hitting any object that is not an enemy causes you to lose health. WTF was Sega Technical Institute fucking thinking? You do get three lives, but that is assuming you don't die, and you get a life after every other level.
- Everything about The Ooze. Once again, STI had really stupid design decisions to make things absurdly difficult for no reason.
- The shoot'em up section in the 2nd stage in Gunstar Super Heroes. On Hard mode, it's almost luck based because your helicopter as a huge hit box, you only get 100 health with no pick ups, and enemies do absurd damage. I almost chucked my GBA SP towards a wall from the frustration and multiple deaths. Dying takes you back to the title screen.
- The entry fee in No More Heroes. Don't care if that's the point; it causes tedious grinding and makes it that much harder to go back and play it.
- Everything about Street Fighter V when it first launched in 2016. Over focusing on Esports and ESPN. Fuck them! Worry about making you game fun first, and then worry about the rest. It took 3-4 years for the game to be finally be good. It should have not taken that long for a Capcom game! Let alone a SF game! I am glad I waited for the Champion Edition in 2020.
- Sega censoring the crap out Streets of Rage 3 and making it hyper difficult. Though removing Ash was a reasonable move on their part.
- Ethan's pathetic "walk" and run in RE7.
- Sebastian's pathetic stamina you start with in Evil Within 1. The sequel fixed this and many other issues.
- Sonic 06 and Sonic Boom. Sega learned nothing after 10 years and made the same mistakes again!
- Everything about Devil May Cry 2 and DmC (2013). DmC story sucks, most of the character sucks, the trends of 7th gen gaming stick out like a sore thumb, and it was game that was not needed. The only positive things I can add are the stellar soundtrack and the Definitive Edition fixing most of the gameplay issues I had with the vanilla version.
- Parasite Eve: 3rd Birthday........Fuck you, Square for killing off a beloved character and franchise in the worst insulting manner possible!
I love XCOM to bits, and whilst I have clocked 150h into XCOM 2, I haven't completed it yet, because I can't stand the RNG bullshit that just puts me in a bad mood.
I get that it is kind of the nature of the beast, but a squad wipe, caused me an almost-certain hit, that whiffs and does nothing, is exactly why the game gets so much use out of the "Reload Save" button.
Luckily there is a great modding scene for the game, so if/when I decide to revisit the game, im sure I can mod at least some of it out.
Fallout 4: why can't we all just get along? All you assholes needed to do was talk to each other like at least once. On MDMA if possible.
Uh...*glances at Mordin Solus avatar*
Do you really want me to get into that? Because between Kai Leng, the decision to have Cerberus occupy the role of central villain when the Reapers should have taken center stage, the From Ashes DLC, insulting everyone's intelligence by dumbing down the arc-villains' motivation to "different races organics and synthetics are just too different to ever get along" and treating that like wise counsel instead of being almost a direct invocation of the myriad attempts at justifying racism through science, more or less using Dragon Age Origins as the story template for Mass Effect 3 (And if you're doing the 'gathering allies to push back against the invaders' bit in the final act, you've done something wrong), shoehorning in a PTSD story for a new trauma...which can be downright bizarre in light of some of ME1 backstories, to say nothing of the weirdness of how the death of one child haunts Shep in a way that everything else doesn't (excluding the backstories, no trauma over getting spaced, burning up on reentry, hitting terminal velocity and ending up a pancake in the opening of ME2? Why this weird kid rather than Jenkins in ME1? The sacrifice of a friend on Virmire?), the sheer idiocy of "we don't know what this machine is, but we know that it's an anti-reaper weapon that's meant to slot into something that even the designers didn't know about", everything about what is derisively referred to as the 'starchild'...suffice it to say that if I went into detail, I could probably hit the post character count limit before I even started talking about another game.
Though on a much lighter - and probably less discussed - note from the same game...the Victory Fleet cutscene. The intended reaction is obviously 'hell yeah!", but I was practically screaming at my computer "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" See, I love lore and world building. You give me a reasonably well written codex, and I will read it cover to cover...and I did that for Mass Effect. And there are a few interesting entries about fighting the Reapers, such as situations where their defenses are taxed, what kind of weapons are effective against those defenses, innovations that have been made in response to what they learned in the wake of Sovereign's attack on the Citadel, how much concentrated fire they can take, tactics that have caught them off guard in the past... And then comes the Victory Fleet's arrival wherein they proceed to throw strategy to the wind, park all the ships and engage in line firing while in orbit. It's almost as tailor made to maximize the enemy advantage as Game of Thrones' Battle of Winterfell, and it's so frustrating.
Do you really want me to get into that? Because between Kai Leng, the decision to have Cerberus occupy the role of central villain when the Reapers should have taken center stage, the From Ashes DLC, insulting everyone's intelligence by dumbing down the arc-villains' motivation to "
Though on a much lighter - and probably less discussed - note from the same game...the Victory Fleet cutscene. The intended reaction is obviously 'hell yeah!", but I was practically screaming at my computer "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING?" See, I love lore and world building. You give me a reasonably well written codex, and I will read it cover to cover...and I did that for Mass Effect. And there are a few interesting entries about fighting the Reapers, such as situations where their defenses are taxed, what kind of weapons are effective against those defenses, innovations that have been made in response to what they learned in the wake of Sovereign's attack on the Citadel, how much concentrated fire they can take, tactics that have caught them off guard in the past... And then comes the Victory Fleet's arrival wherein they proceed to throw strategy to the wind, park all the ships and engage in line firing while in orbit. It's almost as tailor made to maximize the enemy advantage as Game of Thrones' Battle of Winterfell, and it's so frustrating.
Last edited:
Chico is one of the supporting characters in PW, along with his sister Amanda(she's a bit more important then him but they both end up working with MSF on mother base) where Snake ends up chasing him down during the first act, leading him to the first mech battle.
He's also obssesed with Cryptids(there are tapes where he talks about it with snakes) and you can find a special side area where you fight Metal Gear verisons of monsters from Monster Hunter. Not even joking, it's a bonafide crossover. Complete with the little cat dude.
Yeah, finding out Chico went down with that chopper in GZ hurt bad...and it was wasted if you hadn't played Peace Walker. And now I'm also sad because I remember Peace Walker had more character development in cutscenes like that then Phantom Pain felt like it had in the entire damn game.
Of course, finding out Chico died in the crash make me extremely skeptical when Paz magically showed up on the medical platform...and she's the one who had a fucking bomb inside her.
Last edited:
I think I have yall beat.
The MJ and Miles sequences in Spider-man. What the FUCK were they thinking???
I can understand making us play as them, especially Miles during his dad's death, but these inane instant fail stealth sections? Especially when the game already has stealth sections? Insanity. Doesn't help that MJ can go fuck herself on a rusty spade.
The MJ and Miles sequences in Spider-man. What the FUCK were they thinking???
I can understand making us play as them, especially Miles during his dad's death, but these inane instant fail stealth sections? Especially when the game already has stealth sections? Insanity. Doesn't help that MJ can go fuck herself on a rusty spade.
Exactly why the Miles Morales games is superior. Does not have any of those insta-fail stealth sequences. I really wish developers would stop thinking they're great ideas. It's not the early 2000s anymore.
I think the Spider-man series might singlehandedly justify a PS5 purchase for me. Although I do wonder what they plan to do for the next game. Are we just going get New York in different seasons?
Still waiting on that Spider-Gwen game. Then they do Spider-Verse and after that, they can do whatever the hell they want for all I care. It most likely won't turn out that way of course.
And if you're going to do a "gathering allies to push back against the invaders" bit, at least do it RIGHT. You spend the whole game if not the whole series getting your hands on one war asset after another, just for it to not actually effect the actual final battle in any way whatsoever. Not to mention doing what it should have been allowed for and let the Milky Way forces to get together and be able to kick the Reaper's asses out of the galaxy in a straight fight, no Crucible. This is why the Extended Cut didn't really fix anything, the entire final battle portion of the game was completely lackluster. All the Extended Cut did was turn the ending from godawful to barely watchable, and that's being generous.
Last edited:
Also from Sunshine, making Yoshi dissolve in water... in a game filled with water. Aren't we supposed to want to get Yoshi, not dread the points that require it?
I can understand trying to give your game some mission variety. Halo, for example, one mission is on-foot, and in tight corridors. The next level, is wide-open, and heavily encourages vehicle use. At the end of the day, though, it is all the same great game.
Spider-Man can do this, and does do this, but I have no idea why they felt the need to force you to play as some powerless shmuck, and have you crouch behind boxes, multiple times.
This isn't what people play Spider-Man for, and the devs need to have a little more faith in their gameplay loops. This is exactly the reason why I have such distaste for DOOM Eternal.
Infamous Second Son carries on the trend of putting drones or blast shards on objects that don’t support proper platforming, like a clump of variable height pier posts, where you’re more likely to fall in the water even though Delsin can’t swim. It made sense for Cole, but Seattle is a notoriously wet city, which makes the absence of even a pseudo-swimming mechanic feel like a missed opportunity. Even if his smoke powers meant being vulnerable to water, it would’ve been cool to have a hover dash that maybe drained power quicker or slightly damaged health on your way to land instead of just sending you back to shore, because then you’re often disoriented and farther out of the way if you missed something.