cross-dressing as punishment?
- Thread starter chinangel
- Start date
I wouldn't but that's because it wouldn't teach your kid anything. Holding a sign saying what they did wrong is a better way to do it than cross dressing. I'm more of a punishment needs to fit the crime kinda guy and cross dressing them doesn't really do anything.
This has got one of the most stupid forms of punishment around. Essentially people that use form of punishment is trying to reinforce gender roles. Essentially implying that values and traits of the opposite gender are negatives. Trying to shame your kids by making them identify with clothes of the opposite gender and have that association cast in a negative way. Girls wear pink, so if a male kid wears pink, then they are a sub male and no longer a proper human male, yeah nice parenting bub. Your kid is gonna turn out real good later. To me it's petty and mean.
Then there is other forms of stupid punishment:
Then there is other forms of stupid punishment:
I fail to see the the benefits of this? Like really, doing it to kids is stupid enough; Doing it to adults to shame them and imply they are less than the ideal form of their gender, really? i mean really?
This is part of the reason why I wouldn't do it too. It's enough on its own actually. I'd say this is child abuse in the form of bullying. You deliberately humiliate your child in public for the sake of punishment. Even if this were to be a one time thing for one day at the mall that kid would become a target for all the bullies at school afterwards. Growing up is tough enough without parents painting a target on your back to attract bullies and make it more difficult getting friends.Casual Shinji said:
I also find this incredibly disrespectful to transgenders. Transgenders face enough abuse for their choice of doing this, why alienate them more by making their choice a punishment. If I were to use transgenders as the template for punishment I could mix it up and make my son make out with a man because being gay must be a punishment too, right?
I would also be sending out a message of intolerance that I would project to my kids. Crossdressing is bad = transgenders are inferior. I would not want to teach my kids to be intolerant.
Also why do I have to buy specific clothes for punishment? Seems like a waste even though kids can usually get cheaper clothes... this isn't an important reason though...
I'm with Shinji on this one. The whole thing just screams cruel and unusual punishment.Casual Shinji said:
Honestly, I think it sends the wrong message. Or a couple of them, really.
Although, maybe if my kid were disparaging the opposite sex...
...Nah, probably not even then. Also:
Although, maybe if my kid were disparaging the opposite sex...
...Nah, probably not even then. Also:
This.Colour Scientist said:
I'm not cool with that, because that's going to stick with the kid years after the act. Mental scars are not easy to deal with.
I struggle to see how this could be implemented in a way that was constructive rather than just a vindictive or for the personal amusement of the parent.
I'm all for coming up with creative ways of punishing kids that is relevant to the thing you are punishing them for in theory (catching a kid smoking and then punishing them by chain smoking the rest of the pack for example) but I think it's very difficult for this to applied constructively.
The best punishments are unambiguous and predictable and more symbolically negative rather actively unpleasant.
I'm all for coming up with creative ways of punishing kids that is relevant to the thing you are punishing them for in theory (catching a kid smoking and then punishing them by chain smoking the rest of the pack for example) but I think it's very difficult for this to applied constructively.
The best punishments are unambiguous and predictable and more symbolically negative rather actively unpleasant.
No.
In the first place, what's wrong with crossdressing? And public humiliation is a bad way to raise your kids anyway.
I'd only do it if it directly related to the thing I was punishing them for, as a consequence. Like, if my son really wanted an expensive dress, and I' d buy it to him after he promised he would wear it and wanted it more than any other thing, only to change his mind later.
In the first place, what's wrong with crossdressing? And public humiliation is a bad way to raise your kids anyway.
I'd only do it if it directly related to the thing I was punishing them for, as a consequence. Like, if my son really wanted an expensive dress, and I' d buy it to him after he promised he would wear it and wanted it more than any other thing, only to change his mind later.
Shame is an effective tool for behavior modification, and one I would not necessarily avoid using when appropriate (particularly when dealing with a bloated ego), but the answer is still no.
I spent the majority of my life stuck in a mental shell, afraid to touch the world or let it touch me. Risking a child of mine going through a similar experience simply is not going to happen, and giving a kid a potentially traumatic experience to associate with public exposure is definitely such a risk, particularly since it will almost certainly lead to further abuse from his/her peers.
I spent the majority of my life stuck in a mental shell, afraid to touch the world or let it touch me. Risking a child of mine going through a similar experience simply is not going to happen, and giving a kid a potentially traumatic experience to associate with public exposure is definitely such a risk, particularly since it will almost certainly lead to further abuse from his/her peers.
Nothing if that is one's choice, but that is irrelevant. Changing a child's behavior is less about how the world is or at least should be than about how the child perceives it. Ideally, one should attempt to teach them not to buy into publicly held stereotypes such as traditional gender roles. But in the meantime, one might as well use them for their benefit if possible.Lieju said:
Isn't it illegal to punish children by humiliating them? is it any different than violently beating the child into submission? ofcourse it isn't. I for one would report such parents to the police, and if that failed then I would probably just get my baseball bat and show them what karma is.
Unless ofcourse the child is over the age of 16 and already fit to leave their home.
Unless ofcourse the child is over the age of 16 and already fit to leave their home.
I have my own reasons for saying no to this, but violent abuse is in no way shape or form remotely comparable to simple humiliation, even if we only compared the potential for mental scars. Hell, I suspect that the sight of you beating the crap out of their parents with a baseball bat would cause much more harm to them in the long run.Sofus said:
I am completely against public shaming as a punishment for your own children. Pretty much any kind of pyschological torture seems crueler to me than a belt ever was.chinangel said:
An open-palm spanking or enforced grounding suffices according to relative parenting practices. As a person who grew up being belted I'll say that I still have resentment for it despite me turning out well as far as not getting into trouble and contributing to society. The worst part of the belting was that I had to go bring the belt to my father. That one step was worse than anything else. So it's probably why I'm particularly against the pyschological damage side of things.
Parents who stick to grounding but don't strictly enforce it are basically breeding assholes and criminals. If you can't enforce your own grounding rules then you should stick to the ol' open palm spanking.
That is absolutely awful! For so many different reasons.chinangel said:
1) Public shaming is worse than spanking. A slap on the ass stings for a second and then goes away. A public shaming can scar someone for life.
2) Indicating that cross-dressing is a shameful act is also awful. There's nothing wrong with wearing non-standard clothes. Hell, a year ago we were celebrating the dad who not only let his son dress as a girl when he wanted to, but also wore a dress himself as an act of solidarity.
2a) The diaper thing is also a weird message to send. I find that one less offensive and more creepy.
... yeah, those are the main reasons I find this awful and upsetting.
Oh, and before anyone brings it up, when I say spankings, I mean open hand slaps on the butt. No punches, no belts, none of that shit - just the classic "it doesn't really hurt, but it's scary" kind of spanking.