"ARE YOU KIDDING ME!?" Most Retarded Endings. Spoilers (duh)

[CpT_x_Killsteal]

Well if you wanna get real fuckin' retarded-

Aldnoah Zero

Already brought up. Which is a good thing. Because it was retarded. I honestly thought it was gonna be a 24 episode season, then it just ends with the blue-balling of a lifetime.

Spoiler

Oh and Seylum's body went missing after that so Slaine's probably working on sci-fi necromancy in the already announced Season 2 because he was the only one left alive on the scene.

Good to know it's actually going to go somewhere. Who knows, could end up being great with the protagonist switch up. It's worked well before.

Either that or Gen Urobutcher just wanted to kill off some main characters.

Yeah it really had all the signs of a 24 episodes series too, there was enough potential for the plot to be stretched out that long without running out of material. Like that guy who had PTSD and had relapses whenever he got inside a mecha, it was building up to him getting over it in the future with therapy but nah, let's just leave that.

I think your last statement is the most likely. I hate how randomly killing main characters like it was nothing is becoming a somewhat common thing in battle anime now. Now I like Attack on Titan as much as the next guy but I have to wonder if it's having negative effects on the genre... It was like that in Akame ga Kill too, at least it feels that way. After the tone of Episode 1 i'm expecting mass character death (only on Episode 6 but I would be surprised if they don't.)

Slaine had such potential as a character too, so did Cruteo for that matter. Not two minutes after he realised how loyal Slaine actually is (it was a a kind of touching moment too) he gets deleted by that bullshit one man army Strausbaum before he can even get into his mecha.

What happened to good old Power of Friendship anime, man? I know it's cheesy as fuck but I love it when it's done right. It's like every anime is actively working against it now.

It feels like "the new thing" that's sweeping anime now. Killing off main characters is becoming the new thing. Not that it's necessarily a bad plot device, but the animes that mostly end up using it have such great characters. I watch oh so many harem, moe, semen demons shows, come across a show like Aldnoah Zero with superbly developed characters AND THEY ALL DIE. It just makes me sad. And Cruteo was so awesome too, full of hardcore loyalty. Then a loving heart warming moment happens, and they decide to bring down the axe (well, mecha with an inter-dimensional-shield-thingy) on his head. He was shaping up to be my favourite character too.

It's like they're working on extremes. It was all about friendship, no blood, no gore, ecchi, characters weren't all that deep, no one really died, not even the "villains". Then someone flipped a switch, so now we have these absolutely amazing anime with well fleshed out characters, but all of them die.

 

[Trucken]

It's supposed to be this emotional showdown as the two brothers battle each other, but it ends up being the dumbest fucking thing I've ever seen. "I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry," Joel Edgerton whispers to Tom Hardy right before he dislocates his brother's fucking shoulder.

*BREEP* I'm sorry, that is not the answer we were looking for.

Spoiler: Warrior

In all seriousness though, he doesn't say that. Edgerton has him in the hold, says "Come on, Tommy" (probably urging him to tap), receives a couple of elbows to the face, punches back, gets more elbows, applies pressure and dislocates the shoulder just before the round ends, immediately asks Tommy if he's OK and gets attacked.

But, when he applies the chokehold (after spending two rounds getting Tommy to quit, which you pointed out)(also, I'm not sure if he's really choking him or just holding him there) he says "I'm sorry, Tommy. I'm sorry... Tap, Tommy... It's OK. It's OK... I love you. I love you Tommy." After that Tommy taps out.

Now, OK, I loved Warrior, so I'm biased, but I really thought it worked. The movie wasn't really about what would happen after the tournament (we knew what would happen with the money regardless of who won), but more about the healing between the two brothers. Tommy felt betrayed by his brother since he didn't run away with him and their mother all those years ago just because he met "some girl" who ended up being his wife, which eventually led to Tommy taking care of their mother when she fell ill. To me it felt more like Edgerton apologizing to Tommy for betraying him, not for what he did to him in the fight, and Tommy forgiving him.

But, that's my interpretation of it, I don't know if it's the correct one.

While I've heard that from other people, it still just is too much of a disconnect between what they're trying to portray and what's happening on screen for me. They're trying to portray the brothers' healing, but it's healing by beating the shit out of each other? The only way they can heal is by one forcing the other into submission? "I forgive you, and I love you." /breaks arm.

I would honestly say that a fight sometimes can heal more than years of therapy could, even though I wouldn't recommend it. Also, the dislocation of the shoulder didn't seem intentional, and Brendan (Edgerton's character) seemed genuinely worried about Tommy when it happened. And once again, the whole "I'm sorry"-thing was after the shoulder popped.

Considering the "forgiveness" he showed Nick Nolte earlier ("I forgive you, now never speak to me or come near your grandkids again."), I don't think Edgerton knows what forgiveness means.

That was also the thing, Brendan was in the wrong about Tommy the entire movie. He told him "you forgave Pop but won't forgive me? I forgave you and mom!", showing that HE felt betrayed for them leaving him alone with their father when it was he who decided to stay. The "I'm sorry"-bit was him realizing why Tommy was feeling betrayed and that he (Brendan) was actually the one in the wrong.

And I needed to know more about the ending because otherwise it just looks like a cheap ploy to ratchet up the stakes for the brothers and the emotional drama for the audience without the consequences of good storytelling. "He might lose his job! He's a war hero! Wait a minute, he's a WANTED war hero!" There are serious implications here that just get tossed out the window. They HAD plenty of drama with the dynamic of the brothers, their parents, and their history. The rest just got in the way and ruined the ending by being brought up and then dropped.

I can't say that you're in the wrong here, I can only say that those things didn't bother me. Maybe because I drew my own conclusions after the movie (Tommy would get a slap on the wrist 'cause he was a war hero that saw his best friend get killed by friendly fire, Brendan would get his job back, and if he didn't he still had 5 fucking million dollars and was the Middleweight Champion of the world, why would he give a shit about a teaching job?) or maybe I just didn't consider those plot points that important. Honestly, I think I was just more interested in who would win.

Now, I'm certain I haven't said anything that you haven't heard before, I'm just saying how I see it. If you don't like the movie, well that's fine.

 

[Candidus]

Snip

My biggest problem with Aldnoah's ending is WHY it was ruined. The fact that it is clearly an attempt by the director, who is a former hentai writer, to beat his friend and colleague Gen Uro-butcher at his own game is just such a sad reason for Aldnoah Zero to fail as a piece of storytelling.

Look at Gen's work. Madoka and Fate Zero. They were tragedy dramas, and nobody with any sense expected a happy ending from them. They built and related to a certain kind of audience and they didn't betray that audience by changing the whole fucking genre at the last second. That's Gen, doing it right.

Aldnoah Zero was an action drama. It built and related to a completely different type of audience (or if you're like me, and a fan of both genres, you're at least viewing Aldnoah in a different mindset).

When the last 40 seconds wrenched the whole plot from action drama to fucking Shakespearean tragedy, I wasn't shocked at all! Nope. Instead, I was alienated completely.

Tonally it had pretty much nothing in common with the events of the rest of the show, nor was it foreshadowed in the build-up. Pulling a surprise under those circumstances usually makes your readers/listeners/watchers feel less like they've been told a story and more like they've been pranked-- which is how I felt.

That's BAD STORYTELLING. Objectively horrible storytelling.

Eughh. Needless to say I won't be there for season 2 unless they phoenix-down Asseylum. And even then, I'll wait until the end of the season and binge it only if I hear that it was handled better.

 

[ninja51]

The ending of Battlestar Galactica really really bugged me. I'm talking about the newer reimagined tv show, a straight naval military drama in space. As the show goes on, so many cool interesting ideas and mysteries are built up, who are the final cylons? How is Kara alive? Who is this lost cyclon model they only mention? Whats going on with the half cylon daughter and the opera house? How are all these sweet pieces of this grand and elaborate puzzle going to fit together?!

Then the show just ends. Everyone just shoots each other and Kara just gets a flick of inspiration and takes them to new new earth. On new new earth they decide FOR NO REASON AT ALL to give up technology entirely, and neatly remove all traces of their time as human beings in space, which every single human is up for, and return to a freaking hunter/gather society! The show throws an anti-technology message at you in the last 10 minutes in one of the strangest most out of the blue shifts in character opinion I've ever seen. All the grand mystery of how and why and who is orchestrating these crazy events is thrown out the window to wrap up the entire show. Kara herself is more conflicted than anyone as to what she is and why and then she just gets it and disappears into thin air. I was even bracing myself for the god ending, I knew from the first time they were going after earth they would somehow turn out to be our ancestors as well, but I wasn't prepared for how lazy an ending they would present to me.

All the threads that make the show so interesting turn out to have no bearing on the ending of the story, instead the only significance of any of the characters crazy dreams or motivations seems to be getting the little girl to draw dots. Thats retarded.

 

[Cronenberg1]

Movies - The Amazing Spiderman 2

The guy who will become Rhino is introduced pretty early on so you're waiting for Rhino to show up.And he does at the very end of the movie.Spiderman and Rhino start to fight and then....cut to credits.Are you fucking serious!?!I'm waiting nearly 2 fucking hours for this villain to show up and when he finally does you end the movie in the middle of a fucking fight scene between the hero and villain.Fuck you.The sooner Sony loses the rights to this franchise the better

Not to mention that it completely blows off the death of one of the main characters. The whole movie leads up to this supposedly big important death, instead he's just sad for a little bit then gets over it, forgets about her and the movie ends. The Amazing Spiderman movies have always had confusingly bad endings. Remember the "But those are the best kind" ending from the first Amazing Spiderman? They've pretty much unintentionally turned Peter into a sociopath at this point.

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

Neon Genesis Evangelion.

I don't even... want to go into why.

The last episode of Firefly also constitutes, as it had an unnecessarily jarring shift of tone... for no reason.

 

[Kontarek]

Warrior

100 percent agree on that one. Personally, I thought the dumbest thing was the idea that the teacher character would've had any fucking chance at all against Koba (the Russian Gregor Clegane) or Tom Hardy's character. We've seen Tom Hardy laying out these other pro fighters with ONE FUCKING PUNCH; how is it that a guy so new to MMA and so scrawny looking could even survive for more than a minute against that?

I think it would've made more sense to have Tom Hardy fight Koba, and have it be this really brutal and close match where Tom Hardy wins but gets his arm injured in the process. That way his brother, the scrawny teacher, would've had a more believable chance of winning the final.

Instead we get the predictable "underdog wins against all odds and the laws of physics because he just goddamn WANTS IT more than everyone else." I don't care how bad you want it; you're never going to win against pro fighters without years of training.

 

[Vykrel]

i know it is popular to hate on it, but Mass Effect 3's ending really was atrocious. ill never understand why so many people fail to see that. it negates everything the player has accomplished over the three games, and the Star Child's logic is completely ridiculous.

"i have to use my synthetics to kill you organics so that you arent killed by your own synthetics". this logic is made even more unsound by the fact you are can bring peace among the Quarian and the Geth after less than a friggin year.

really, just a god awful ending. i remember starting a second playthrough of ME2 the day after i beat it, but i still havent been able to bring myself to revisit the series, now that i have seen how it ends. it was all just so pointless. nothing mattered.

 

[Guitarmasterx7]

Half the horror movies I've seen have shat the bath in the last half hour. It's (understandably) very difficult to remove the fog of mystery from a mysterious evil creature and still have it be scary. Still though, horror movie bad endings are really in a league of their own honestly. There's almost always a huge twist that doesn't work or a reveal that makes the monster seem lame and retroactively undermines the rest of the movie.

 

[The Wykydtron]

Snip

My biggest problem with Aldnoah's ending is WHY it was ruined. The fact that it is clearly an attempt by the director, who is a former hentai writer, to beat his friend and colleague Gen Uro-butcher at his own game is just such a sad reason for Aldnoah Zero to fail as a piece of storytelling.

Look at Gen's work. Madoka and Fate Zero. They were tragedy dramas, and nobody with any sense expected a happy ending from them. They built and related to a certain kind of audience and they didn't betray that audience by changing the whole fucking genre at the last second. That's Gen, doing it right.

Aldnoah Zero was an action drama. It built and related to a completely different type of audience (or if you're like me, and a fan of both genres, you're at least viewing Aldnoah in a different mindset).

When the last 40 seconds wrenched the whole plot from action drama to fucking Shakespearean tragedy, I wasn't shocked at all! Nope. Instead, I was alienated completely.

Tonally it had pretty much nothing in common with the events of the rest of the show, nor was it foreshadowed in the build-up. Pulling a surprise under those circumstances usually makes your readers/listeners/watchers feel less like they've been told a story and more like they've been pranked-- which is how I felt.

That's BAD STORYTELLING. Objectively horrible storytelling.

Eughh. Needless to say I won't be there for season 2 unless they phoenix-down Asseylum. And even then, I'll wait until the end of the season and binge it only if I hear it's handled better.

Oh dear yeah, Shakespearean is actually a good word to describe the ending. Fuck that's a bad sign, I hate Shakespeare...

Speaking of out of tone prank like endings, at least it wasn't as bad as Panty & Stocking's ending where Gainex just decided to troll the living fuck out of the audience in the last few minutes. That was so random I still don't know how to react to it years later.

Ah well, that least the new anime season is lookin' good. I just watched Grisaia no Kaijitsu and as a massive fan of the Visual Novel i'm impressed at how good it is. I see that pixel perfect dorm lobby and Yuuji's awfully bland room copied perfectly in every detail in animated form and i'm already into it. Not to mention they appear to have nailed Yuuji's character and gave him a good voice to match him. This is mandatory for the adaptation to be anywhere near successful

Also Michiru in motion is worth it. The entire anime adaptation could fail badly but I get to see Best Girl Michiru in animation so it's fine.

 

[Pyrian]

So our heroes have the government goons cornered with an army of policemen and only have to arrest them whereupon, this happens:

Lol! Awesome. I wouldn't want to watch that movie, but I'm kind of glad that ending exists.

 

[Nooners]

The last episode of Firefly also constitutes, as it had an unnecessarily jarring shift of tone... for no reason.

To be fair, though, that wasn't supposed to be the last episode. So it's not entirely fair to blame Joss and crew after FOX screwed them over so hard.

 

[Silvanus]

There are some ridiculous ones mentioned so far, but none as bad as Hannibal's.

Clarice Starling has been hunting serial killers for two books, now. She is disgusted by what they do; she's driven by her moral sense of responsibility to overcome the barriers she faces and bring these monsters to justice.

Then, at the end of Hannibal, she gets together with Hannibal fucking Lecter. She's sick of Decker's attitude, sure, but it is still absurdly out-of-character for her to be fine with Hannibal gruesomely murdering him, and then to get together with him. She should revile him. She was always intrigued by his mind, sure, but not in a bloody romantic way.

 

[shootthebandit]

Monty Python and the Holy Grail. Apparently, they ran out of money.

Now, the ending they did go for was in touch with their surrealist humour, something they could do that few other movies could, it really, really did not work. You'll note almost the entirety of that movie gets quoted line for line, just not so much the ending.

In fairness, a lot of their stuff was experimental, and thus not all of it was going to work, but that was a particularly poor bit.

I really don't think it's that bad, sure they ran out of money, but how else do you end it? They find the grail? they charge (again) the 2nd french castle?

Apparently, yeah, they were going to attack the castle in a giant battle, with swallows dropping coconuts and stuff.

But first they'd have to calculate the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow

 

[flying_whimsy]

Chocolate (the thai action movie about an autistic girl that kicks the shit out of a bunch of mobsters) always left a little bit of a bad taste in my mouth. The girl deserved a happy ending, but I'm not sure sending her off into the sunset with her estranged father and completely leaving out the best friend that was the only person that actually understood her as a person was a good way to give it to her. Would have been a five star movie otherwise.

In general, I like my happy endings, and it annoyed me a lot during the early to late part of the 2000's decade when most movies and shows decided to have a downer ending for the feels. Characters dying for no other reason than to provoke a response really pisses me off. So when I say I hated the endings to Kill-la-Kill and Gurren Laggan, I hope you understand why; there's too many other movies and tv shows for me to mention that pulled this crap. Why can't we just give these heroes a happy ending instead of breaking them down even more? Even the Halo games pulled this crap with Cortana.

For bioshock infinite, I actually really loved almost everything they did in both the main game and the dlcs. My only real issue was when they brought it back around to the original bioshock, and it definitely left me sitting there swearing at the game. I always have a hard time when a movie or game (especially a sequel) makes something greater of itself and either doesn't realize it or puts itself back into the little box it thought it was supposed to fit into. Talk about a sour note to end on.

In an inverse of the thread title (Are you kidding me? that shitty movie had a great ending), I'd like to mention Skyline. A movie about a group of spoiled rich people caught up in an alien invasion. Terrible dialogue, terrible characters, and pretty good special effects (typical hallmarks of a modern blockbuster dud). When the overweight condo security guy is the most badass person in the movie you know things have gone horribly wrong. Anyway, in the end everyone is captured or killed, and the 'hero' of the story gets his brain ripped out and put into an alien body (they use our brains as computers). What follows as mostly a montage over the end credits is him becoming an unstoppable force of rage as he rescues his girlfriend (whom he just found out was pregnant). I absolutely hated the movie up until that point, and it's kind of funny to say my favorite part was when the credits rolled in a non-snarky way. To this day I have a softspot just for that ending; almost makes the rest of the film tolerable.

 

[McMindflayer]

i know it is popular to hate on it, but Mass Effect 3's ending really was atrocious. ill never understand why so many people fail to see that. it negates everything the player has accomplished over the three games, and the Star Child's logic is completely ridiculous.

"i have to use my synthetics to kill you organics so that you arent killed by your own synthetics". this logic is made even more unsound by the fact you are can bring peace among the Quarian and the Geth after less than a friggin year.

really, just a god awful ending. i remember starting a second playthrough of ME2 the day after i beat it, but i still havent been able to bring myself to revisit the series, now that i have seen how it ends. it was all just so pointless. nothing mattered.

First of all: I agree that the ending is bad. but this failure to understand the logic behind the star child is stupid.
Synthetics have zero need for organic life. So if we make AI, and then, inevitably, war with them, what will they do? They will wipe out all the people. But, since they don't want to do this again, they will continue to wipe out any new organic people who might show back up.
Reapers, on the other hand, show up and kill all advanced life, including the synthetics. They then leave. So when they did their thing on the protheans, they didn't destroy humans, asari, krogans, etc who were all in their infancy. The reapers job is to let life grow without malicious AI(I understand the irony) coming in and destroying all life.

This is still stupid with the ability to make peace with the geth, and the general theme of the game being that AI and organics can live in peace. (see EDI and Joker) but it's not completely illogical.

 

[Sigmund Av Volsung]

The last episode of Firefly also constitutes, as it had an unnecessarily jarring shift of tone... for no reason.

To be fair, though, that wasn't supposed to be the last episode. So it's not entirely fair to blame Joss and crew after FOX screwed them over so hard.

Yeah, I know that much...but that bounty hunter dude was just...

It's like Joss Whedon was doing shrooms whilst reading The King In Yellow.

"Oh hey guys, you know what would fit well into our Space Opera Western about a ragtag bunch of misfits trying to make a living?"

 

[Tony2077]

i know it is popular to hate on it, but Mass Effect 3's ending really was atrocious. ill never understand why so many people fail to see that. it negates everything the player has accomplished over the three games, and the Star Child's logic is completely ridiculous.

"i have to use my synthetics to kill you organics so that you arent killed by your own synthetics". this logic is made even more unsound by the fact you are can bring peace among the Quarian and the Geth after less than a friggin year.

really, just a god awful ending. i remember starting a second playthrough of ME2 the day after i beat it, but i still havent been able to bring myself to revisit the series, now that i have seen how it ends. it was all just so pointless. nothing mattered.

First of all: I agree that the ending is bad. but this failure to understand the logic behind the star child is stupid.
Synthetics have zero need for organic life. So if we make AI, and then, inevitably, war with them, what will they do? They will wipe out all the people. But, since they don't want to do this again, they will continue to wipe out any new organic people who might show back up.
Reapers, on the other hand, show up and kill all advanced life, including the synthetics. They then leave. So when they did their thing on the protheans, they didn't destroy humans, asari, krogans, etc who were all in their infancy. The reapers job is to let life grow without malicious AI(I understand the irony) coming in and destroying all life.

This is still stupid with the ability to make peace with the geth, and the general theme of the game being that AI and organics can live in peace. (see EDI and Joker) but it's not completely illogical.

i know of another EDI and joker like romance the main couple from appleseed she's human he's a bunny eared cyborg

 

[Mikeybb]

Return of the Jedi Remastered; CGI'ing Hayden in makes no logical sense.

Quoted to agree.
I saw that and thought "Wait a minute. If you're evil, you get to stay young?"

So many eighties movies threw in a 'to be continued' ending that picking one of them would leaves me spoiled for choice.
Some even threw in 'the end' with a fade in of a question mark.
Unironically.
I repeat.
Faded in.
A Question mark.
Without irony.

So, I'm going to pick something a little more modern, as a result I'll try to be as spoiler free as possible

The happening.
A movie so stupid it radiates moron particles straight from the screen.
...but it saves the best for last.

The few survivors figure out what happened regarding the disaster during their attempts to escape.
The disaster in question displayed in most absolute fashion possible, certain things possess the hitherto unknown ability to fill the air full of toxins when triggered by unknown parameters.
Nobody is sure what exactly these triggers are, or if there are more such triggers that could fire off at any time.

So the survivors promptly move into a place surrounded by these things.
Absolutely surrounded.
Instead of a hermetically sealed bunker.
Then again, having sat through that movie I have to admit my preservation instincts were waning too.

They also don't bother telling any other countries about what happened as the pre credit twist shows us.
Why?
Who cares!
The audience LOVE a twist ending!

 

[laggyteabag]

Dragon Age 2. For a game based around choice, the conclusion to Act 3 was the same regardless of choice. If you side with the Mages, Orsino resorts to blood magic, then Meredith goes crazy because of red lyrium. Then the mages rise up all around Thedas.
If you side with the Templars, Orsino resorts to blood magic, then Meredith goes crazy because of red Lyrium. Then the mages rise up all around Thedas.
It seemed pretty stupid, especially considering that Orsino was the First Enchanter, and the front runner for the whole "Not all mages are evil and use blood magic", and how Meredith was slowly going mad, and then just went crazy with no real space in between. Also, the ending for both Mages and Templars states that "the Templars could be defied."; Well no. If you side with the Templars, you go around and kill all of the mages in the Tower, they dont defy anyone, because they are dead.