Very very sad... hopefully all turns out well. I'm sure you've sat down and talked with your wife about it, but I definitely think there are some warning signs. I've played WoW, and unfortunately had my "phase" when I was playing the game way too much, but I was single at the time, so it didn't matter, and I got through it. When you are in a serious relationship or a marriage however, it will adversely effect your partner when you choose to spend time with the game over him/her.
I don't think you're being selfish or childish, this is a serious problem. I had a guildie who played WoW obsessively, and ruined his marriage because of it. My hopes are that she will be more aware of what she is doing. Best case scenario, she sees how she is affecting the marriage, and abstains from the game because of it. In the long run, fanatic WoW gaming never brings anyone happiness.
EDIT: One last thing... even though WoW breaks relationships, it can also make them. I have made many fantastic friends on the game, both near and far away, and I met the person I'm in a relationship with in the game. Sometimes I curse the game for the time it has taken from my life, but I wouldn't take any of it back. I've made mistakes and learned many lessons, learned a lot about the nature of people and myself, and that's something worth keeping. Besides, I never would have met my boyfriend otherwise.
