"Experimental Artists" Invite Doom Upon Humanity

Andy Chalk

One Flag, One Fleet, One Cat
Nov 12, 2002
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"Experimental Artists" Invite Doom Upon Humanity

"Tweets in Space" will launch unedited Twitter conversations at alien worlds.

In what is perhaps the dumbest idea in the history of human civilization, a couple of experimental artists want to collect tweets from around the world and then fling them across the stars at planets most likely to support human-like life, beginning with the recently discovered GJ 667Cc, which lies about 22 light years from Earth.

"We will collect all Twitter messages tagged #tweetsinspace and transmit them into the cosmos via either a home-built or borrowed communication system," spacetweeters Scott Kildall and Nathaniel Stern explained on their RocketHub page [http://www.rockethub.com/projects/7291-tweets-in-space]. "Our soon-to-be alien friends will receive scores of unmediated thoughts and feedback about politics, philosophy, pop culture, dinner, dancing cats and everything in between."

The duo is raising funds on RocketHub because it needs to either build or borrow a transmission system capable of actually getting tweets into space. Funds raised above and beyond the $8500 goal will go toward upgrading the hardware, online coding, design and promotion, while the tweets themselves will be provided by anyone who uses the #tweetsinspace hashtag during two "performance events" at the 2012 International Symposium on Electronic Art [http://www.isea2012.org/], which takes place September 19-24.

"Tweets in Space asks us to take a closer look at our spectacular need to connect, perform and network with others. It creates a tension between the depth and shallowness of sharing 140 characters at a time with the entire Internet world, in all its complexity, richness and absurdity, by transmitting our passing thoughts and responses to everywhere and nowhere," the pair wrote. "These 'twitters' will be stretched across all time and space as a reflection on the contemporary phenomenon of the 'status' updates we broadcast, both literal and metaphoric."


That's great. It's also likely to bring interstellar doom down upon our heads, as the galactic community finally takes notice of what's going on over here and decides that humanity cannot be allowed to survive. How is it possible that four decades of "progress" has taken us from this [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Voyager_Golden_Record]? We might as well take our cue from Chairface Chippendale and use a laser to burn a giant wang onto the surface of the moon.

To learn more about Tweets In Space and the coming end of the world, check out tweesinspace.org [http://tweetsinspace.org/].


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TilMorrow

Diabolical Party Member
Jul 7, 2010
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They should put some youtube video comments in amongst the twitter conversations. Those will really doom us.

How they hell do they think that this is even going to work? Even if they could get the system delivering the messages, would the life, if it exists there, even speak our language? Answer: Probably not.
 

Sixcess

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Feb 27, 2010
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This is what we need to send into space:


A message of happiness, friendship and eternally optimistic exploration of our universe, in words and images that any being can understand.
 

RaNDM G

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Apr 28, 2009
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@Sixcess: This is what they will send back:

Humanity is boned.
 

McMullen

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Mar 9, 2010
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Oh, anyone out there in listening range has heard or will hear worse from us well before any tweets reach them.
 

Spitfire

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Dec 27, 2008
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Oh yeah, raise $8500 to do fuck all. That sounds like a good idea.

I like how not once in that video do they address why anyone should give the slightest bit of damn about this project. I mean, if you seriously believe that the planet in question might be inhabited by alien life, then why would you send a series of incoherent and indecipherable bits of text at them?
IF there's alien life there to pick up the message, and IF they would somehow be able to decipher it, then there's still the issue of, what the hell kind of introduction to humanity is "@douchebag Yo what's up?"
 

Daverson

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Nov 17, 2009
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Pretty sure AOL or someone already did this.

But hey, if crudely grafting social media onto existing ideas and claiming it to be original is a way of making money, I'd like to present my latest and totally original work of art. It's the "Mona Lisa" in .jpg format, you know, for facebook! Shall we start the bidding at, say, 2 million?
 

Silver Patriot

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Aug 9, 2008
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"Tweets in Space" will launch unedited Twitter conversations at alien worlds.

Seriously though, I understand what they are trying to do but it just seems to be asking for trouble to tell people that their messages will be sent unfiltered into space and let them go nuts. Please tell me I will at least be prefaced with a message that the following is completely unmodified messages from the internet.
 

Moonlight Butterfly

Be the Leaf
Mar 16, 2011
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The thought of an alien getting my cat picture linked to him makes me happy. Although we must brace ourselves when the aliens come to get their very own kitties.

 

CleverCover

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Nov 17, 2010
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Here's to hope that the people put intelligent, thoughtful comments about universal peace and exploration and the hope to come together and learn new things...

Aww damn, it's a possibility (if they even hit something at all) they're going to send about twenty "ur mom" jokes to vastly superior beings aren't they?
 

theheroofaction

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Jan 20, 2011
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On the off chance that that world does hold alien life, and that they would somehow know how to turn these back into text, they still don't know english.
 

ScruffyMcBalls

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Apr 16, 2012
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And let the racism commence. I mean seriously, the levels of xenophobia we'll experience if we look through all those tweets will be enough to make our eyes bleed, come on, tell me I'm wrong. But I say fuck it, lets hope someone does pick up the phone on the other end and come clean up this mess. Hopefully they won't just resort to orbital death lasers and give the bright few of us a chance to explain/justify ourselves first.
I'd like to think this is how Atlantis was destroyed.
 

Dudeman325

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Jan 31, 2011
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Hey aliens, up yours!

Oooh, what are you gonna do about that, huh? Fly over here and blow up my planet? Yeah right, wussies...

#tweetsinspace
 

BoogieManFL

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Apr 14, 2008
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What a stupid idea. I don't want these idiots speaking for humanity. It's bad enough space is being flooded with the more idiotic of our entertainment broadcasts..
 

Frotality

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Oct 25, 2010
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i have to agree with andy chalk: we go through the effort of collecting the best examples of human culture and proof of our intelligence and launch it into the stars, then these jackoffs fuck it all up by trying to launch the best examples of human pettiness and stupidity.

stop fucking with first contact you assholes, it is not the place to "experiment" with anything!
 

Ickorus

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Mar 9, 2009
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Adam Jensen said:
I for one welcome our alien overlords.
Given the amount of puerile bullshit any possible alien species might see I wouldn't blame them if they decided to forgo enslavement in favor of planetary cleansing from orbit.
 

370999

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May 17, 2010
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Spitfire said:
Oh yeah, raise $8500 to do fuck all. That sounds like a good idea.

I like how not once in that video do they address why anyone should give the slightest bit of damn about this project. I mean, if you seriously believe that the planet in question might be inhabited by alien life, then why would you send a series of incoherent and indecipherable bits of text at them?
IF there's alien life there to pick up the message, and IF they would somehow be able to decipher it, then there's still the issue of, what the hell kind of introduction to humanity is "@douchebag Yo what's up?"
Has anyone else thought what if aliens actually are actually like the cast of Jersey shore with FTL travel?

If they would come to bro fist us?

Shudder