I played free and I found it to be really fun, and populated. Quit because my graphics card lagged me out even on the lowest settings, but I plan to redownload it after I get a new computer. As for the community being hostile, aren't most online communities? It's just a matter of finding the right people, and I was lucky enough that within the first few weeks I got into a pretty nice crowd, and that was just from offering to party up with anyone over global chat, and then making friends with those that turned out to be cool.
(Not to mention it's the only MMORPG that I've played which had puzzles in their dungeons. I just wish they had more of those, or maybe they do and I just didn't play long enough to be exposed to them.)
One of the things I had a problem with was the tendency that your character would turn out like shit because you didn't have a build in mind. I suggest going to the forums and doing a little digging to find some good builds you can work at, and then when you get the hang of it you might go and experiment with your own.