Dad says no to COD, takes kids to real warzone

[ExtraDebit]

As a chinese saying goes: "You cannot substitute 1000 miles journey with 10000 books" (paraphrasing).

This man deserve a medal for caring enough about his children to actually take the time to do with he did. How many of you that have kids actually did something so time drastic to prove a point? And I'm not talking about going to paris or somewhere you yourself wanted to go and talking your kids with you, This man really loved his kids.

 

[Saulkar]

Honestly, this guy is a pretty cool dad. He did not put his kids in any danger and gave them context with a real life experience. It must have been pretty positive as they say they want to go back. Add onto that, the father is actively talking with people on the comment section of that article.

As a chinese saying goes: "You cannot substitute 1000 miles journey with 10000 books" (paraphrasing).

I am going to have to remember that.

 

[pha kin su pah]

good to see he taught his kids the effects of war, and consequences, and how not to differentiate between fact and fiction..

 

[ForumSafari]

Unless kids really are that stupid and can't see that what they're playing is a fantasy.

The funny thing is that it's been proven by several studies that they in fact can. With that in mind it's like someone trying to prove to you that Peter Rabbit being made into a pie would be a very bad thing, it's really redundant and just makes the father look like he's the one that has trouble telling the difference between fiction and reality.

 

[Quoth]

My Dad ranted one day whilst watching me play the Omaha beach landing act from Medal of Honour. "If you're really going to play these games you should get one life. Buy the game for £xx and when you're die that's it you're done - because that's what it was actually like".

 

[TheIceQueen]

Snipped.

But he didn't say no, mister clickbait title. He said that they could play them if they still wanted to after giving them some new perspective. I can admire the man. He wants to teach his sons about the issues, to make them understand a new angle of the world. He used it as a learning experience.

 

[BlindMaphisto]

I wonder if he will take them to hookers when they get into porn.

 

[Denamic]

I wonder if he will take them to hookers when they get into porn.

Porn actors and actresses aren't prostitutes. They don't get paid to have sex with people; they get paid to let people film it.

On topic: I'm going to assume he didn't bring them into an active warzone, but to a place that's been ravaged by war, in which case he's an amazing parent. It shows war is not a trivial thing, that middle-eastern men aren't all subhuman terrorists that are to be shot on sight, that guns aren't toys. It's instilling a sense of perspective of war they would never get from playing a game that trivialises it. If the kids take in this lesson, they might not only have more respect for realities of war, as well as cherish what they have more than they otherwise would.

 

[Batou667]

Meanwhile, in Sweden:

There's a time and a place for bringing home moral messages and opening kids eyes to the reality of the world. But for chrissakes, these are kids who wanted to play a game. They weren't asking for real guns so they could shoot real people. If he thought that the content of the game was too explicit for them - and fair enough, a responsible parent should vet the media their kids consume - then just gently explain to them that "Sorry, this is too bloody and violent for you, you can play it when you're older" and suggest a game that's more suitable. Flying them out to a warzone and shoving images of amputees and orphans (or whatever) in their face is just a grandiose way of scaring them into obedience.

"I have received messages calling me the worst parent in the world, saying that I am traumatizing my children, that I am a pompous bastard, and that I should be doused in napalm," Helgeren told The Local. "I didn't really expect such a reaction."

I don't necessarily agree with the "worst parent" or "doused in napalm" bits, but pompous bastard? That seems oddly fitting.

Did he, for the sake of even-handedness, also teach his boys about military peacekeeping, humanitarian aid, and the horrible dictators who were only eventually ousted from power at the end of a rifle? Why did he feel this "education" was so important anyway, were his privileged little kids at all likely to get involved in gun crime, or to go off to war uninformed of the dangers?

And how far does his finger-wagging "life isn't all fun and games" moralising go?

Kids want a racing game: dad forces them to watch grisly PSA on the deaths caused by street racing, and fatal Formula 1 crashes "...and if it still seems like fun, then you can play the game"

Kids want a wrestling game: dad lectures them on the dangers of steroid abuse and makes them watch documentary on all the WWE wrestlers who were killed, paralysed or otherwise injured in the ring "...and if it still seems like fun, then you can play the game"

Kids want to play Far Cry 3: Ok, but first we're going to watch "Earthlings" and you can decide whether hunting animals seems like a fun thing to do...

Geeze Louise. Look, it's heartening to see a parent - especially a father - who gives a damn about what media his kids are being exposed to and how it's affecting their upbringing. That's pretty rare. But somebody give this guy a chill pill! Let kids be kids and let childhood have some romanticism and innocence - kids grow up quickly these days and will be exposed to plenty of stuff that will erode their faith in humanity in due course. The fact that they're unaware of what the horrors of war are is a testament to how far we've come as a peaceful and civilised society; it's not a "weakness" to be despised. Let them play with make-believe swords and bows and arrows and guns, it's what kids have done for centuries. There's no need to view play and make-believe through the cynical and alarmist eyes of a too-serious adult.

Dad: you mean well, but sit the fuck down and shut the fuck up, please.

 

[Muspelheim]

Interestingly, I think there is an educational program for holocaust denialists in most Nordic countries that also involves a visit to an extermination camp. Of course, that is less about "Here is the real deal, just so you know what it is" and more about "Yes, this did happen. See for yourself."

(The ethics of that could probably be discussed, but "Nah, didn't happen" simply don't and shouldn't fly in a history class, and providing real proof instead of just a big fat F problably won't hurt)

Not that I've heard of and I live in Norway. Closest we get is the trip thats taken down to Poland to see old castles, historical sites and such(which does include recent history like WW2 museums). It's just a general trip for people around 13-16 years accompanied by parents and teachers thats done for fun. The history of the holocaust is always part of WW2 history here as well(at least when I was going to school heh).

Could be limited to Sweden only then, thought it was a pan-Nordic project, though. But I think it was limited to pupils with neo-Nazi tendencies and the like, as a sort of brief special education program. Basically as a last resort if they go "Sorry, teach, still think it's just made up, can't fool me". Of course, it's likely done away with, along with red pencils and the like. (Donald Duck-esque grumbling)

 

[GamerAddict7796]

Not sure how I feel about this, it involves a host of quite intricate moral considerations...

Therefore its time to make some lame jokes by replacing CoD with other games.

Dad says no to Assassins Creed 2, pushes kids off top of Florence Cathedral into bale of hay.
Dad says no to Forza 5, buys kids own Bugatti Veyron.
Dad says no to Aliens Colonial Marines, hires own tap-dancing xenomorph
Dad says no to Duke Nukem Forever, flings own feces at kids.
Dad says no to JRPG, teaches kids value of friendship by killing God.
Dad says...

Well you get the idea.

Dad says no to Fallout, nukes entire planet.

OT: Conflicted on this. On the one hand he's teaching them valuable lessons about the realities of war but on the other he could leave the children worried about the same thing happening to them or feeling guilt about their lives when others suffer.

 

[klaynexas3]

It just feels like no one is actually reading the article, or at least not all of it. The dad isn't punishing his kids, nor is he blaming video games for violence or drawing connections between this and that, he's trying to teach his kids about what violence can do. Games do not cause violence, but if all a kid knows about violence is from video games, movies, any form of media that simply romanticizes it, then the kid won't know that violence is a bad thing. Granted, yes, he did maybe take an extreme step in this lesson, but the point being is that parents should show their kids that violence is bad. Taking them to a city that has been affected by war does do the trick, and probably gives them a better, more caring perspective about the people that have to go through that. He's not a bad parent, just a little more over the top than others.

 

[McElroy]

I would've put the conversation on hold for a couple of years. I think ten and eleven are too young for this sort of thing. Not because traumas or something silly like that, but because they simply deserve to have that better understanding a couple of years later (with even better understanding due to those extra years). Let them be kids and let boys play war. Though of course the Dad here obviously knows his boys better than I do, but still.

 

[veloper]

Don't they have the news on television in Sweden?
Watching that would save on the expensive trip and you also get to see more ugly stuff than just the aftermath. Maybe throw in a couple war documentaries, when feeling really fanatic and active.

Going through all that trouble over a game is a little bit cuckoo. Probably harmless but just weird and terribly inefficient.

 

[SacremPyrobolum]

Not sure how I feel about this, it involves a host of quite intricate moral considerations...

Therefore its time to make some lame jokes by replacing CoD with other games.

Dad says no to Assassins Creed 2, pushes kids off top of Florence Cathedral into bale of hay.
Dad says no to Forza 5, buys kids own Bugatti Veyron.
Dad says no to Aliens Colonial Marines, hires own tap-dancing xenomorph
Dad says no to Duke Nukem Forever, flings own feces at kids.
Dad says no to JRPG, teaches kids value of friendship by killing God.
Dad says...

Well you get the idea.

We need a thread of just these.

Dad says no to Command and Conquer, enrolls kids at Westpoint instead.
Dad says no to Shogun 2: Total War, teaches them Bushido instead.
Dad says no to Surgeon Simulator, has them preform surgery instead.

It's lovely!

Would've been cheaper just to let them play a few CoD campaigns. Medal of Honour, some other spunkgargleweewee, and then Spec Ops The Line. Maybe not as effective, but at least that way, when they feel like shit, you could say "You got what you asked for."


Dad says no to Dead or Alive, just buys them porn like every other person who has ever bought Dead or Alive should've done.

Come now, Dead or Alive has a legitimately good volleyball. It's also a great gag gift!

OP: Well, at least no one can tell those kids to check their privilege anymore.

 

[Guffe]

It just feels like no one is actually reading the article, or at least not all of it.

This, after the first page there are several people quoting others telling people to re-read the article after they say stuff like "You can't take your kids to a war-zone" as if he took them behind a chest-high-wall during a live firefight.

Also: Very, very misleading and baiting title!

On Topic:

I am not sure what age the kids are, but the games are rated (pretty 50/50) either 16 or 18 (later titles being 18+) years of age to play in Finland, so I guess it's the same in Sweden.
He could just have said they have to wait, or that at least, he won't buy it to them.

Then again I guess these kinds of experiences can be good to have. At least they learned what war can do and they were somehow affected since they won't play them, at least not immediately after the trip.
I wouldn't mind traveling to a war-stricken zone. I already see a lot of shit of how people live via my job, in my country, can't even think how people have it in really bad places. Certainly would put own problems into perspective.

 

[Muspelheim]

Don't they have the news on television in Sweden?
Watching that would save on the expensive trip and you also get to see more ugly stuff than just the aftermath. Maybe throw in a couple war documentaries, when feeling really fanatic and active.

Going through all that trouble over a game is a little bit cuckoo. Probably harmless but just weird and terribly inefficient.

Yes, but the news segments are terribly brief. If you've got any real intention of watching the news, you're better off getting BBC News or some other network.

Further, it isn't about using gore and nasty things to frighten the children out of playing games. It's about showing what real war leaves behind, his point likely being that entertainment of CoD's sort usually doesn't show that side. The arrangement is more of "Well, this is how it looks like behind the scenes. Just so you know". Looking at the news or documentaries might have the same effect, but it'll be far more meaningful in person.

And hell, it's not only about the game. Getting that kind of perspective will be useful for them in general, and if nothing else, it's some clear involvement into their upbringing. If he has the means, then why not?

 

[brtt150]

Good. Some real fucking parenting going on here.

 

[ADDLibrarian]

What's wrong with being exposed to human suffering? It's more visceral and it gets the point across. Do you think it's unhealthy? I think that remaining sheltered your whole life against reality is way less healthy.

I agree that people shouldn't be sheltered- I just think there are better reasons and times to teach them about the harshness of reality, not because they want to play a video game. The lesson is a good one, but the reason for it was ridiculous. They weren't questioning the news, studying war in class, or being disrespectful to a fellow student of another nationality- they probably just wanted to play the game because their friends did. It's almost as if he went way to far just to discourage them from playing a game.

Being exposed to human suffering CAN be unhealthy, but only in the sense of being over saturated with information. I have known people, myself included, who get "bad news burnout" when there's constantly horrible things being addressed over and over and you can get very stressed/distraught. I'm NOT saying that people should ignore bad news, but take it in small doses so it can be handled properly. Take a "media break". Have a balance of ENJOYING life as well as helping to improve the world.