Stolen Pixels #209: Please Let Me Arrest You

Shamus Young

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Jul 7, 2008
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Stolen Pixels #209: Please Let Me Arrest You

Resident Evil's Chris Redfield is the worst zombie cop ever.

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Quiet Stranger

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Feb 4, 2006
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hahahahaha!!!! Chris is an idiot!!!

Love this one

EDIT: If he was pointing that gun any harder he'd be bleeding out of his ears!
 

AmrasCalmacil

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Jul 19, 2008
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You can't shoot a woman in a dress like that!

It's probably designer.
Maybe Chris should take the Squad from SWAT4 with him when he goes Zombie hunting, they always seem to fill people with lead the very moment that the blinded and gassed criminals don't put their guns down when I'm playing.
 

DTWolfwood

Better than Vash!
Oct 20, 2009
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haha XD o lolz the god forsaken expositions always get in the way!

incidentally TAKEN was one of my fav movies because he didnt talk much and especially in the boss fight at the end ;)
 

RelexCryo

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Oct 21, 2008
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"I think my family got the impression Resident Evil 5 was some sort of voice-activated game based on how much time I spent screaming at the screen, "Shoot him! Shoot his face! Shut your stupid mouth and pull the trigger you damned fool!"


EPIC awesomeness as always Shamus/John. This bothered me too. My primary consolation was the fact that a revolver was the best weapon in the game.
 

Onyx Oblivion

Borderlands Addict. Again.
Sep 9, 2008
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Why did I like that game again?

Ahh...Infinite ammo is fun. That's why.

Even just an infinite ammo pistol. I beat the game with just that...Good times.

I can't tell you how much I hated my first playthrough...

Not to mention that Chris traded all his brains cells for MUSCLES!
 

Jared

The British Paladin
Jul 14, 2009
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Its so true...his custody records must be so light, cant take anyone in at all!
 

JeppeH

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Nov 18, 2009
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I think this is true in SO many games.. theres clues all over the place, and if you read them, you conclude that the baddie is in the next room. Then the protagonist just HAS to stop and ask who the hell they are anyways.. ARGH! ITS THE VILLAN! SHOOT IT!

I actually LOLLED in Mass Effect, where this scene starts and a villan-type starts yapping his mouth and you can kill him douring the cutscene before he stops talkin. (known as gaspipe-scene)
 

Chipperz

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Apr 27, 2009
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JeppeH said:
I actually LOLLED in Mass Effect, where this scene starts and a villan-type starts yapping his mouth and you can kill him douring the cutscene before he stops talkin. (known as gaspipe-scene)
Which was immediately countered by going headfirst into a collector ship that may as well have been called the SS Obvious Trap with noone commenting on just how easy everything was until after they get ambushed...

Anyway, remember kiddies - your guys may do stupid things in the cutscenes, but if they actually did their jobs in these things people would be bitching that they did all the cool stuff when you can't control them...
 

Outright Villainy

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Jan 19, 2010
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Oh, metal gear has been doing this for years, and far more headbangingly. Take the time you meet liquid snake near metal gear rex, and he gives you a big lecture for 10 minutes on genes and crap, and you're just pointing your damn gun and doing fucking nothing for the entire time. snake even tries to shoot him eventually, but after he's gotten into the cockpit and it's too late.
Gah, Video game protagonists piss me off!
 

therandombear

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Sep 28, 2009
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Onyx Oblivion said:
Why did I like that game again?

Ahh...Infinite ammo is fun. That's why.

Even just an infinite ammo pistol. I beat the game with just that...Good times.

I can't tell you how much I hated my first playthrough...

Not to mention that Chris traded all his brains cells for MUSCLES!
Those arms required more then 1 brain to be so big, that's why the AI is so stupid.

Infinite ammo always fun...with shotgun and bow xD
 

ZephrC

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Mar 9, 2010
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JeppeH said:
I actually LOLLED in Mass Effect, where this scene starts and a villan-type starts yapping his mouth and you can kill him douring the cutscene before he stops talkin. (known as gaspipe-scene)
Have you ever tried not shooting him? It's hilarious. He keeps talking forever and the little symbol letting you know you can interrupt him stays there the whole time, occasionally making the noise from when it first appears again. They really want you to shoot him in the cutscene.

Chipperz said:
Which was immediately countered by going headfirst into a collector ship that may as well have been called the SS Obvious Trap with noone commenting on just how easy everything was until after they get ambushed...
Are you kidding? There's a whole section of the stage at the beginning with nothing but empty halls and cutscenes, and the whole time the only thing anyone talks about is what an obvious trap it is. The thing they're surprised by when the trap is sprung is
that the Illusive Man knew it was a trap and sent them into it with no warning.