8 Video Game Movies You Can Safely Avoid

ffronw

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Oct 24, 2013
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8 Video Game Movies You Can Safely Avoid

If you must watch a movie based on a video game, make sure it's not one of these eight.

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COMaestro

Vae Victis!
May 24, 2010
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I have to disagree with Doom. It's probably the best video game to movie adaptation in existence. Unless you are just going with all video game movies can safely be avoided. And Street Fighter has an odd campy charm to it. I can totally agree with the rest of the list.
 

Xan Krieger

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Feb 11, 2009
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COMaestro said:
I have to disagree with Doom. It's probably the best video game to movie adaptation in existence. Unless you are just going with all video game movies can safely be avoided. And Street Fighter has an odd campy charm to it. I can totally agree with the rest of the list.
The thing that killed me about that movie was the whole "genetic experiments" instead of "demons from Hell". They failed to stay true to the game and that was a letdown.
 

Sniper Team 4

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Apr 28, 2010
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I'm glad Resident Evil wasn't on the list (well, except for maybe the third one). Yeah, those movies are bad, but they're also enjoyable and at least try to bring in parts of the game.

Anyway, I've never seen most of these movies. I vaguely remember Super Mario Bros. and remember thinking, "But where are the koopa troopers?" when I was little, so yeah...not impressed with that movie.

I saw Doom in theaters, and while it was pretty bad, it wasn't terribly painful for me. I actually thought the First Person part of the film was pretty cool, although I would not want to watch the whole thing that way. I still say it should have ended with them coming out of the elevator and coming face-to-face with armed men and then it cuts to black. Would have been a proper Doom ending in my opinion.

Ah, Street Fighter. Why did no one ever use their special moves? I wanted to see people throwing fireballs out of their hands. Why can't fighting movies do that?

I remember when I caught the first five minutes of Mortal Kombat: Annihilation. I was like, "Cool, they made a sequel. I wonder if--wait, what?! Did...did they just kill Cage? Just like that?" Never watched the rest of the movie because that was such a red flag that I was done with it.
 

ffronw

I am a meat popsicle
Oct 24, 2013
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COMaestro said:
I have to disagree with Doom. It's probably the best video game to movie adaptation in existence. Unless you are just going with all video game movies can safely be avoided. And Street Fighter has an odd campy charm to it. I can totally agree with the rest of the list.
Really? I'd have to say the Prince of Persia movie, or the second Tomb Raider movie for my favorite video game movie, I guess. None of them are stellar. I just thought Doom was a disaster. It was hard to sit through, and that goofy first person section at the end was just the last straw.
 

COMaestro

Vae Victis!
May 24, 2010
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ffronw said:
COMaestro said:
I have to disagree with Doom. It's probably the best video game to movie adaptation in existence. Unless you are just going with all video game movies can safely be avoided. And Street Fighter has an odd campy charm to it. I can totally agree with the rest of the list.
Really? I'd have to say the Prince of Persia movie, or the second Tomb Raider movie for my favorite video game movie, I guess. None of them are stellar. I just thought Doom was a disaster. It was hard to sit through, and that goofy first person section at the end was just the last straw.
I totally forgot about the Prince of Persia movie, though I've never seen it and can't judge it in any case. I didn't care for the first Tomb Raider movie, so I never saw the second one to be able to comment on it either. To add to that, I never cared all that much for Doom the video game. It was okay, but kinda nonsensical, so I think the movie worked with that for me.

Sniper Team 4's post made me remember that the second Resident Evil movie was pretty enjoyable too. Didn't care for the others, but the second one worked. So the second RE movie might top Doom in my video game movie list, but these still aren't necessarily "good" movies.
 

Canadamus Prime

Robot in Disguise
Jun 17, 2009
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I disagree with Street Fighter. Street Fighter was hugely entertaining, if only for Raul Julia as Bison.
 

Kurt Cristal

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Mar 31, 2010
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ffronw said:
"Unfortunately, it's like watching someone else play your game on your computer. We all know that's no fun at all."
Have you heard of this thing called a "Let's Play"? I heard they are pretty popular.
 

ffronw

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Kurt Cristal said:
Have you heard of this thing called a "Let's Play"? I heard they are pretty popular.
Ah, I see. My meaning was a bit ambiguous. I meant it's like watching a friend come over to your house, sit down at your PC, and proceed to play your games all night, while all you can do is watch.

Let's Play videos can certainly be entertaining.
 

Kurt Cristal

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ffronw said:
Kurt Cristal said:
Have you heard of this thing called a "Let's Play"? I heard they are pretty popular.
Ah, I see. My meaning was a bit ambiguous. I meant it's like watching a friend come over to your house, sit down at your PC, and proceed to play your games all night, while all you can do is watch.

Let's Play videos can certainly be entertaining.
What if you're really bad at the video game and called your friend over to play it because its too hard, and you sit there amazed at his skills at the game? :)
 

Elementary - Dear Watson

RIP Eleuthera, I will miss you
Nov 9, 2010
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I hope you mean Sir Ben Kingsley, and Freddy Prinze Jr? ;)

Also... Doom? Really? That wasn't that bad! I enjoyed the 1st person bit... it was brief, and it was a homage to the origin of the movie... although the story was different enough that it didn't feel like a film of the original games!

I am also glad (as Sniper Team 4 above) that Resident Evil wasn't on the list... They are cheesy as fuck, but hell I love them! The last one (if you can believe the title) is coming out this year, and I am organising a band of people to watch the original 6 with me before it come out! Hopefully, it is as good as 2!

Instead of Doom... what about DOA? (Dead or Alive?) or Postal... or were they too bad to grace the list?

I am also glad that Hitman, Max Payne, Silent Hill, Prince of Persia and Final Fantasy didn't make it, as they were at least relatively enjoyable!
 

JohnnyDelRay

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Jul 29, 2010
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Not a badly done list, although mine would be much easier: ANYTHING done by Uwe Boll, boom, there you go. No need to put yourself through any anguish, easily done, just avoid any of those abominations like the plague.

Other movie adaptation have at least had some charm to them, either cheesy, or action value, or just plain silly, even if they stray from the host material.
 

Denamic

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Aug 19, 2009
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Doom was about mutants and not about a portal or any demons from hell. It was a giant pussy move to avoid any religious connotations, and it ended up just shitting all over the franchise. It didn't help that the movie was a kinda okay sci-fi action movie at best if you're watching it while drunk. DOOM, it is not.
 

ffronw

I am a meat popsicle
Oct 24, 2013
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Kurt Cristal said:
What if you're really bad at the video game and called your friend over to play it because its too hard, and you sit there amazed at his skills at the game? :)
I'm usually that friend. :) (Not really)
 

Story

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Sep 4, 2013
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Be honest: there weren't enough good movies for the "Top 8 Video Game Movies You Must See" list were there? :p
Maybe that will change in the next 10 years or so.
 

Drake Barrow

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Jan 10, 2010
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I've got to disagree with the placement of #1 and #8. Alone In The Dark is pretty watchable, like a middling quality session of a modern horror tabletop game. The concept is stellar (a shout-out to Bureau 13, and a pleasingly alien if generic threat), and while the acting is pretty atrocious, I've seen far worse. The ending is shite, the latter half of the film has serious problems, but I didn't regret watching it. Good? No, but if this film had been done by anyone other than Boll, it would have been.

Whereas House of the Dead...the summary given doesn't describe exactly what level of torment you're subjecting yourself to if you watch it. Nonsensical, jumbled, terrible acting, terrible action, just plain terrible all around. It committed the ultimate sin of a bad movie - it failed to entertain on any level. I'm going out on a limb here, but I doubt the RiffTrax crew could make this one funny.

Other than that, I agree with your list. Doom was almost as bad as House of the Dead, and Street Fighter's saving grace were some really great lines.
 

Remus

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Nov 24, 2012
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Story said:
Be honest: there weren't enough good movies for the "Top 8 Video Game Movies You Must See" list were there? :p
Maybe that will change in the next 10 years or so.
Lets see.....
Mortal Kombat
Resident Evil 1-3
Silent Hill
Prince of Persia
and...that's 6.

There have been a lot of mediocre videogame films. Not good, but not exactly terrible, like Hitman or DOA. But good ones, they top out at 6. Even the Resident Evil flicks are barely passable in that regard as they are largely mindless action flicks with a zombie sidestory.
 

Travis Fischer

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Feb 1, 2012
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Ahhh Doom. Take an easy premise about a crazy portal to hell and turn it into a bad Aliens knock-off for the first hour.
 

ffronw

I am a meat popsicle
Oct 24, 2013
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Story said:
Be honest: there weren't enough good movies for the "Top 8 Video Game Movies You Must See" list were there? :p
Maybe that will change in the next 10 years or so.
I thought about doing that one as a counterpoint. Then I realized it would be more like "8 Video Game Movies You can Watch if There's Really Nothing Else at All On" and I got depressed.
 

Gordon_4_v1legacy

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Aug 22, 2010
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The live action Tekken movie was a plate of curried arseholes too. The only bright spots are Ian Anthony Dale as Kazuya who at least has the decency to ham it up, and Cary-Hiroyuki Tagawa as Heihachi, who made the grand move of sporting the elder Mishima's distinctive hair and epic moustache. Otherwise it was an awful piece of crap.