Ms. 'Splosion Man Developers Send Us Meat

[Russ Pitts]

Ms. 'Splosion Man Developers Send Us Meat

We get a lot of random videogame-related crap sent to us. Sometimes it's interesting, like Dante's Inferno [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/news/view/95781-EA-Rickrolls-Yahtzee]. Some of it is not, like the bottle of water I received from somebody, at some point, advertising something I've now forgotten.

Today, however, is a day that will go down in infamy as the day I received a box of frozen meat, courtesy of Twisted Pixel, the makers of Ms. 'Splosion Man [http://www.escapistmagazine.com/articles/view/editorials/reviews/6320-Review-Splosion-Man]. As you can see from the attached image, it's pretty good meat, too. Frozen steak from Omaha Steaks.

It's so good, in fact, I feel a little guilty accepting it. If I didn't think it would ruin in the mail, I'd offer to send it to one of you lot as a reward for correctly guessing something over Twitter [http://twitter.com/#!/TheEscapistMag]. Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

In any event, this just makes me all the more curious to see what will come of Ms. 'Splosion Man, the sequel to one of the most surprisingly fun games of 2009.

Says Twisted Pixel:

Ms. Splosion Man features bigger levels, pumped-up bosses, overhauled networking, ghost replays, and countless other improvements in a fifty-level single player campaign and separate fifty-level multiplayer campaign.

Ms. 'Splosion Man will be released on July 13th via Xbox Live Marketplace [http://marketplace.xbox.com/en-US/Product/Ms-Splosion-Man/66acd000-77fe-1000-9115-d80258410b19?cid=search] for 800 points. The meat, however, is available now. For me. Via the office freezer.


Permalink

 

[Kross]

OOH GIVE STEAK

 

[samsonguy920]

Tell Twisted Pixel they will get even more love if they release both Splosions on Steam as well. I want to play the donut song!

And show us a picture of the culinary masterpiece before you eat it.

 

[Russ Pitts]

Ideas...
EDIT: spoilered for graphic nature.

Spoiler

You'll have to buy your own onion nails though.

 

[2fish]

Ideas...
image snip
You'll have to buy your own onion nails though.

I vote for reading a eulogy for Sean befpre you eat him. I mean ms 'splosion man did kill him and he saved kittens on his days off.

 

[Formica Archonis]

Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

 

[2xDouble]

Nice. Good to know meat works just as well as cookies for a bribe. I shall remember this, should I ever make a game...

 

[Russ Pitts]

Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

First person to photoshop me with spark tits gets something awesome. Go!

 

[Aethren]

I've never heard of that brand of steaks before, are they good or something?

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

First person to photoshop me with spark tits gets something awesome. Go!

You know not of the Hell you just released...

OT: This fine and good, but what does this do with anything with "Ms. Splosion Man?" It would've made sense if it was Super Meat Boy, but Splosion Man isn't made out of meat, he is made out of explosions!

 

[Hippobatman]

You know not of the Hell you just released...

OT: This fine and good, but what does this do with anything with "Ms. Splosion Man?" It would've made sense if it was Super Meat Boy, but Splosion Man isn't made out of meat, he is made out of explosions!

Yes, but every scientist he blew up turned into meat! It's perfect! You're eating people, Russ!

 

[mjc0961]

OT: This fine and good, but what does this do with anything with "Ms. Splosion Man?" It would've made sense if it was Super Meat Boy, but Splosion Man isn't made out of meat, he is made out of explosions!

One of Splosion Man's failed attempts at humor to try and distract you from how few ideas the game has while it's boring you to death is that you can explode the scientists in the lab you're trapped in and they turn into steaks. You even get an achievement if you do it enough times. [http://www.xbox360achievements.org/game/splosion-man/achievement/27576-Omaha-Steaks-#174;--Delicious-.html]

Anyway, people can probably guess that I'm not at all excited for Ms. Splosion Man based on my above description of the first game. I am curious about one thing, though. What's a better food gift to randomly get in the mail as a promotional item: cookies or steaks?

 

[Formica Archonis]

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

First person to photoshop me with spark tits gets something awesome. Go!

Can I just excise the neurons where the image is stored and send those to you? I sure as hell can't use 'em for anything useful anymore.

And I do see this thread rapidly falling into kinda-NSFW territory, so I think I'll bow out for the next four hours, before someone shoulder surfs me.

 

[Sixties Spidey]

In before "bungie did it first lol".

 

[DigitalSushi]

Crush peppercorns,
cover steak with said peppercorns,
heat frying pan,
Fry steak to liking!
add double cream
leave to simmer
enjoy!
Thank me later!

Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

Come to think of it, I've never seen Russ Pits and Lady Gaga in the same room...

 

[Twilight.falls]

Obviously whoever sent that is stalking you!
In order to find out who, you need to organize a steak out !

Hohoho, that slaps me on the knees.

 

[duchaked]

yummmm I'm hungry...time for dinner hahaa

 

[Not G. Ivingname]

OT: This fine and good, but what does this do with anything with "Ms. Splosion Man?" It would've made sense if it was Super Meat Boy, but Splosion Man isn't made out of meat, he is made out of explosions!

One of Splosion Man's failed attempts at humor to try and distract you from how few ideas the game has while it's boring you to death is that you can explode the scientists in the lab you're trapped in and they turn into steaks. You even get an achievement if you do it enough times. [http://www.xbox360achievements.org/game/splosion-man/achievement/27576-Omaha-Steaks-#174;--Delicious-.html]

Oh, okay, thanks for that clarification.

 

[GeorgW]

Aw man, now I'm hungry
Give steak!

Instead I'll have to make it into an open-faced loose meat sammich. Or wear it as a dress. Or something.

Russ, you do realize that a phrase like that makes people (meaning "me, at least") think of other things Lady Gaga wore. Damn you for making me think of you with spark-tits.

First person to photoshop me with spark tits gets something awesome. Go!

I don't have photoshop, but here:

Spoiler: Spoiled for bad quality and the horror