Am I doing something wrong?

[renegade7]

Okay, so I've never really been too lucky with girls, I don't know why, but I always end up being put in the dreaded 'friend-zone'. I'm always really nice and I've been told by a lot of people that I'm a really decent guy, but it's just never worked out. I admit I'm a bit of a nerd, but I don't see why liking video games would make me unattractive. I'm 17 btw.
get it cut.

 

[SckizoBoy]

The only thing I... and probably most subsequent posters, will say, is to keep plugging away. Since you've been 'friend-zoned' a bit, you clearly have no trouble talking to girls. Just talk to more, perhaps your friendship with a girl friend might develop into something more. Besides, you're seventeen! There is neither any real necessity (in the grand scheme of things) or any rush, to be in a relationship at your age (granted, I'm not the best person to hear that from, but hey). Still, as some girls would attest (and some guys for that matter), dating friends often yields the most fulfilling relationships.

Anyway, you look pretty good, if a bit grim, and liking video games has little to do with attractiveness when girls who are 'worth it' are concerned. Seriously, why would you like a girl if she looked down on you for gaming?

 

[similar.squirrel]

I think it often just comes down to luck. That probably sounds discouraging, but it shouldn't be. If you really are as you describe yourself [and you're by no means unattractive, by the way], you will eventually stumble upon somebody. That doesn't mean you shouldn't work on trying to woo the ladies, only that you shouldn't get discouraged when it doesn't go according to plan.

 

[krazykidd]

Well i used ( still am ) to be like that , ALWAYS getting friendzoned , have you tried going on online dating sites? Thats where i met my 1st girlfiend , ( and 2nd and third... hmm i think i see a patern here ) but the important thing on dating sites is to be completly honest , don't make things up because you wouldn't want other people to think your a phony if you go out on a date with someone.

liking video games has little to do with attractiveness when girls who are 'worth it' are concerned. ?

Because at 17 ( in my experience ), video games are considered uncool ( if you play too much and dont do anything else ) and at that age being cool is everything.

 

[Svenparty]

Although it can be hard to not fall into the "friend zone" being a little more forward at the start but not creepy can ensure that you never stay in that area. Videogames can be seen as a negative hobby if it's all consuming. Some of my friends never go outside and I can see why girls would be put off by this.

Personally alhough this won't be popular advice: Go be a bit reckless! Free your inhibitions by sharing some alcohol or something with a girl to change the mood a little bit I think most people are more comfortable with themselves when drinking and it's not like your forcing women to get drunk.

 

[renegade7]

Although it can be hard to not fall into the "friend zone" being a little more forward at the start but not creepy can ensure that you never stay in that area. Videogames can be seen as a negative hobby if it's all consuming. Some of my friends never go outside and I can see why girls would be put off by this.

Personally alhough this won't be popular advice: Go be a bit reckless! Free your inhibitions by sharing some alcohol or something with a girl to change the mood a little bit I think most people are more comfortable with themselves when drinking and it's not like your forcing women to get drunk.

Whooaa I'm only 17 dude

 

[Svenparty]

Although it can be hard to not fall into the "friend zone" being a little more forward at the start but not creepy can ensure that you never stay in that area. Videogames can be seen as a negative hobby if it's all consuming. Some of my friends never go outside and I can see why girls would be put off by this.

Personally alhough this won't be popular advice: Go be a bit reckless! Free your inhibitions by sharing some alcohol or something with a girl to change the mood a little bit I think most people are more comfortable with themselves when drinking and it's not like your forcing women to get drunk.

Whooaa I'm only 17 dude

Ah well I supposed I cannot legally recommend you drinking alcohol to help things. That said if you were to pretend you suddenly lived in a country where 17 was legal it might be an idea...it's a cheap inhibition loosener but as long as your not abusing it I feel you can really get to know someone using alcohol as a medium. From my experience most of the people I known usually only end up in relationships etc due to impulse sometimes caused by booze.

 

[dertyqwerty]

Well, I'm a girl and I will tell you right now, your looks are not your problem

My honest opinion? You're 17, so still in high school yes? Girls suck right now. Video gaming isn't your problem, every teenage guy I know plays them of some variety, so don't be thinking you're some oddball anomaly. I don't know a girl who would ever not date someone solely because he's a gamer. If she does, she might as well just cross off dating anything with a penis.

I think it often just comes down to luck. That probably sounds discouraging, but it shouldn't be. If you really are as you describe yourself [and you're by no means unattractive, by the way], you will eventually stumble upon somebody. That doesn't mean you shouldn't work on trying to woo the ladies, only that you shouldn't get discouraged when it doesn't go according to plan.

I think this is the right idea. It's a lot about luck and time. I personally don't think dating is too wise in high school anyway. Everyone goes off to college pretty soon and it can just complicate things. But I know, we all want love so we do it anyway. So be yourself. Be confident. Don't doubt your hobbies and interests, that's what brings people together is a shared interest in something. And if you don't find a girl right away, so what. You'll meet all kinds of great girls in life, and sooner or later something will click.

 

[Geekiest]

Coming from a woman, here's the biggest problem I see:

You're 17.

I don't think teenagers really know who they are yet, let alone who they're going to be in a relationship. The best girls I know are the ones who realize that and didn't get involved in real relationships until they figured that out for themselves, and met a guy who knew too. The teens is a terrible time to find someone who can love you like you deserve. Accept that no one under 18 is going to be worth the effort until they grow up, and look forward toward maturing yourself into the guy who those smart girls are looking for because he was smart too. If high school girls aren't interested in you, take it as a compliment. They don't know what to look for yet.

Note: being a nerd is only a down-side if you want a normal, non-nerdy girl. In which case, I can't really help you. Normal girls have horrible taste in men, in my opinion. Nerd boys is where it's at.

 

[Chasing-The-Light]

Coming from a woman, here's the biggest problem I see:

You're 17.

I don't think teenagers really know who they are yet, let alone who they're going to be in a relationship. The best girls I know are the ones who realize that and didn't get involved in real relationships until they figured that out for themselves, and met a guy who knew too. The teens is a terrible time to find someone who can love you like you deserve. Accept that no one under 18 is going to be worth the effort until they grow up, and look forward toward maturing yourself into the guy who those smart girls are looking for because he was smart too. If high school girls aren't interested in you, take it as a compliment. They don't know what to look for yet.

Note: being a nerd is only a down-side if you want a normal, non-nerdy girl. In which case, I can't really help you. Normal girls have horrible taste in men, in my opinion. Nerd boys is where it's at.

First, I really love your avatar. xD Just had to get that out there.

Second, I have to agree with you. At 17 you have a really slim chance of getting into a relationship that's going to last a long time. I mean, it's always possible, but there's always the risk.

I definitely agree in saying wait a while and you'll find someone who doesn't mind your nerd-ness, and really likes you. My best advice is to be direct. Don't wait a few weeks to talk and get to know them before asking them on a date. If you like a girl, ask her out and take that time to get to know her. That way, she knows immediately that you're looking to date her, not be her friend. ... Well... be her friend too, of course... but.... you know what I mean. xD Sorry I'm terrible at explaining.

Best of luck.

 

[Geekiest]

First, I really love your avatar. xD Just had to get that out there.

Second, I have to agree with you. At 17 you have a really slim chance of getting into a relationship that's going to last a long time. I mean, it's always possible, but there's always the risk.

I definitely agree in saying wait a while and you'll find someone who doesn't mind your nerd-ness, and really likes you. My best advice is to be direct. Don't wait a few weeks to talk and get to know them before asking them on a date. If you like a girl, ask her out and take that time to get to know her. That way, she knows immediately that you're looking to date her, not be her friend. ... Well... be her friend too, of course... but.... you know what I mean. xD Sorry I'm terrible at explaining.

Best of luck.

Thanks on the Av, finally settled on one I like I think.

I agree. Although I'm a fan of the one-to-two month minimum before asking someone out officially. Saying "I like you and I think I'd be interested in dating you after we get to know each other better." is usually a pretty good bet. A month or two is long enough to generally weed out the looks-normal-but-is-a-complete-wacko. And don't be upset if she says she's not sure at first, and wants to air on the side of saying no rather than leading you on. Girls worth the trouble will need to get to know a guy before they know if he's dating material.

 

[artanis_neravar]

Note: being a nerd is only a down-side if you want a normal, non-nerdy girl. In which case, I can't really help you. Normal girls have horrible taste in men, in my opinion. Nerd boys is where it's at.

Why would anyone want a non-nerdy girl? I mean "normal girls" don't even show up on my radar anymore then maybe a quick glance here and there

 

[Geekiest]

Why would anyone want a non-nerdy girl? I mean "normal girls" don't even show up on my radar anymore then maybe a quick glance here and there

Exactly. Who wants to date someone that's not a nerd? They're so boring. Why endure a conversation about The Hills when you could be nerding out over the Avengers movie? Why pick out each other's jeans when you can work on costume pairs for Comic-Con?

The Geek shall inherit the Earth.

 

[artanis_neravar]

Exactly. Who wants to date someone that's not a nerd? They're so boring. Why endure a conversation about The Hills when you could be nerding out over the Avengers movie? Why pick out each other's jeans when you can work on costume pairs for Comic-Con?

The Geek shall inherit the Earth.

Or Anime Boston, or (and this is my favorite) arguing about whether DC or Marvel is better. Anyone who can actually challenge me in all things nerdy is amazing in my book

 

[Geekiest]

Exactly. Who wants to date someone that's not a nerd? They're so boring. Why endure a conversation about The Hills when you could be nerding out over the Avengers movie? Why pick out each other's jeans when you can work on costume pairs for Comic-Con?

The Geek shall inherit the Earth.

Or Anime Boston, or (and this is my favorite) arguing about whether DC or Marvel is better. Anyone who can actually challenge me in all things nerdy is amazing in my book

Ah, yes, the classic DC v Marvel debate. Usually those degenerate into glaring matches pretty quickly with me. I grew up a DC girl, but I'm pissed at them for the latest Batman fiasco. Marvel has a tendency toward far too much emo-ing out in my opinion, except in their tertiary series, which I have a preference for on both sides of the fence. So much <3 for Runaways and Fables.

 

[artanis_neravar]

Exactly. Who wants to date someone that's not a nerd? They're so boring. Why endure a conversation about The Hills when you could be nerding out over the Avengers movie? Why pick out each other's jeans when you can work on costume pairs for Comic-Con?

The Geek shall inherit the Earth.

Or Anime Boston, or (and this is my favorite) arguing about whether DC or Marvel is better. Anyone who can actually challenge me in all things nerdy is amazing in my book

Ah, yes, the classic DC v Marvel debate. Usually those degenerate into glaring matches pretty quickly with me. I grew up a DC girl, but I'm pissed at them for the latest Batman fiasco. Marvel has a tendency toward far too much emo-ing out in my opinion, except in their tertiary series, which I have a preference for on both sides of the fence. So much <3 for Runaways and Fables.

I like both I just side with Marvel because a girl I know likes DC so it makes it more fun, that and I've gotten tired of this "Batman can beat anyone" fad

 

[Geekiest]

I like both I just side with Marvel because a girl I know likes DC so it makes it more fun, that and I've gotten tired of this "Batman can beat anyone" fad

Well Batman, in his history, has had some of the best comic book writing out there. That's where that stems from. But I'm not huge fans of the title characters from either 'verse. X-Men comics are notoriously hard to sit through, although I love them in any medium that's not comic books. Superman in his own comics is difficult not to giggle at, but works well in tandem with other heroes in things like JLA. DC had Young Justice, Marvel had Runaways.

I was getting into Image for awhile, but I got tired of the Walking Dead writers kicking my love for characters in the face. Also, little things here and there like Courtney Crumrin from Oni Press and Dark Horse adaptations have been catching my attention away from the train wreck that is stuff like Civil War and the Death of Batman stuff in the big two.

 

[artanis_neravar]

I like both I just side with Marvel because a girl I know likes DC so it makes it more fun, that and I've gotten tired of this "Batman can beat anyone" fad

Well Batman, in his history, has had some of the best comic book writing out there. That's where that stems from. But I'm not huge fans of the title characters from either 'verse. X-Men comics are notoriously hard to sit through, although I love them in any medium that's not comic books. Superman in his own comics is difficult not to giggle at, but works well in tandem with other heroes in things like JLA. DC had Young Justice, Marvel had Runaways.

I was getting into Image for awhile, but I got tired of the Walking Dead writers kicking my love for characters in the face. Also, little things here and there like Courtney Crumrin from Oni Press and Dark Horse adaptations have been catching my attention away from the train wreck that is stuff like Civil War and the Death of Batman stuff in the big two.

I've wanted to read the Civil War stuff, is it really that bad? And all of my top Walking Dead Characters have lived so far, although I'm not holding my breathe for any of them

 

[Geekiest]

I've wanted to read the Civil War stuff, is it really that bad? And all of my top Walking Dead Characters have lived so far, although I'm not holding my breathe for any of them

It was politics and melodrama with complete disregard for years of character continuity. I couldn't stomach much of it, but I know from someone who read a good lot of it that it didn't get better.

Yeah, technically all my super-favorites have "lived" but we've outright been warned that might not last. I may borrow some copies from friends, but at this point I can't bring myself to buy any more bad news than I've already gotten.

 

[artanis_neravar]

I've wanted to read the Civil War stuff, is it really that bad? And all of my top Walking Dead Characters have lived so far, although I'm not holding my breathe for any of them

It was politics and melodrama with complete disregard for years of character continuity. I couldn't stomach much of it, but I know from someone who read a good lot of it that it didn't get better.

Yeah, technically all my super-favorites have "lived" but we've outright been warned that might not last. I may borrow some copies from friends, but at this point I can't bring myself to buy any more bad news than I've already gotten.

Well that is disappointing, I guess I'll skip that series then