Recent content by MooseHowl

"Christian Bale is Moses?! Christian Bale looks about as jewish as Jet Li!" Oh god. I can't stop laughing at that line, for some reason. If only Jet Li would follow his dreams and one day play Moses in a movie, like he knows he has always wanted to, deep in his heart!

Vin Diesel plants a tree. Huh. I guess trees really can grow when watered with pure testosterone. I stand corrected. Also, squeeee.

It's always nice to hear analysis of why something is good and the bits where it stumbles, but really, I was pretty much sold by the tagline "Disney's Animated Avengers". How is it that some people outgrow this stuff, anyway? I still squee and clap my hands at fun kid movies, 15+ years after...

The more I hear about Shadow of Mordor, the more it sounds like it was constructed by committee. Frankensteined together out of otherwise healthy parts, to make a game with maximum possible "brand potential" and "consumer appeal", whatever those are supposed to be. Still a fine game, by...

I've hated this problem for so long, games with bad endings... it really does feel like a waste of time when a game plays out so perfectly for most of its time, then stumbles and drops its pants right at the end. So, I'm going to list a few games that had awesome endings. Final Fantasy 6...

Not sure where all the hate on Mario comes from, honestly. "Monsters" in mario games are monsters because they instantly resort to murder when they encounter Mario. Bumped into a koopa while just minding your own business on they sidewalk? Boom, you're dead, he murdered you. Mario, by...

I completely agree with the outrage on this one. Not because I have any interest in Watchdogs; I just find that somewhere along the way PR departments stopped being used for dampening flame wars and smoothing out bad reactions to their stuff, and started blaming the people they're supposed to...

Thank god for Jim! Really, a lot of these low-budget games festering on Steam are just moronic. Hey there, indie devs who are also apparently flailing chimps with a keyboard: sorry to tell you this, but your dreadful game is dreadful, and deserves to fail in obscurity. It isn't satirical, or...

Seems a bit odd to include Terraria on a list of survival games. Most of those games require some degree of personal upkeep; in Terraria, you don't have to eat anything, ever, and even the copious healing potion intake of an average Terrarian is entirely optional. Terraria is about as much of a...

I would totally use the code "Hella sickness, brah." Just use it on every vampire I meet, forever. Dang it... that intro was terrible (and the game, too!), but now I really want a surfing game themed entirely around California vampires. Call it Surf the Moonlight; since the vamps can't surf...

Yeah. They really do look quite poor. For me, it comes down to the perspective - seeing it in-game, it's just all over the place. Are the characters leaning into the background? Are they leaning into the foreground? Are their heads really small, or just further away for some reason? Why are...

Ouch. That seems like a pretty big pair of design oversights. Assist bonuses are desperately important for teaching newbie number-hunters how to work as a team, and if they're ALSO grabbing as much money as they can and depriving the rest of team of it in the process... yikes. I was thinking...

"Whoa. She just Yoshi'd her horse." "That is some cold shit." Giggling relentlessly while typing this. You monsters. How can you be so shamelessly hilarious?!

Same deal for me, I had to scroll down to find out what Gavin actually sang there. It doesn't really sound like it once you know what the line actually is, but if you're not reading the written lyrics... yeah. "Cons" is definitely not the first word a bystander is gonna hear.

Silly question, that. It's obvious: if the ventilation shaft corkscrews, then you don't need spinning fans. It's a real power-saver in... THE FUTURE! :) That was a good unskippable! It had a good combination of funny commentary and an intro movie that manages to be boring, pointless and...