Darkwatch

[DavidTanis]

Dark watch is a game about VAMPIRE COWBOYS! But, dont go out and buy it just yet.

A Playstation 2 owner should certainly examine what they look for in a game before buying Darkwatch, if you enjoy the bloody first person shooters with unrealistic jump physics and guns with blades attached then Darkwatch is for you. If you enjoy hilarious dismembering of dead native Americans in between your smashing heads off zombies wielding cleavers, Darkwatch, is the game for you.

I guess what Im trying to say is as long as you arent a four year old who grew up on the teletubbies, then Darkwatch will probably be a game you'd enjoy.

It also gets the award for most annoying blue head voice since Navi. Yes, its got the annoying female who points out the obvious, however if you ever wanted to kill Cortana, Princess Rotu, Guilty Spark 343, NAVI! or any other irritating support character then there is even an ending filled with catharsis waiting just 5 game play hours (on normal) away. Even if that ending has a few logical fallacies in it (who is making the marks of evil if Im the new Vampire lord?)

Well, enjoy!

Melee each arm let it look around like "Why would you do that?" then shoot it in the chest.

 

[Fightgarr]

Not really a review. More of just a recommendation with some other comments to make it look more like a review. It would be good to say what the gameplay, game flow, story and issues are.

Also, while I assume your last line is helpful or if you've played the game, your review is more for people who haven't played the game so it just strikes me as confusing.

 

[Knight Templar]

I've played this game, or at least a game with the same name because I have no idea what you are saying.

 

[Knight Templar]

Not really a review. More of just a recommendation with some other comments to make it look more like a review. It would be good to say what the gameplay, game flow, story and issues are.

Also, while I assume your last line is helpful or if you've played the game, your review is more for people who haven't played the game so it just strikes me as confusing.

Agreed there, though I played it. It was fun. Not a distinction that's made here.

Every jump was like being on the moon, that made it worth playing all by itself.

 

[DavidTanis]

Sorry for trying not to be long winded.

 

[Novajam]

In short, your review reads out more like a clipped summary of a couple of the game's features. Or a very poor letter. It's confusing, directionless and provides minimal information. Your points aren't backed up, it's full of punctuation errors and sometimes just doesn't make sense.

"Trying not to be long winded" is no excuse for effortless writing. If you're considering doing this on a regular basis, I'd recommend that you read some reviews around hear first, along with some of the comments and see what you can learn from them. Then play your game long enough to form a defined opinion and write as if you actually give a care about the final result.

Keep trying.

 

[Tryzon]

Reviews need not be essays, but something this short just fails completely to specify much about the game. A more immediate flaw is that halfway through you stop using coherent sentences for the most part, and end up just throwing words at us. I see what you were trying to do, but it has a way to go yet.

 

[squid5580]

I enjoyed it. Had a couple cheap moments and there was some running in circles while lost but a good game nonetheless.

 

[DavidTanis]

I have three things to say, first please excuse me if I seem a bit defensive but I feel a bit attacked. That said I'd appreciate you to type in a different tone so you sound less like the elitist pseudo-journalist you seem from my limited interactions with you.

My third point is this, this wasn't meant to be a "traditional" review but rather a basic reaction to the game that I would give to any of my friends in real life should they ask me about it. If I shouldn't pollute your internet with my poor quality reactions to games then I'll gladly stop posting here.

 

[DavidTanis]

That would be a quote of Novajam but there are so many people that it applies to so I left it alone.

 

[Mr0llivand3r]

i think Darkwatch is similar to Painkiller in that there's not much to it, but it's still cool because there's nothing to it but kickass weapons and shooting things.

it's a rental, but it's still worth tasting