50 Americanisms That Brits Apparently Hate

[drisky]

seems like a over reaction to a language that has evolved in to different ways over the course of over a thousand years and hasn't become an issue until the globalization of the internet. I mean words like take-out, bangs, and train station are just plain silly to complain about. It might as well be complaining that we speak a interlay different language, because the fact is almost all European languages are just the misuse of Latin anyways. Deal with it already.

 

[Loop Stricken]

It might as well be complaining that we speak a interlay different language...

I hope that was intentional.

o_.

 

[BehattedWanderer]

Coincidentally, some of those are things I don't like about the language when used by Brits. The ones that are horrible mutations of the language should be put down, however. Winningest is a prime contender for first taste of the peppermint-flavored shotgun shells.

 

[Tentickles]

As a Texan, I find this list hilariously funny.

This topic reminds me of the preface to 'Pygmalion' by George Bernard Shaw.

"An english speaking person cannot open their mouth without incurring the contempt of another english speaking person. There is no agreed-upon way to pronounce the wretched language, as written English uses a latin script in which none of the letters have a predictable phonetic value." (meaning you can't tell how to pronounce an english word even if you know how it is spelt)

The English language is a mis-mash of at least 7-10 distinct languages. From Latin to French to German to Spanish... it goes on.

and yes. It is confusing.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Peter piper picked a pack of pickled peppers, how many pickled peppers did peter piper pick?
Many an anemone sees an enemy anemone.
Imagine an imaginary menagerie manager imagining managing an imaginary menagerie.
A skunk sat on a stump and thunk the stump stunk, but the stump thunk the skunk stunk.

 

[Loop Stricken]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

African or European?

 

[drisky]

It might as well be complaining that we speak a interlay different language...

I hope that was intentional.

o_.

No I guess I typed it wrong and didn't catch the autocorrect. I have never been a good speller and I would be lost with out wavy red lines. That has nothing to do with the different ways people speak though.

Edit: Happy Birthday by the way.

 

[rancher of monsters]

Gotten? But it's such a woody word. gooooooootten.

 

[Blemontea]

My only question is on number 11. Transport instead of Transportation? Transportation sounds more proper and dignified than transportation. It is certainly one of the black sheep of the list.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

I live at the opposite side of England from a friend and we argue on how to pronounce 'grass' and many other words. I think I can give Americans some leniency.

[small]although 'aluminum' and 'nucular' make my eye twitch...[/small]

So the BBC found nearly 50 grammar nazis and asked them about inconsequential common-use phrases, pronounciations and other assorted bullshit nobody with a sensible head cares about in daily use?


And here I thought the Beeb didn't trouble themselves with such petty stories...this is something I'd half-expect Fox to do.

They often do random silly little stories to cheer people up. We do live in the dark greyness of Britain after all

 

[Loop Stricken]

So the BBC found nearly 50 grammar nazis and asked them about inconsequential common-use phrases, pronounciations and other assorted bullshit nobody with a sensible head cares about in daily use?


And here I thought the Beeb didn't trouble themselves with such petty stories...this is something I'd half-expect Fox to do.

Although the Beeb certainly do dish out the shite stories on occasion, it's vastly more obvious on the website with that horrible Have your Say section or whatever it's called nowadays. Full of idiots.

I live at the opposite side of England from a friend and we argue on how to pronouce 'grass' and many other words. I think I can give Americans some leniency.

Gr-ass, not gr-arse. If he uses the latter call him a soft southern dandy.

 

[Tentickles]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

African or European?

Are you including a coconut?

 

[Loop Stricken]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

African or European?

Are you including a coconut?

Kinky.

To avoid a short post; Ca any American explain why you park on the driveway and drive on the parkway? :3

 

[Sikratua]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

African or European?

Are you including a coconut?

Only if we're talking about swallows.

 

[Moonlight Butterfly]

Gr-ass, not gr-arse. If he uses the latter call him a soft southern dandy.

Don't worry I do hehehe

 

[starkiller212]

The only language/grammar thing that really bothers me is the incorrect use of "their", "they're", and "there". I don't mind so much that I'd correct it on internet forums, but the misuses are so widespread that it seems most people would fail an elementary English exam today.
Honestly, it's not difficult at all. "They're" is a contraction for "they are" (that should be painfully obvious), "their" is possessive, and "there" refers to a location (generally).
I've even seen fellow students use them interchangeably within the same sentence in their essays for a university writing class; that's just sad to me.

(and yes, I did put extra effort into ensuring that I made no mistakes in this post, although I might have missed some in my sleep-deprived state )

EDIT:

Gotten? But it's such a woody word. gooooooootten.

Oh, it's much better than a word like had at least, how dreadfully tinny. Haaaad, ugh!

 

[lowkey_jotunn]

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?

African or European?

Are you including a coconut?

Only if we're talking about swallows.

Also kiinky.


P.S. wtf is hay'ch and Zed? how however they pronounce the letters H and Z.

 

[Theron Julius]

The irony here being that half of those corrections were either illogical or were thoroughly irritating themselves from an American perspective. Heheh "maths". That one was actually kind of funny.

 

[IceStar100]

I give a few like I could care less

Most if it feel more like get over yourself.

 

[photog212]

Deplane?

I have never heard someone say deplane ever, anywhere.

Tattoo from Fantasy Island. (sorry)

 

[MisterShine]

1. When people ask for something, I often hear: "Can I get a..." It infuriates me. It's not New York. It's not the 90s. You're not in Central Perk with the rest of the Friends. Really." Steve, Rossendale, Lancashire

This is kind of annoying too, especially when there's no please at the end. This is just assholes though.

2. The next time someone tells you something is the "least worst option", tell them that their most best option is learning grammar. Mike Ayres, Bodmin, Cornwall

Who the hell says this? Slap them.

4. Using 24/7 rather than "24 hours, 7 days a week" or even just plain "all day, every day". Simon Ball, Worcester

It's faster.

5. The one I can't stand is "deplane", meaning to disembark an aircraft, used in the phrase "you will be able to deplane momentarily". TykeIntheHague, Den Haag, Holland

I've flown on many a plane, never heard this one.

6. To "wait on" instead of "wait for" when you're not a waiter - once read a friend's comment about being in a station waiting on a train. For him, the train had yet to arrive - I would have thought rather that it had got stuck at the station with the friend on board. T Balinski, Raglan, New Zealand

Don't get cute with prepositions.

7. "It is what it is". Pity us. Michael Knapp, Chicago, US

What can I say? It is what it is.

8. Dare I even mention the fanny pack? Lisa, Red Deer, Canada

Motherfuckers, we don't even know WHAT A FANNY IS. THAT IS YOUR SHIT NOT OURS.

9. "Touch base" - it makes me cringe no end. Chris, UK

It is kind of suggestive isn't it?

10. Is "physicality" a real word? Curtis, US

No.

11. Transportation. What's wrong with transport? Greg Porter, Hercules, CA, US

"I need some transport. I need some transportation"

Second one sounds better.

14. I caught myself saying "shopping cart" instead of shopping trolley today and was thoroughly disgusted with myself. I've never lived nor been to the US either. Graham Nicholson, Glasgow

That's because trolley is a stupid fucking word and you know it.

16. "I'm good" for "I'm well". That'll do for a start. Mike, Bridgend, Wales

We just don't like well, okay? We good?

17. "Bangs" for a fringe of the hair. Philip Hall, Nottingham

The front part of your hair.

18. Take-out rather than takeaway! Simon Ball, Worcester

You're taking it out, you're taking it away. Both work.

19. I enjoy Americanisms. I suspect even some Americans use them in a tongue-in-cheek manner? "That statement was the height of ridiculosity". Bob, Edinburgh

If someone says "ridiculosity", regardless of circumstance, you slap the shit out of them.

20. "A half hour" instead of "half an hour". EJB, Devon

The an is unnecessary.

22. Train station. My teeth are on edge every time I hear it. Who started it? Have they been punished? Chris Capewell, Queens Park, London

This one I'm confused on. What are we supposed to call the train station? Station is where vehicles go.

23. To put a list into alphabetical order is to "alphabetize it" - horrid! Chris Fackrell, York

Alphabetize is a cool word! Z is underused as it is.

24. People that say "my bad" after a mistake. I don't know how anything could be as annoying or lazy as that. Simon Williamson, Lymington, Hampshire

You say "My bad, I'm sorry", if you don't add the I'm Sorry you're a douche.

25. "Normalcy" instead of "normality" really irritates me. Tom Gabbutt, Huddersfield

Normalcy? That's not a word!

28. Eaterie. To use a prevalent phrase, oh my gaad! Alastair, Maidstone (now in Athens, Ohio)

Do people say that? Maybe in Athens they do. Barbarians.

29. I'm a Brit living in New York. The one that always gets me is the American need to use the word bi-weekly when fortnightly would suffice just fine. Ami Grewal, New York

No one knows what a fortnight actually is. I'm vaguely suspicious the British don't know either, it's just a general time for a "few days from now".

31. "Hike" a price. Does that mean people who do that are hikers? No, hikers are ramblers! M Holloway, Accrington

Hikers go "up" hills. The prices go up. Derp.

32. Going forward? If I do I shall collide with my keyboard. Ric Allen, Matlock

As in the phrase "going forward"? As in, going forward the path of life? Derp.

34. The most annoying Americanism is "a million and a half" when it is clearly one and a half million! A million and a half is 1,000,000.5 where one and a half million is 1,500,000. Gordon Brown, Coventry

You're being shitty with the language there. The "and a half" is easily assumed to be a half of another million.

35. "Reach out to" when the correct word is "ask". For example: "I will reach out to Kevin and let you know if that timing is convenient". Reach out? Is Kevin stuck in quicksand? Is he teetering on the edge of a cliff? Can't we just ask him? Nerina, London

Its called an idiom you twerp.

36. Surely the most irritating is: "You do the Math." Math? It's MATHS. Michael Zealey, London

Do we do Sciences? Fuck no, we Do Science! [http://xkcd.com/54/]

37. I hate the fact I now have to order a "regular Americano". What ever happened to a medium sized coffee? Marcus Edwards, Hurst Green

This whole coffee sizes stuff is bullshit, agreed. A tall is the smallest one? That makes no goddamn sense.

38. My worst horror is expiration, as in "expiration date". Whatever happened to expiry? Christina Vakomies, London

Expiry is not a word, even if firefox and dictionary.com is telling me it is. You just made that shit up.

39. My favourite one was where Americans claimed their family were "Scotch-Irish". This of course it totally inaccurate, as even if it were possible, it would be "Scots" not "Scotch", which as I pointed out is a drink. James, Somerset

We get lots of things wrong with our heritage, because by law we can't say that we're American, we have to specify which part of the world most of our ancestors came from at some point. Yes, that is a real law.

40.I am increasingly hearing the phrase "that'll learn you" - when the English (and more correct) version was always "that'll teach you". What a ridiculous phrase! Tabitha, London

That'll learn you is pretty stupid, but people still say teach you.

42. Period instead of full stop. Stuart Oliver, Sunderland

It's an economy of language.

43. My pet hate is "winningest", used in the context "Michael Schumacher is the winningest driver of all time". I can feel the rage rising even using it here. Gayle, Nottingham

If someone says "winningest" to you, you slap the shit out of them. That defense will hold up in court.

44. My brother now uses the term "season" for a TV series. Hideous. D Henderson, Edinburgh

BECAUSE TV SERIES IS REFERRING TO ALL OF THE SEASONS AS A WHOLE YOU ASSHATS. SEASON IS FOR EACH YEAR IT IS ON. GOD DAMN YOU DR WHO.

45. Having an "issue" instead of a "problem". John, Leicester

We say both.

46. I hear more and more people pronouncing the letter Z as "zee". Not happy about it! Ross, London

If you say "zed" I will slap you.

47. To "medal" instead of to win a medal. Sets my teeth on edge with a vengeance. Helen, Martock, Somerset

I don't think that is ever said. I got medal? No, that's dumb.

48. "I got it for free" is a pet hate. You got it "free" not "for free". You don't get something cheap and say you got it "for cheap" do you? Mark Jones, Plymouth

Actually, we DO say "I got it for cheap".

49. "Turn that off already". Oh dear. Darren, Munich

We're doubling it for emphasis.

50. "I could care less" instead of "I couldn't care less" has to be the worst. Opposite meaning of what they're trying to say. Jonathan, Birmingham

This one is kinda bad. Unless, like me, they use it to mean literally, they could care less. I get this one with my mother all the time. "I love you my son" "I could care less." "WHAT?!" "Literally, I could care less about you. A whole lot less. Cuz' I love you. Please stop making that angry face at me, it was a joke!"

Phew. That's my real time reaction to this post, because I'm fucking bored and needed to waste 10 minutes typing. Hope someone found it amusing or educational at least.