A Few Years Ago (relationship)

[Blackflame140]

Hey, so this is about this girl that I like, original right?

So I met this girl in my math class to years ago and i had a crush on her since then, but shes has had a boyfriend for like 3 years. Just recently she had broken up with her boyfriend, I'm tempted to make a move and ask her out but, since that math class a few years ago we have become very good friends. Normally this wouldn't be so bad because iv been pondering this for a while, but the kicker is that I think that my best friend is have near the same feelings, they have been hanging out around my back and when ever I go away I feel nervous to when I leave those two alone. I know that i cant control her emotions but if she loves my best friend theres not much i can do about that, but if i ask her and she doesn't feel the same way about me i feel that we wont be able to be friends any more with out it being awkward.

So, what do you think Escapist? enlighten me.. or don't.

 

[hyperhammy]

If this friend of yours is really a good friend than he'll back off since you already have a history with this girl.
Try your luck, maybe she already chose.

 

[Blackflame140]

we've been friends since 3rd grade.. so I guess I should talk to him and see how he feels about her..

 

[Glamorgan]

The noble thing to do is to let your best friend have her, but I've tried this, and it really hurts. I wouldn't recommend it.
Be courteous, flirt with her, charming, etc etc. But be fairly fast about it. You really don't want her to get feelings for someone else, or god forbid, get another boyfriend. Or even worse, girlfriend. If that happens, I'd give up.
But, hopefully it wont. If you really want help, just ask BonsaiK. He'll know what to do.

 

[RaphaelsRedemption]

we've been friends since 3rd grade.. so I guess I should talk to him and see how he feels about her..

Wait... you should talk to HIM?

Way to make the girl feel like a commodity. She has a brain (one would hope), so ask her out, and abide by her decision.

It doesn't have to end with you two not being friends anymore. Maybe she doesn't want you OR your best friend.

In any case, fighting over her with your best male friend is silly at best.

 

[Adzma]

There's an abundance of relationship threads today.

I agree with talking to your mate about it. Probably the best way to begin.

 

[Vexik]

My two cents rattle thusly: I think you should talk to the girl first. She's the one you're thinking of asking out, not your friend. Follow that up with some talk with this guy, and you'll know the full spectrum of what's going on. Honest, open communication is matchless when it comes to cutting through melodrama, especially when it has the sharpening power of understanding. I don't know any of the three people in this little triangle, but there's never anything to be gained by sitting around wondering.

But especially, I'd talk to the girl directly. She's not a thing to be won, whose possession is decided on by you and your buddy.

 

[Blackflame140]

The thing is that he knows that i have feelings for her, its just that its been a long time since he had discovered this so he may believe that that feelings have faded. something that may or may not be relevant but when she comes over to hang out, we usually watch a horror movie or something funny.

 

[thedeathscythe]

Ask her out. Even if she likes him more, what if he never asks her out? He'll never have a chance and you've given yourself one. If she says no, go back to normal and maybe ask her out again.

EDIT: Oh, I forgot he's also your friend. Well, maybe talk to him first. In my realm, though, me and my friends close enough for me to care about, would know we both like her, and we always give up on them mutually so that this doesn't happen. You think he likes her, but you don't know. Either find out, or just go for it, dude.

 

[BonsaiK]

Oh my god, in before "bros before hoes", I don't believe it.

I've answered your question in the Relationship problem thread, at the following link: ----> http://www.escapistmagazine.com/forums/read/18.117161-Relationship-problem-thread?page=44#7557139

 

[Meemaimoh]

But especially, I'd talk to the girl directly. She's not a thing to be won, whose possession is decided on by you and your buddy.

Thank you for being such a sensible and enlightened gentleman.

Honestly, just listen to this guy. He knows what he's talking about.

 

[AmberST]

There's an abundance of relationship threads today.

I agree with talking to your mate about it. Probably the best way to begin.

It's summer what do you expect? people are bored...

Tbh communication it out. Tell her and ask him and then you can make a decent conclusion.

 

[Blackflame140]

she said no...

 

[SimuLord]

she said no...

Proving that she may be on the rebound but at least she's still got standards.

(sorry, couldn't resist. Nothing personal.)

 

[ALuckyChance]

You were honestly going to ask a person that recently broke up, that you suspect of getting together with your best friend. Not only might that confirm your suspicions, it also might mean you shouldn't date women who hook up with someone else immediately, which implies she doesn't care much for relationships, or had planned this in advance, which might mean an affair.

But, you know. Just throwing it out there.

 

[Kurokami]

Hey, so this is about this girl that I like, original right?

So I met this girl in my math class to years ago and i had a crush on her since then, but shes has had a boyfriend for like 3 years. Just recently she had broken up with her boyfriend, I'm tempted to make a move and ask her out but, since that math class a few years ago we have become very good friends. Normally this wouldn't be so bad because iv been pondering this for a while, but the kicker is that I think that my best friend is have near the same feelings, they have been hanging out around my back and when ever I go away I feel nervous to when I leave those two alone. I know that i cant control her emotions but if she loves my best friend theres not much i can do about that, but if i ask her and she doesn't feel the same way about me i feel that we wont be able to be friends any more with out it being awkward.

So, what do you think Escapist? enlighten me.. or don't.

Try your luck, alternative is that you become bitter and transfer it to both or either of them.

 

[fenderstrat]

i hate to tell you this but, she probably sees you just like a friend, after all this time, and nothing more. but thats just my personal experience talking... hopefully i'm wrong?

 

[Dark2003]

Just find out her feelings, and go from there

 

[Kurokami]

Try your luck, alternative is that you become bitter and transfer it to both or either of them.

Just find out her feelings, and go from there

He tried, and he failed. Unsurprising, really.

Sorry, Obviously should have read down further.

she said no...

I can give you a few blundering stories of my own to possibly make you feel better, if you'd like.