America: Le Buk

[MinimanZombie]

When I was young my dad sat me down and told me;
"Son, one day you're gonna grow up. And you're gonna do some great things."
He was pretty overly optimistic about my future.

Without further ado, I present the ongoing book being written by the Mall Fight crew, with it's prime authors being me, MartinTox, and Sigma Castell. It's name is "America: Le Buk". It's a slice of life story featuring various characters and pov's, some of which may even be inspired by real world people (just read it and find out.) If you have any questions or suggestions, maybe you can leave them here, or message me. But I'd really rather you didn't.

enjoy. [https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dxtTWIDz3PTBMlTaYLSHtswHf21pEIqeKks-Bos6mfQ/edit?usp=sharing]

 

[ShindoL Shill]

It's about two pages too long for my tastes.

 

[Silence]

This is bad.

 

[Saelune]

Who...the fuck...are any of you?

Seriously, always weird when people with more posts than me pop up out of nowhere.

Edit: (Post is meant to be more humorous than hostile)

 

[Knife-28]

I am shocked. Shocked and appalled that you would deny my part in the creation of this literary work of art. For shame.

 

[Randomosity]

 

[Arnoxthe1]

Who...the fuck...are any of you?

Seriously, always weird when people with more posts than me pop up out of nowhere.

Edit: (Post is meant to be more humorous than hostile)

Yeah. What/who the hell is this? And why should we care?

 

[Drathnoxis]

I uh... what? What is this? It's so loooooong! And none of you have posted for years. Is this what you've been working on all this time? What even is this?! Why would you write this!? 502 pages!! Of.... this!1!! WHAT!?

Are you insane, on drugs, or just the edgiest, most ironic hipster of all time?

 

[bastardofmelbourne]

This reminds me a lot of Sweet Bro and Hella Jeff. [http://www.mspaintadventures.com/sweetbroandhellajeff/]

In a good way.

Edit: So far, I have been incapacitated by the following passages:

SHIT. I am falling down ALL THESE ESCAIATORS!

YOU CAN'T FLIM FLaM THE ZIM ZAM

It was too late for me to figure out that I had left the bath salts in the shower. It was too late for me to figure out that my dick had exploded after drinking too much booze from the Fountain of Youth.

 

[Chimpzy_v1legacy]

Read about a page and a half. Can only conclude this:

 

[Squilookle]

(just read it and find out.) If you have any questions or suggestions, maybe you can leave them here

Here's a suggestion- never ever say 'just read it' when trying to convince someone to read something.

 

[bastardofmelbourne]

I've finished it, and I can say that it appears to be a collaborative novel written with the overarching goal of intentionally producing the worst and most nonsensical book imaginable.

There is a rough plot involving a mission undertaken by a transsexual Joseph Stalin in order to stop President Lyndon B. Johnson from assassinating Michael Jackson. There is also an extended gag that seems to be about Shrek and Donkey - two characters from the "Shrek" film franchise - having an extremely repetitive conversation with a lesbian named Diane based around combining the words "lesbian" and "Diane" in humourous ways. This is followed by an eight-page segment that consists entirely of the words "randy dandy" and variations, such as "sprandy dandy", "harandy dandy", and "waterandy dandy." This segment and variations of it are repeated throughout the rest of the novel, such that it can be accurately said that a bulk of the novel's word count consists of the words "randy dandy" and variations.

The narrative is occasionally interrupted by non-sequiturs, such as an author's high school essay, entire chapters taken verbatim from Pride and Prejudice, and Toy Story erotic fanfiction. All in all, very entertaining read, 10/10 for absurdist humour, modern-day Finnegans Wake.

 

[MinimanZombie]

This is bad.

Noted.

Who...the fuck...are any of you?

well I'm minimanzombie and an author of America: Le Buk

I am shocked. Shocked and appalled that you would deny my part in the creation of this literary work of art. For shame.

It's what you deserve for what you did to Tox's credit score.

Yeah. What/who the hell is this? And why should we care?

So this is a book we did done did make, and we're the authors. We think it provides some good insight into contemporary concepts like anarcho-capitalism and radical leftist commercialism.

I uh... what? What is this? It's so loooooong! And none of you have posted for years. Is this what you've been working on all this time? What even is this?! Why would you write this!? 502 pages!! Of.... this!1!! WHAT!?

Are you insane, on drugs, or just the edgiest, most ironic hipster of all time?

Thanks for the input, we had to take several sabbaticals from the escapist while we researched and worked on this project. I'll now be back here handling most public relations.

Here's a suggestion- never ever say 'just read it' when trying to convince someone to read something.

Noted and ignored.

a beautifully written review, truly inspiring to all future readers who wish to tackle this

Here at our HQ we found ourselves with teary eyes over your gorgeously written response, check your inbox for the gift we sent to represent our joy.

 

[Arnoxthe1]

we had to take several sabbaticals from the escapist while we researched and worked on this project. I'll now be back here handling most public relations.

Yeah, you've been gone too long, friend. The Escapist is dead. It's only a matter of time before this site is either shut down or errors out.

 

[Neurotic Void Melody]

Is this just memes but isolated from the internet and concentrated into their very own safe space?

Because it looks exactly like memes but isolated from the internet and concentrated into their very own safe space.

 

[PsychedelicDiamond]

It's far from the worst thing I've ever read 500 pages of, if that means anything to you. It should be noted, though, that I've read all of Fallout Equestria and it'd be hard to compete with that.