For about a month or so i was seeing this amazing woman. Seriously, everything about her was either extraordinary or at least cute. Still broken into constantly pouring attention into someone I considered a significant other, I put my every bit of attention on getting her attention. Later, I eased myself into a mentally healthier mood of not caring as much. This is where I learned that casual romance is fucking beautiful.
Its two weeks after I left for Taiwan on a short summer Hire position and I finally got into contact with her tonight after leaving countless sappy (mostly drunk) messages on her facebook. The first things we talked about tonight were half apologies from me about being sappy and drunk. The other half was about how she didn't think of me in "that" way and that she had quickly replaced me immediately after I had left.
And you know what, I honestly don't care. A few days ago I thought this woman was the sun and now, listening to her tell me about how I was a passing fancy for her (a fancy, that she added, she would still enjoy getting into if I were actually still around), I actually felt better. So, I realized, this is what I've become. There was a time when relationships meant the world to me and the slightest betrayal would rend my spirit and crush me. A girl I am still enamored with just told me she's been doing some guy for two weeks without telling me and I actually feel better that someone is at least entertaining her while I'm gone.
So, I'm sitting here writing, waiting for the denial to catch up with me. I'm completely content right now (well, maybe not because I have work in 3 hours). That's sort of the scary part. Why am I so pleased with myself right now? I was literally just told that I've been replaced. Not necessarily with a better model but still replaced. I was just told that, while I'm still an "amazing guy" (her words) she doesn't really feel anything deep for me.
What do you guys and girls think? Have I completely lost my soul at this point? Are my reactions to this whole situation remotely normal? Do you think you could ever go through what I did and come out feeling the way I do now? Cuz I feel like my life is grand.
Its two weeks after I left for Taiwan on a short summer Hire position and I finally got into contact with her tonight after leaving countless sappy (mostly drunk) messages on her facebook. The first things we talked about tonight were half apologies from me about being sappy and drunk. The other half was about how she didn't think of me in "that" way and that she had quickly replaced me immediately after I had left.
And you know what, I honestly don't care. A few days ago I thought this woman was the sun and now, listening to her tell me about how I was a passing fancy for her (a fancy, that she added, she would still enjoy getting into if I were actually still around), I actually felt better. So, I realized, this is what I've become. There was a time when relationships meant the world to me and the slightest betrayal would rend my spirit and crush me. A girl I am still enamored with just told me she's been doing some guy for two weeks without telling me and I actually feel better that someone is at least entertaining her while I'm gone.
So, I'm sitting here writing, waiting for the denial to catch up with me. I'm completely content right now (well, maybe not because I have work in 3 hours). That's sort of the scary part. Why am I so pleased with myself right now? I was literally just told that I've been replaced. Not necessarily with a better model but still replaced. I was just told that, while I'm still an "amazing guy" (her words) she doesn't really feel anything deep for me.
What do you guys and girls think? Have I completely lost my soul at this point? Are my reactions to this whole situation remotely normal? Do you think you could ever go through what I did and come out feeling the way I do now? Cuz I feel like my life is grand.
