Cookie Monster Steals Golden Cookie

[Chromatic Aberration]

Cookie Monster Steals Golden Cookie

Locals of the city of Hannover in Germany were baffled last week when they found one of the tastiest symbols of their town suddenly gone: the golden cookie. Standing in as a trademark for the renowed Leibniz cookies [http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/4c/Butterkeks.jpg] by the German company Bahlsen, it long stood vigil on the company building [http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/a/a4/Bahlsen_Figuren.jpg], until it was nagged by the mysterious criminal only known as the Cookie Monster who claimed responsibility [http://www.haz.de/Hannover/Fotostrecken-Hannover/Gestohlener-Bahlsenkeks-Erpresserbrief-bei-der-HAZ-eingegangen/20130129_Keks_11] in a note to the Hannover'sche Allgemeine Zeitung, a local newspaper, today.

"I have the cookie. You want it" the criminal mastermind states bluntly along with a photo of him chewing gleefully on the 20kg (44 pounds) gilded bronze sculpture. That's why, he continues, Bahlsen would want to hand out cookies to all the children in the local children's hospital and spend the one thousand euro bounty issued by the company on the animal shelter in Langehagen. Otherwise he threatens to put the precious treat "to Oscar into the trashcan".

The police remained skeptical despite the Cookie Monster's unequivocal statement of being serious. "We are investigating if this was a hoax or indeed a real claim of responsiblity" a police spokesman was quoted saying. Meanwhile, the victim remained in shock: "This sure as hell isn't a marketing-stunt by our company" a spokeswoman of Bahlsen said in an interview.

Source: The Washington Post [http://www.washingtonpost.com/business/who-stole-the-golden-cookie-police-hunt-for-german-bakers-missing-symbol/2013/01/29/d694a3dc-6a3e-11e2-9a0b-db931670f35d_story.html], every [http://www.focus.de/panorama/welt/goldener-keks-gestohlen-bahlsen-wird-vom-kruemelmonster-erpresst_aid_908329.html] single [http://www.stern.de/panorama/wahrzeichen-geklaut-bahlsen-erhaelt-erpresserbrief-vom-kruemelmonster-1962732.html] larger [http://www.spiegel.de/panorama/gestohlener-leibniz-keks-bahlsen-erpresserbrief-vom-kruemelmonster-a-880339.html] German [http://www.sueddeutsche.de/panorama/keks-diebstahl-in-hannover-erpresserbrief-vom-kruemelmonster-1.1586768] newspaper [http://www.fr-online.de/newsticker/der-keks-ist-weg---bekennerschreiben-von-kruemelmonster,11005786,21587662.html], The Hannover'sche Allgemeine [http://www.haz.de/Hannover/Aus-der-Stadt/Uebersicht/Leibniz-Keks-gegen-Spende-Polizei-prueft-versuchte-Erpressung].

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Yeah I admit, that was a bit silly. But it somehow amused me to no end today, so I felt the need to share it....but anyway:

So fellow Escapists: what made you laugh today?​

 

[Colour Scientist]

I really hope they actually start handing out cookies to get it back.

What an odd thing to do though.

 

[NightmareExpress]

At least it's for a noble cause.
If the thing is returned, I don't see much wrong in it.
Sometimes a company just needs a little kick to the teeth for them to do good things.

Anyway...I haven't laughed today.
That will probably change in an hour or two.

 

[Shinsei-J]

"This sure as hell isn't a marketing-stunt by our company" a spokeswoman of Bahlsen said in an interview.

That's exactly what they would say if it was one.
They're not lowering anyone's suspicions by saying this, probably heightening 'em if anything.

OT: This was my first laugh of the day and I thank you.

 

[PsychicTaco115]

We do not negotiate with terrorists. As of this time, the man known as the "Cookie Monster" is wanted by the UN for crimes against humanity...

OT: That's pretty cool, hopefully some good will come out of it

 

[Rawne1980]

Next week on Crime Watch ... Bert and Ernie steal pyjama's.

 

[an annoyed writer]

And now I'm reminded of that "Cookie Hood" skit they did on Sesame Street.

What made me laugh today? Well, half of bronydom exploded in rage over a major design change to one of MLP: FiM's mane characters (which I personally think is an overreaction).

Agreed. They're whinging about *GASP character development! You know, where a character goes and grows to take on new challenges and the like? Something that is widely regarded as one of the series' strengths? Sure, they're probably doing it to sell more toys, but look at it this way: the target audience is children, and what to all children do? They grow. This is something representative of that: the character going through said changes is growing up right there with them. They'll probably make changes to the affected character's personality throughout the growth and the other characters' perceptions of said character, but that's just a fact of life: people change over time, as do others' perceptions of them. This is meant to teach that lesson, if the show's basic premise hasn't changed.

And now I just realized that I'm defending a design decision in a show that I never really gave two shits about in the first place. Somehow, I find that funny in-of-itself.

 

[Ytomyth]

Hehe, it's funny enough on its own but the first German newspaper (http://www.focus.de/panorama/welt/g...d-von-kruemelmonster-erpresst_aid_908329.html) also contains a picture of the ransom note, complete with cut-out words and letters. xD

It states, among other things, that the cookies given to the children should not be "full-fat milk" (not sure what the english word for that would be), they should be chocolate, but not dark. That completed it for me.

 

[Thaluikhain]

All fun and games, but once you start negotiating with people who want to hold you to ransom, where does it end? If the Cookie Monster gets his way, next week someone else steals the thing again and makes demands. Sure, noble cause and all, but that's what PETA says.

I hope the Cookie Monster has his house raided, odd as it sounds.

 

[Kopikatsu]

Hehe, it's funny enough on its own but the first German newspaper (http://www.focus.de/panorama/welt/g...d-von-kruemelmonster-erpresst_aid_908329.html) also contains a picture of the ransom note, complete with cut-out words and letters. xD

It states, among other things, that the cookies given to the children should not be "full-fat milk" (not sure what the english word for that would be), they should be chocolate, but not dark. That completed it for me.

In English, 'full-fat milk' is called Whole Milk.