The Counterattack

[The Wooster]

The Counterattack

?You must be shapeless, formless, like water. When you pour water in a cup, it becomes the cup. When you pour water in a bottle, it becomes the bottle. When you pour water in a teapot, it becomes the teapot. Water can drip and it can crash. Become like water my friend.? - Bruce Lee.

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[008Zulu_v1legacy]

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

 

[RJ 17]

I believe this is what we call "escalation". :3

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

I'm pretty sure the joke is that just seeing "Elliot's Water" is enough to make her drink it, despite the color, hence "her capacity for spite making her predictable."

 

[Covarr]

I'm pretty sure the joke is that just seeing "Elliot's Water" is enough to make her drink it, despite the color, hence "her capacity for spite making her predictable."

That's what I got out of it. You could even write "definitely not urine" and it'd still work.

P.S. Thanks

 

[Thaluikhain]

I'm pretty sure the joke is that just seeing "Elliot's Water" is enough to make her drink it, despite the color, hence "her capacity for spite making her predictable."

That's what I got out of it. You could even write "definitely not urine" and it'd still work.

P.S. Thanks

Ah, but then you'd be lying. This way you get to be fairly truthful (if euphemistic), which is supposedly the mark of a true something or other.

 

[lacktheknack]

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

"It's got lemon in it."

OT: We did this at my last workplace. Not THIS, exactly, but we boobytrapped someone's lunchbag with two-months-past-the-expiry-date lunchmeat and rancid nuts and left it in the fridge. Soon enough, we found out who was stealing lunches.

 

[Gatlank]

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

Apple juice or maybe apple cider could also be viable options.

 

[TallanKhan]

He managed quite an impressive quantity...

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

"It's got lemon in it."

OT: We did this at my last workplace. Not THIS, exactly, but we boobytrapped someone's lunchbag with two-months-past-the-expiry-date lunchmeat and rancid nuts and left it in the fridge. Soon enough, we found out who was stealing lunches.

So let me see if I have this right, you had suspicions that a co-worker was stealing lunches so instead of asking management to investigate you deliberately poisoned them? Well, this earns you an official High-Five from human resources...

 

[FPLOON]

"Why of course that's water... I just love to add some color to it to brighten up my day..."

Other than that, unless she secretly likes drinking piss, I'm sure this will work out according to plan...

 

[Deathfish15]

He managed quite an impressive quantity...

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

"It's got lemon in it."

OT: We did this at my last workplace. Not THIS, exactly, but we boobytrapped someone's lunchbag with two-months-past-the-expiry-date lunchmeat and rancid nuts and left it in the fridge. Soon enough, we found out who was stealing lunches.

So let me see if I have this right, you had suspicions that a co-worker was stealing lunches so instead of asking management to investigate you deliberately poisoned them? Well, this earns you an official High-Five from human resources...

Not really poisoned THEM, technically. They had their own lunched, most likely labeled in the fridge. Well, even if not labeled, it was theirs. Twas the thief's own fault for getting sick/food poisoning for stealing something that wasn't theirs. Would be the same situation if the person had some sort of medical food with medication inside of it and the thief took that and ODed on it. Would not be the fault of the person who brought the food, but the thief that stole it.

Basic, common courtesy applies to a work breakroom fridge: If you didn't bring it -and it's not some sort of potluck thing- then HANDS OFF! So simple a child could understand it. And yet, non-courteous bastards just cannot comprehend it!

 

[Darth_Payn]

Is this the start of another multi-strip arc? Tuesday's strip wasn't a one-off gag? Yay!
I believe using your enemy's worst qualities against them is covered in Sun Tzu's "The Art of War". And maybe Machiavelli's "The Prince".

 

[Redlin5_v1legacy]

I hope this is the beginning of a new office saga.

 

[Elementary - Dear Watson]

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

Apple juice or maybe apple cider could also be viable options.

Cider!? Who boozes at work!?

OT: Hehe... Loved this one! Although, is lunch thieving a thing? It's never happened at my work! Then again... the military. You don't get passive agressive responses here... you get escalatory retaliation involving physical pain.

 

[direkiller]

You'd have to label it "Vitamin Water", something to explain the colour away.

Apple juice or maybe apple cider could also be viable options.

Cider!? Who boozes at work!?

Cider in the US is unfiltered apple juice.

 

[Erttheking]

That is...I don't even...I just...I'm not sure whether i find this funny or not. Never was a fan of jokes that involved drinking urine.

 

[ccggenius12]

He managed quite an impressive quantity...

RIGHT? Dude was mid-stream when he was conversing, and still had enough left in the tank to top off a (presumably) 10.6 OZ bottle of water. He MAY want to get checked for diabetes...

 

[lacktheknack]

So let me see if I have this right, you had suspicions that a co-worker was stealing lunches so instead of asking management to investigate you deliberately poisoned them? Well, this earns you an official High-Five from human resources...

Not right. We DID ask management to investigate.

Asking for something from bad management most certainly does not mean they follow up on it.

And as for poisoning them... if they didn't break policy so flagrantly, they would have been fine. No one was supposed to eat that lunch.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

I bet every coworker peed in that bottle in order to fill the whole thing up. I highly doubt one man can fill up that much, especially after peeing already during the conversation lol.

I've had moments where I've filled 2 water bottles and still needed room for more. Coffee goes right through me... 3+ cups in the AM due to insomnia the night before and work that morning.

 

[Blood Brain Barrier]

I bet every coworker peed in that bottle in order to fill the whole thing up. I highly doubt one man can fill up that much, especially after peeing already during the conversation lol.

I've had moments where I've filled 2 water bottles and still needed room for more. Coffee goes right through me... 3+ cups in the AM due to insomnia the night before and work that morning.

And you were peeing in a water bottle at work because...?

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

I bet every coworker peed in that bottle in order to fill the whole thing up. I highly doubt one man can fill up that much, especially after peeing already during the conversation lol.

I've had moments where I've filled 2 water bottles and still needed room for more. Coffee goes right through me... 3+ cups in the AM due to insomnia the night before and work that morning.

And you were peeing in a water bottle at work because...?

I used to drive long distances for a living and was on a schedule I couldn't stop for. Its pure talent to be able to piss in a water bottle while driving and not wreck horrendously.

EDIT: Hit post too quick... Meant to add that the road I was driving at that particular moment didn't really have a shoulder to pull off on that didn't involve plunging the car into a body of water.