Bi-sexuality.

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Shraggler

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I am 100% straight. I am not sexually attracted towards males in any way.

That being said, I know when a male is attractive. You'd have to be a poor observer or an idiot not to recognize the difference between an unattractive and attractive man. Most of us men know what an attractive man looks like because we either are one ourselves or aspire to be one.
 

Sightless Wisdom

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Jul 24, 2009
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Sexuality... it still doesn't matter... nor has it ever. Bi-sexuality might actually make more sense in terms of relationship practicality. If you want to be in a relationship with someone and you only like the opposite sex then you're limiting yourself to a much smaller number than the total of both sexes. Of course it's not really something you consciously choose so practicality doesn't really apply, but I'm only talking about it because sexuality really doesn't matter... at all.
 

tseroff

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Scarecrow 8 said:
treeboy027 said:
'sigh'...people used to beat me up for being bi, and I would ask them why and they would say exactly what you just said...almost word for word.
Well that sucks. Really, I think it's stupid when people get beat up over crap like this. It may not sound like much coming from someone with obviously different views, but I do believe that everyone has the right to their own choices and opinions, and even if I don't agree with them, you have the right to make them without being deprived of simple human courtesies. So you have my condolences, friend.
kevo.mf.last said:
what about the sex? homosexual sex happens all the time in nature.
If your going to say that you think sex should only be for procreation well then your going to live a very miserable life.
I don't believe that sex is merely for procreation, I just believe that it should be between a man and woman. There isn't a real reason for this one besides "the Bible says" but with research, I could probably find a few. Sometimes, though, faith just has to be enough, and I apologize for not coming up with a better answer.
Dexiro said:
I'd argue that there are 3 types of love; sexual, friendship and unconditional.

People of all sexual orientations can experience these 3 kinds of love, the only element that changes is who they feel sexual attraction towards.

Bisexual people can feel strong sexual, friendship or unconditional love towards either sex.
That's a great point. Thanks for bringing that up. I guess it just comes down to belief sometimes.
CoverYourHead said:
In my experience, both personally and from other bisexuals, the sex thing isn't as you describe it. Rather, bisexuals feel the ability to connect on the kind of personal, intimate level that heterosexuals and homosexuals find with their partners, just with both sexes. Really, it isn't just "Man, I'm so horny... I'd sleep with a guy OR a girl right now." It's just the ability to be emotionally and physically attracted to people of both genders.

That's my two cents anyway.
I see what you're saying. I didn't mean to come across like saying it's just about sex, because I know that it's not. I meant that the sex is what puts me off the most. Most of the other reasons, I'm actually okay with. I just don't approve of the overall practice.
/responses
Well thanks for the responses, Escapists. They were pretty enlightening, and I'm glad you shared your opinions with me. And here's my analogy, if anyone cares:
I treat homosexuality like I do suicide. (Not to compare the two, it's just an analogy.) I don't really approve of it and would never do it myself, but I understand why people do it. Sorry if that offends you, my analogies are usually pretty shallow. Hey, thanks for listening to my opinion, anyways. So until next time, Peace Out!
 

Dexiro

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treeboy027 said:
kevo.mf.last said:
what about the sex? homosexual sex happens all the time in nature.
If your going to say that you think sex should only be for procreation well then your going to live a very miserable life.
I don't believe that sex is merely for procreation, I just believe that it should be between a man and woman. There isn't a real reason for this one besides "the Bible says" but with research, I could probably find a few. Sometimes, though, faith just has to be enough, and I apologize for not coming up with a better answer.
There really isn't any reasons against homosexual sex other than "the Bible says".

Really most other reasons seem to boil down to that person thinking gay sex is gross, and they're just not accustomed to the idea like some people are. Evidently some people think it's equivalent to something like bestiality, when really it isn't.

A message to all Christians, if you're going to use "the Bible says" as a reason against homosexuality then at the very least don't let that affect them. The Bible shouldn't become an excuse to ruin other peoples lives.
 

tseroff

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Dexiro said:
treeboy027 said:
kevo.mf.last said:
what about the sex? homosexual sex happens all the time in nature.
If your going to say that you think sex should only be for procreation well then your going to live a very miserable life.
I don't believe that sex is merely for procreation, I just believe that it should be between a man and woman. There isn't a real reason for this one besides "the Bible says" but with research, I could probably find a few. Sometimes, though, faith just has to be enough, and I apologize for not coming up with a better answer.
There really isn't any reasons against homosexual sex other than "the Bible says".

Really most other reasons seem to boil down to that person thinking gay sex is gross, and they're just not accustomed to the idea like some people are. Evidently some people think it's equivalent to something like bestiality, when really it isn't.

A message to all Christians, if you're going to use "the Bible says" as a reason against homosexuality then at the very least don't let that affect them. The Bible shouldn't become an excuse to ruin other peoples lives.
If you bothered to read the rest of my post, I think I said something along the lines of:
treeboy027 said:
It may not sound like much coming from someone with obviously different views, but I do believe that everyone has the right to their own choices and opinions, and even if I don't agree with them, you have the right to make them without being deprived of simple human courtesies.
 

CatComixzStudios

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I'm bisexual myself, but I don't think it's as much about the lust part of it. I just know that I can love someone if they're a guy or girl. It's not as much about the sexual part of it (though of course that's there). There's nothing wrong with love, is there? =)
 

Dexiro

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treeboy027 said:
Dexiro said:
treeboy027 said:
kevo.mf.last said:
what about the sex? homosexual sex happens all the time in nature.
If your going to say that you think sex should only be for procreation well then your going to live a very miserable life.
I don't believe that sex is merely for procreation, I just believe that it should be between a man and woman. There isn't a real reason for this one besides "the Bible says" but with research, I could probably find a few. Sometimes, though, faith just has to be enough, and I apologize for not coming up with a better answer.
There really isn't any reasons against homosexual sex other than "the Bible says".

Really most other reasons seem to boil down to that person thinking gay sex is gross, and they're just not accustomed to the idea like some people are. Evidently some people think it's equivalent to something like bestiality, when really it isn't.

A message to all Christians, if you're going to use "the Bible says" as a reason against homosexuality then at the very least don't let that affect them. The Bible shouldn't become an excuse to ruin other peoples lives.
If you bothered to read the rest of my post, I think I said something along the lines of:
treeboy027 said:
It may not sound like much coming from someone with obviously different views, but I do believe that everyone has the right to their own choices and opinions, and even if I don't agree with them, you have the right to make them without being deprived of simple human courtesies.
I was mostly directing that post towards Christians in general. Hence "A message to all Christians".
 

tseroff

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Dexiro said:
treeboy027 said:
Dexiro said:
treeboy027 said:
kevo.mf.last said:
what about the sex? homosexual sex happens all the time in nature.
If your going to say that you think sex should only be for procreation well then your going to live a very miserable life.
I don't believe that sex is merely for procreation, I just believe that it should be between a man and woman. There isn't a real reason for this one besides "the Bible says" but with research, I could probably find a few. Sometimes, though, faith just has to be enough, and I apologize for not coming up with a better answer.
There really isn't any reasons against homosexual sex other than "the Bible says".

Really most other reasons seem to boil down to that person thinking gay sex is gross, and they're just not accustomed to the idea like some people are. Evidently some people think it's equivalent to something like bestiality, when really it isn't.

A message to all Christians, if you're going to use "the Bible says" as a reason against homosexuality then at the very least don't let that affect them. The Bible shouldn't become an excuse to ruin other peoples lives.
If you bothered to read the rest of my post, I think I said something along the lines of:
treeboy027 said:
It may not sound like much coming from someone with obviously different views, but I do believe that everyone has the right to their own choices and opinions, and even if I don't agree with them, you have the right to make them without being deprived of simple human courtesies.
I was mostly directing that post towards Christians in general. Hence "A message to all Christians".
Well two can play at this game. As I clearly say I don't do that, and you seem to acknowledge it, then we can fairly assume that "all Christians" doesn't apply. /(really short)rant.
And I apologize for my sardonicism. (to mods as well.)
 

Something Amyss

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CatComixzStudios said:
I'm bisexual myself, but I don't think it's as much about the lust part of it. I just know that I can love someone if they're a guy or girl. It's not as much about the sexual part of it (though of course that's there). There's nothing wrong with love, is there? =)
Another extension of homosexuality myths. Gays can't keep it in their pants. Bisexuals, since they like two sexes, can only be twice as bad, MIRITE?

Seriously, I'm bisexual (technically pansexual, really, but for the sake of this argument) and most people don't notice. Not because I'm "in the closet" or anything, but because I've never tried to nail everything that moves.
 
Jun 23, 2008
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It seems this thread is lousy with misconceptions. Maybe I can clear some of them up.

Firstly, bisexuality is only the ability to interface with both men and women on a romantic or sexual level.

Attached to bisexuality are no other characteristics, such as high libido, or the inability to sustain a monogamous relationship. Similarly, gay men are not all rapists, nor all child molesters, nor all promiscuous (as is still assumed by much of the the US, and even more of the world).

Bis are among the most discriminated against, of all the sexual subsects. Not only do phobic hets regard them as gay-by-default, but unthinking (or at least ignorant) gays regard them as traitors-to-the-cause, ergo, few bis will reveal themselves to questionable company. In parts of the San Francisco lesbian community, Bi is regarded as a perjorative epithet, hence many lesbians play with boys sometimes, but are never bi.

Similarly, though, het males in US culture (let alone anywhere else in the world) are often so afraid of being even slightly gay that many are in complete denial of their own homoerotic interests (something akin to the gay panic [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/One-drop_rule] (The propositioning gay is outing the straight to himself). The stigma of homosexuality is severe enough that it could easily account for many (if not all) of the proclamations on this thread of pure, absolute hetero-normativity, argued ad baculum.

(Considering the modal [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mode_(statistics)] demographic of The Escapist, I would expect a large portion of us to be precoital and most of those that remain, new enough to sex and attraction to not be fully familiar with their full gamut of paraphilias. Juxtapose to what actually appears in the thread.)

Bis do not easily fit into a single category. Some bis have only dated women, some only men, some have had plenty of lovers of one sex, only one (or a couple) of the other. Some have had an even mix of partners. Some go through boy phases and girl phases. Some are attracted to both all the time. Some are intrinsically monogamous (or at least serial monogamists, breaking each relationship before considering the next). Some are casual sex [http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory] (or casual sex with one, yet committed sex with the other). Some are not sexually active at all.

(As a side note, while dispelling myths, monogamy is considered normal in the 20th century and the contemporary era. But it is atypical of humankind at large. While premarital or extramarital affairs have been considered abbherent throughout Europe during the middle ages--thank the Church for that one--this hardly stopped everyone from bedding their neighbors, and their neighbors' wives, and their neighbors' daughters, and their neighbor's lifestock.? And in plenty of classical eras, including the old-testament biblical times, men were allowed to have and share concubines, as well as their wives--that's plural, as in polygyny--although women were expected to be chaste to a single man, yet often were not, opportunities willing. And many classical European cultures seasoned their year with holidays in which sexual restrictions were lifted, and anyone could boff anyone they wanted. Consent was frequently optional, at that.)

? It's my understanding, incidentally, that bovine calves give pretty excellent blowjobs, to the delight of many an experimentally-inclined pubescent farmhand. But you didn't hear / read it from me. Interestingly, most men are quicker to score themselves a wide-screen telly sooner than a calf. Maybe it's because the upkeep is cheaper.
 

Bara_no_Hime

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Pointer said:
Bara_no_Hime said:
Pointer said:
People that are bisexual are greedy. They want a hot dog and a taco and they want it now.

If you are bi this is not meant as an insult, imma just let you know that the above is true. For example one girl I know dates men for sex and women for cuddling. She gets the best of both worlds without the annoyances of the others. Think about your relationships and you will find the pattern to be true.
Um... no, I won't. Because I'm a bisexual, and I love sex with women. I also love sex with men. I don't get up after getting laid and run off to someone else - not only is that silly, it's impolite.

I also have been with the same partner (not telling you which gender) for the past 8 years. Sometime we arrange for a "guest" in the bedroom (my partner is also bi) to mix things up, but 90% of the time I am with my partner and I get everything I want or need.
See this is where I have to stop you and say that you are in a situation that would not happen for the overwhelming majority of the populace. Even being able to set up a threesome is probably beyond the average man or woman, regardless of their tastes. And the fact that you call that "spice" in your sex life really just undermines the whole "I'm not greedy" thing. I'm not saying you are a bad person or anything, I'm just saying you want and regularly get the best of both worlds. You even visit a third world and get things that few ever do.
First off, read your original post. I was stating that I didn't find sex with men superior or only turn to women for "cuddling" - which your post implied. I also dislike the deeper premis that I can't get everything I want out of a single partner. For the last 8 years, I have. Does that include a fairly interesting sex life? Yes. But I'm still getting that from a single romantic partner who enjoys and participates in the same. Thus, if I look "at my relationship pattern" I do not find your statment true.

Secondly, as mentioned in another post of mine above, being a slut has nothing to do with being bisexual. I was bisexual long before I was sexually active.

In the first kiss thread, I mentioned that I didn't have my first kiss until I was 17. This is because I used to be a shy, nerdy, A grade getting, socially inept wall-flower. I was still bisexual then (although I didn't know the term existed). I just couldn't get a date to save my life.

So how could I have been greedy? I spent years with nothing to "eat" at all. When I finally started "eating" (in college) I tried both "hot dogs" and "tacos" and both were good. I only ever had one at a time, though, often with long gaps between samplings.

After college, I met someone who had similar inclinations. Have I had an awesome sex life since then? Yes. But that is more because my partner and I have amazing sexual chemestry, and like lots of the same stuff.

So stop calling me (or other bisexuals) greedy. Most straight people I know have had MORE sexual partners than I have. Just because I pick from both genders doesn't mean I pick more people.
 

wolfchylde

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Dexiro said:
Really most other reasons seem to boil down to that person thinking gay sex is gross, and they're just not accustomed to the idea like some people are. Evidently some people think it's equivalent to something like bestiality, when really it isn't.
A lot of the 'gay sex is gross' *seems* to stem from just having a ton of pre-conceived notions about gay sex (or any sort of homosexual behavior).

Another example of your argument can be found in cuisine: We eat stuff people from other cultures would gag at, and HOO BOY do you see lots of things people eat in other cultures/countries that we'd have to be *paid* to eat :) Cultural influence can't be overlooked in discussing people's sexuality. ;)
 

wolfchylde

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Okay friend of mine who's been following this over my shoulder asks: So where in the scheme of things does cuddling fit? He identifies as mostly straight, but will pretty much cuddle with any gender because he likes cuddling that much. I must admit that for straight guy he has no physical hangups about leaning up against other guys OR gals, and doesn't really seem to prefer one over the other. So is there an accepted level of physical intimacy we've decided is required before we start wandering into sexuality territory (hopefully I didn't just confuse the shit out of any readers here :/ )
 

Hawk eye1466

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My policy is I can be friends with just about anyone and I dont care if your gay straight or bi if you come on to me and dont know I'll just say im not gay and we are still friends but if you keep trying i will get annoyed
but i really couldnt care less about what you do in your bedroom thats your own business
 

SirDoom

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Bara_no_Hime said:
Did you even bother reading the first part of my post, where I rail against the terms? I assumed after that, I could say "somewhere in the middle" without the fairly obvious "somewhere in the middle of what society perceives as straight and what they perceive as bisexual". I guess not.

In any case, I WOULD consider myself between those technically (well, on one axis, anyway). Like I said, I don't like any of the terms, and I am certainly not any of the three. I don't like guys, girls, or both. I like certain traits, regardless of gender.

As for the Kinsey scale, personally, I find it to be a worthless piece of garbage. You can't define all human sexualities on a 0-6 scale, and saying "This scale is right!" is just as misinformed as saying, say "You're either straight or gay, and there's no middle ground!"
At any given time, I am between 0 and 6 on that scale, never staying in one spot for too long. That's because the scale runs on a line- The more straight you are, the farther to the left you are, and the more gay you are, the farther to the right.

Honestly, the closest definition to what I actually am is pansexual, but if I said that nobody would know what the hell I was talking about. So I tried to shove my views somewhere on that linear axis... fail.
 

Fawcks

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Doctor Glocktor said:
I'm wondering if the stereotype that bi people are more likely to cheat is true.

Anyone wanna confirm/deny this?
I was engaged for two years and was entirely faithful to my spouse for all four years.

Outside of a relationship, I am pretty easy, I'll admit. But inside a relationship? 100% devoted.
 

Thespian

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Observing this thread, I was reminded of an interesting seminar I attended on Human Sexuality.
I think it's important to note that Sexuality and Romance and Love are not all intertwined. I think it's quite possible to love someone even if there is no romance there due to sexuality, just as we all know it's possible to Sexually Romance someone without Loving them. Likewise, it is quite ordinary to Romantically Love someone without wanting to get involved with them Sexually. Sometimes, people just want to cuddle. Sometimes people strongly love their friends. This all varies. I dunno, just a little tidbit.

Also:

Doomlord1375 said:
Hai ther.
I've been following your posts, and I must say I applaud your open-mindedness and your refusal to conform, but I think your view is slightly flawed.

First of all, the Kinsey Scale never claimed to include every single person. Keep in mind it was made in the 1950s. Prior to Kinsey's research, there was absolutely no comprehensive work done on human sexuality. Everything was kept quiet and under wraps, don't ask don't tell. Thus, Kinsey's scale is but a base for more work to be done upon, and it is actually highly effective at "classifying" human sexuality.

However, if you look at some additions to Kinsey's Scale (as well as 0-6, it now includes "X", being asexual or non-sexual - a good start) or some of the later versions (Benjamin's Sexual Orientation Scale, or SOS, which includes transsexualism) you will find that they expressly explain that "the seven types cannot be sharply separated", "Males do not represent two discrete populations, heterosexual and homosexual. The world is not to be divided into sheep and goats. It is a fundamental of taxonomy that nature rarely deals with discrete categories... The living world is a continuum in each and every one of its aspects." and finally "An individual may be assigned a position on this scale, for each period in his life. A seven-point scale comes nearer to showing the many gradations that actually exist."

(actually, Kinsey himself said the final two)

So you see, the Scale understands that the varying forms of sexuality are not sharply distinguishable, can be applied differently during different times in someone's life (as you said) and most of all that it is not perfect, but a seven point scale is better than nothing. This happens all the time in Science, we have to make certain assumptions due to the fact that no form of classification will be 100% accurate. To every rule there is an exception.
 

Crazycat690

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binnsyboy said:
Crazycat690 said:
Well since the thread creator no longer say what the thread is about I am unable to reply.

I have no problem with any kind of sexuality, being an atheist I'm open-minded and tolerant =) It's not wrong, greedy or against nature since it occurs among other animals too.
Basically all male giraffes are bisexual, leaning in favor of homosexual. The species reproduces from the roughly 1/5 sexual encounters for the average male giraffe that is with a female.

I don't care what sexuality people are. "Whatever floats your boat." (As long as it's legal.)
Now that's interesting :D
 

Bara_no_Hime

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Doomlord1375 said:
In any case, I WOULD consider myself between those technically (well, on one axis, anyway). Like I said, I don't like any of the terms, and I am certainly not any of the three. I don't like guys, girls, or both. I like certain traits, regardless of gender.
**blinks**

And obviously all straight people are attracted to ALL people of the opposite gender.
And all bisexuals are attracted to all guys and girls.

**pauses for effect**

Clearly that is not true. I like some guys, and I like some girls, dependant on their traits. "I like certain traits, regardless of gender" is how most people define bisexual.

As for the scale, I'm not a huge proponent of it. It's a useful tool, but also an outdated tool. It IS 50+ years old. Might be time for an updated version that uses the current society as a basis, rather than the 1950s. However, it does make discussions easier (common ground, common set of terms). Your earlier comment made it sound like you were using the scale, so I used it in my reply. If you don't like it, fine.

What I'm saying is that bisexual is the space between two points, not a third point.
 

Bara_no_Hime

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Sir John the Net Knight said:
Aylaine said:
Nothing should stop you from being you want in this world, or who you want to be with. ♥
A very beautiful thought, my dear. Totally incorrect, but beautiful nonetheless. The truth is that if people look beyond societal labels and other such nonsensical platitudes, you're going find more often than not that what a sole person wants is highly irrelevant. And maybe nothing should stop you from being what you want, and being with who you want. But I guarantee you, something will try. Many, many somethings.
You contradict yourself. He said "nothing should stop you"

You said "totally incorrect" and then said that someone will try to stop you, adding "and maybe nothing should stop you"

Aylaine never said that nothing would, or that it would be easy. He said should, which you agreed with. Therefore the original statement (which only ever indicated should) was correct. Nothing should stop you. Many things will try anyway, but they shouldn't.