Absurd, Surreal and 100% True - The Weirdest Thing That's Ever Happened To Me

[AntiChri5]

I have a small update, the police let me know he's facing charges of Destruction of Private Property, Disturbing the Queen's Peace and 15 counts of Assault on Police. Seems he spat in the face of one officer, bit another and headbutted a third in the crotch while they were trying to book him.

I have a small update, the police let me know he's facing charges of Destruction of Private Property, Disturbing the Queen's Peace and 15 counts of Assault on Police.

he's facing charges of Destruction of Private Property, Disturbing the Queen's Peace and 15 counts of Assault on Police.

15 counts of Assault on Police

15 counts of Assault on Police

How the heck does one man acquire 15 counts of Assault on Police in one arrest using nothing but his head? D:

Inspiration, that's how.

Anyone else suspect that this was actually a baby krogan that somehow got loose on Earth?

 

[DyqstARD]

Holy fuck I just remembered there's a midget dude that strolls up and down my road each day time to install those guard dogs

 

[Jaythulhu]

I'll be telling this story on stage on Friday after work at an open mic night. Hopefully I'll get as good a reaction from the audience as I did from you all. I'll post an update on how things went.