Cheating on People
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It depends on the instinct. The polygamy instinct I discribed makes males devalue females, and therefore it should be eliminated. Also, mercy isn't really a "natural" instinct. Animals are programmed to only have the will to survive, not worry about other creatures. But since surviving is so damn easy for humans, we get to ignore normal instincts to overlook people and instead help them.D4zZ said:
I somewhat agree. I suppose I'm mostly of the nature where I'm fully aware of my glass house, as such hurling boulders doesn't usually appeal to me. Cheating is not ok; that I will agree with. But this idea that all people who have ever cheated are absolute scum is nonsense. There honestly are just some situations where NOT cheating should earn you a fucking congressional medal of honor.Haunted Serenity said:
I've been cheated on OH so many times.
And i've admittedly done it myself, but I'd like it known that as much as I don't condone cheating on either end of it.
The people I personally cheated on, really fucking deserved it.
(mainly because they were the ones that did it to me.)
it's petty revenge at best, but at the end of the day, why should I consistantly remain faithful to people who've proven themselves incapable of doing it for me?
So, yeah I've cheated, I never liked doing it, I honestly felt horrid every second of when I was doing it, but it was the only way the idiots who did it to me were gonna realise what they'd done.
Just simply breaking up with them isn't enough for a lesson to be learned.
But whilst in a committed relationship, If both parties are mutually faithful then there's no reason for it to happen and when it does I wanna give the guilty party a solid kicking.
And i've admittedly done it myself, but I'd like it known that as much as I don't condone cheating on either end of it.
The people I personally cheated on, really fucking deserved it.
(mainly because they were the ones that did it to me.)
it's petty revenge at best, but at the end of the day, why should I consistantly remain faithful to people who've proven themselves incapable of doing it for me?
So, yeah I've cheated, I never liked doing it, I honestly felt horrid every second of when I was doing it, but it was the only way the idiots who did it to me were gonna realise what they'd done.
Just simply breaking up with them isn't enough for a lesson to be learned.
But whilst in a committed relationship, If both parties are mutually faithful then there's no reason for it to happen and when it does I wanna give the guilty party a solid kicking.
Nah, he knew better. I was never the psycho kind, he knew some of my previous boyfriends and they all sang songs of praise about me. I'm actually quite understanding. I'd be upset, but going's nuts is for fools.The Dr Jack said:
It's just sex, but don't worry, Frieda Kahlo didn't get it for a long time either.
Relationships are about more than physical intimacy. Sex is not the ultimate show of affection. If you want to show affection, do it by being intellectually and emotionally available, not by being ready to fuck at the drop of a hat. Cheating is just a quest for pleasure, often without any deep meaning, so it is less important than real connection and understanding between two people.
Fucking somebody does not show you care, it shows that you think they are physically attractive.
Relationships are about more than physical intimacy. Sex is not the ultimate show of affection. If you want to show affection, do it by being intellectually and emotionally available, not by being ready to fuck at the drop of a hat. Cheating is just a quest for pleasure, often without any deep meaning, so it is less important than real connection and understanding between two people.
Fucking somebody does not show you care, it shows that you think they are physically attractive.
Yeah boulders make such unsightful cracks. I do understand how people get hurt, but if you let it control your life than all you will feel is pain.RagingScottsman said:
Totally agree with the last part though. When do i get my medals?
That's a cop out if I ever heard one!. Yes, emotions and love are irrational and complex at times, however it's not like cheaters are blind to their intentions. It's not like they are not aware of their actions and consequences. They know what they are doing but they do it anyway. To hurt someone you love and are committed to, to betray that trust for someone else..that's not being irrational, it's being an arse!.Aedes said:
Saying someone cheats because "emotions are irrational" makes no sense. If their emotions leads them to someone else then all they have to do is end the existing relationship and pursue their new interest. Why should one continue a relationship if their emotions are strongly leading them to someone else?. The whole thing is just going to end in heartbreak for someone who doesn't deserve that kind of shit.
I've been cheated on, and its awful.
When I found out, I just stopped speaking to her again. All I said during our last conversation is "Why?" and after a bullshit answer, I just said "Go away and never come back."
Never saw her again...
I have also been accused of having sex with my best friend's old girlfriend. Being accused of having sex with someone else's girlfriend when I haven't is infuriating. This girl was a controle freak, and basically trying to get my best friend to hate all of his friends. But she lied to my friend and he accused me. After 30 or so minuts he found out she lied, and lied about almost everything else she said about how my friends did bad things to her.
He dumped her ass, told her to never come by him again, and walked away.
Oh sorry I guess I didn't answer your question.
Anyway, I think people cheat because of the hardwiring in the human mind. Men have to spread their seed as much as possable to ensure the continuation of the human race. Women have to get pregnant at all costs to ensure continued existance of humanity.
Thats just my theory though, could be something else.
When I found out, I just stopped speaking to her again. All I said during our last conversation is "Why?" and after a bullshit answer, I just said "Go away and never come back."
Never saw her again...
I have also been accused of having sex with my best friend's old girlfriend. Being accused of having sex with someone else's girlfriend when I haven't is infuriating. This girl was a controle freak, and basically trying to get my best friend to hate all of his friends. But she lied to my friend and he accused me. After 30 or so minuts he found out she lied, and lied about almost everything else she said about how my friends did bad things to her.
He dumped her ass, told her to never come by him again, and walked away.
Oh sorry I guess I didn't answer your question.
Anyway, I think people cheat because of the hardwiring in the human mind. Men have to spread their seed as much as possable to ensure the continuation of the human race. Women have to get pregnant at all costs to ensure continued existance of humanity.
Thats just my theory though, could be something else.
I'll let you know when I get mine, man. I got fed up with such things and gave up on trying to earn medals, points, etc. I would rather spend my time partying and maybe find a girlfriend for the night. Were I to stumble upon the perfect missus though, she could take comfort that I've learned my lesson. Besides, why would the perfect person hold it against me that I had a fleeting moment of promiscuity?Haunted Serenity said:
Speaking as someone's who's had that opportunity in the past, you don't do it. Period. Full stop. You don't help someone do that to another human being, no matter how much you like him/her. And, not for nothing, but if you're truly "crazy" about someone, cheating isn't the right way to go. Most affairs don't end up with the cheater and mistress in a relationship. Especially speaking as a guy, you just don't do that.Aedes said:
I had a friend whose position on the issue was something akin to "if she's cheating, her boyfriend must be bad, so what does it matter to me?" Needless to say, we've not been friends in a while. My best friend's girlfriend cheated on him, and while I had plenty of anger toward the girl, the guy she cheated with doesn't get any sympathy either.
*Brushes off the holier-than-thou vibes.*
Now that that's over, I'll admit that I've both cheated and been cheated on. I'm not saying that cheating is a good thing to do, or okay, or anything like that, but it's also not a reason to burn in hell eternally or what most of you are acting like. Frankly, shit happens. If you can fight those urges, kudos to you I suppose. But if you can't, that's okay. Sure, it'll most likely hurt everyone involved, but show me someone who's never been hurt emotionally in life.
I cheated on my girlfriend twice with my ex, roughly three months and than a year into our relationship. It was hard, but we got through it. I cut my ex out of my life, and we're happier than ever, and are a month past our three year anniversary. So everyone chilling out, saying you can't talk to or look the cheater in the eyes, or saying you'd never in your life, chill out. Wait until you see where life takes you.
Now that that's over, I'll admit that I've both cheated and been cheated on. I'm not saying that cheating is a good thing to do, or okay, or anything like that, but it's also not a reason to burn in hell eternally or what most of you are acting like. Frankly, shit happens. If you can fight those urges, kudos to you I suppose. But if you can't, that's okay. Sure, it'll most likely hurt everyone involved, but show me someone who's never been hurt emotionally in life.
I cheated on my girlfriend twice with my ex, roughly three months and than a year into our relationship. It was hard, but we got through it. I cut my ex out of my life, and we're happier than ever, and are a month past our three year anniversary. So everyone chilling out, saying you can't talk to or look the cheater in the eyes, or saying you'd never in your life, chill out. Wait until you see where life takes you.
I can understand cheating, up to a point - my relationship with my girlfriend (which had been going for just over a year and a half) was based on what most teenage relationships are - looks, passion and flirting. Therefore as time went on, the passion began to feel...stale, for both of us - and there wasn't really anything else underneath it to hold the relationship together.
We ended it, but I can understand the mentality that'll find a new partner exciting and fresh - all the moreso because of the risk of getting caught. A clever (if amoral) person could have the best of both worlds - the stability and close friendship with their long-term girlfriend, and the flirting and sex with the other.
Also, many guys I know are utterly incapable of resisting an offer from a pretty face.
However, I don't agree with either situation - I think that anyone who's suitably strong-willed can avoid cheating.
We ended it, but I can understand the mentality that'll find a new partner exciting and fresh - all the moreso because of the risk of getting caught. A clever (if amoral) person could have the best of both worlds - the stability and close friendship with their long-term girlfriend, and the flirting and sex with the other.
Also, many guys I know are utterly incapable of resisting an offer from a pretty face.
However, I don't agree with either situation - I think that anyone who's suitably strong-willed can avoid cheating.
You must recognise some things here, unwashed masses. There are men who don't cheat and cheat on principle. Those who don't are cool, those who do are useless slime. But there is a third party. Some men have an absolutely INCREDIBLE sex-drive. As in, nigh insatiable. Those men are faced with the difficulty of wanting to have a jolly time with any appealing woman they see.
Some men see to this issue themselves (cough).
Some others wind up outside the relationship, not really on purpose.
I'm still waiting for science to make a pill for this. "Libido-Smasher XL! It'll tone you down like the application of a sledgehammer, but with none of the pain! signuptodayonly19easypaymentsof99.99."
Some men see to this issue themselves (cough).
Some others wind up outside the relationship, not really on purpose.
I'm still waiting for science to make a pill for this. "Libido-Smasher XL! It'll tone you down like the application of a sledgehammer, but with none of the pain! signuptodayonly19easypaymentsof99.99."
Lord, how I looooooove the self-righteous. They're the best to watch have life humble them.Lysserd said:
I dont see why people arent allowed to love, or even be attracted to, more than one person...
...my relationships have always been either open, or very short...
then again, i am the most unromantic, uncaring and unemotional person i know of...
when i see my friends with their partners... i never understand why theyre so clingy, or how they cant stand each other...
they can barely stop hugging, yet alone stop talking about each other... gets on my nerves...
then when it all goes wrong... theyre crying for 9 days... why? what did you want to happen?
you wanted to perform an outdated religious sacrament and live happily ever after? usually the answer's no...
so... by the time my generic lovey-dovey gf/bf's realise this they go onto their little speech... and it always seems to suprise people that i actually dont care... even though thats what theyre complaining about lol...
...then i get 10,000 facebook notifications from their friends telling me im horrible :\
sooooo... no... i cant see a problem with it...
id say telling someone that theyre the only person youll ever be able to love, and the only person youll ever be attracted to... is a bit... ambitious...
...my relationships have always been either open, or very short...
then again, i am the most unromantic, uncaring and unemotional person i know of...
when i see my friends with their partners... i never understand why theyre so clingy, or how they cant stand each other...
they can barely stop hugging, yet alone stop talking about each other... gets on my nerves...
then when it all goes wrong... theyre crying for 9 days... why? what did you want to happen?
you wanted to perform an outdated religious sacrament and live happily ever after? usually the answer's no...
so... by the time my generic lovey-dovey gf/bf's realise this they go onto their little speech... and it always seems to suprise people that i actually dont care... even though thats what theyre complaining about lol...
...then i get 10,000 facebook notifications from their friends telling me im horrible :\
sooooo... no... i cant see a problem with it...
id say telling someone that theyre the only person youll ever be able to love, and the only person youll ever be attracted to... is a bit... ambitious...
My first boyfriend cheated on me and I found out 3 months later. I dumped him right away. He didn't come all teary eyed sobbing because of what he had done, he hid it from me and carried on as if nothing had happened (which -from what I've heard- is what happens usually). Finding out he had cheated on me made me feel really bad, it was one of the worse moments in my entire life and even today I don't like thinking about it. He sure deserved worse than just being dumped, and 4 years later I still think he is the lowest kind of scum.Bailos said:
Also, to all those who say "cheating isn't that bad, it's an impulse, it's just sex", think of the other person: do they think like that too? Because most people don't, and they are the ones getting hurt if you do that. And good luck trying to find a partner who will be cool with it :/