Dating and Strength Differences

[mecegirl]

I'm 5'4 and weigh 125 lbs. If we are talking upper body strength a guy would have to be underfed, or a child, to be significantly weaker than me So I guess the answer is no. You'd have to go to a site that caters to people who work out and ask the women that question OP. A woman who is an athlete, or a work out nut, is more likely to run into guys(ones that don't work out anyway) who are weaker than she is. It could make for an interesting read.

 

[Imperioratorex Caprae]

Absolutely not. My wife of 3 years (been with her for 10 total, married 3) is most definitely stronger than me, physically and otherwise. I'm not afraid of her, nor is it a problem for me. I don't care about the strength differential because I love her for who she is. Our relationship isn't a oneupsmanship competition. We both have strengths that complement the other's failings.

 

[Ishal]

I'm a 5'5 male. Never been in a relationship, but I've been on a few dates. One of my friends from uni was a girl on the volleyball team. She was about 6'5? Maybe a little shorter. She was also a science major, so since we were in the same class we ended up taking courses together. We'd hang out and study sometimes and she'd joke about the BDSM stuff. She was very fit, especially the lower body. Thighs like tree trunks.

I'd end up being the "sub" whether I liked it or not. At least that was joke. Truthfully I didn't mind. She was sexy as hell. Despite being pretty much an amazon, she was very pretty. But nothing ever came of it, we were just friends. She didn't want to do anything on account of our friendship. I think that was part of it, but I also thing she didn't care for shorter guys. Makes sense, most women don't prefer men shorter than them. The last thread on the subject was pretty clear on that, heh. I have to wonder though, the taller women are the harder it is for them to find men taller than them. And if they are emasculating then even more men won't want to be around with them. So maybe they'd end up with shorter men? Who knows.

 

[Ten Foot Bunny]

I was stronger and taller than the few guys I dated. Even though I look scrawny, I'm 6' tall and have a lot of natural strength. The differences didn't matter at all to me, but I couldn't tell you how the guys felt. In the end, however, I wasn't too invested in those relationships. They happened before I decided to accept the fact that I'm a lesbian, not bi.

Now, more than ever, the differences mean nothing.

 

[Johnny Impact]

Straight guy, 6'2, 250. I wouldn't mind dating a woman taller or stronger than I am. Up to a point, I actually like muscle. My size makes it a bit unlikely I'd meet a woman more than a little stronger than I am. Being able to run faster or longer would be easy, I @#$*&ing hate cardio. As for BDSM, not into it at all.

 

[renegade7]

I'm 6'2" and I must confess that I have a bit of a thing for very tall girls, especially when they're almost exactly my height or (preferably) just a little taller. Something about it just really works for me. Mostly I think it's just a scarcity factor thing. Athleticism really does it for me too.

I certainly don't have a submissive personality and the mere mention of BDSM would be grounds for a very serious re-evaluation of the trajectory of our relationship, if not immediate breakup. But I just do not understand men who get unsettled that their wife or girlfriend is more physically adept or makes more money than him, but it's so common that many of the girls I go to school with don't tell their dates that they're PhD students or where they went to undergrad for fear of looking too smart or of being too intimidating with their future career potential. From my perspective, there's the whole basic respect for another person's goals thing, the fact that I find ambition and intelligence to be appealing character traits in their own right, and the practical considerations that an athletic career-oriented Type A is more likely to be rich and less likely to get fat.

 

[jamail77]

I'm 6'2" and I must confess that I have a bit of a thing for very tall girls, especially when they're almost exactly my height or (preferably) just a little taller. Something about it just really works for me. Mostly I think it's just a scarcity factor thing. Athleticism really does it for me too.

I mean, me too, but the thing about that is I could go either way on that sort of stuff as long as she's not unhealthy.

I certainly don't have a submissive personality and the mere mention of BDSM would be grounds for a very serious re-evaluation of the trajectory of our relationship, if not immediate breakup. But I just do not understand men who get unsettled that their wife or girlfriend is more physically adept or makes more money than him, but it's so common that many of the girls I go to school with don't tell their dates that they're PhD students or where they went to undergrad for fear of looking too smart or of being too intimidating with their future career potential. From my perspective, there's the whole basic respect for another person's goals thing, the fact that I find ambition and intelligence to be appealing character traits in their own right, and the practical considerations that an athletic career-oriented Type A is more likely to be rich and less likely to get fat.

Experimentation I think is good, but I think another big reason is stigma. Like, female on male rape is very under-reported and creates shame in the male receiver. Women will pair up to have a physical strength advantage due to natural lack of strength compared to us. There's plenty of messed up stories like this 1 that may or may not be true.

Basically, a guy tried to rob a hair salon using a gun. She, a black belt in karate manages to somehow knock him out, convince everyone she'd call the cops, drag him to the basement, tie him up to a radiator with a fucking hair drier cord she ripped off, then rapes him for 3 days straight and keeps him full by feeding him nothing but viagra and to keep him going I suppose. Then, she gives him some money as compensation I guess, buys him jeans, and tells him to get out of her sight. When the cops confronted her she argued he had it coming. They both got jail. I think she deserves more. He just tried to rob, She fucking raped him. That's a lot of stigma and I imagine some women know that and wonder how their partner will react to knowing TMI about them.

 

[Jux]

Physical strength doesn't really factor into the bdsm (or more broadly, kink) lifestyle. Submissiveness is more an attitude taken than a state determined by relative strength. With that out of the way, I wouldn't have an issue with dating a woman stronger or more fit than me. I'm pretty fit now, but I focus more on long distance running and biking, I can't remember the last time I did a benchpress with free weights.

 

[jamail77]

Physical strength doesn't really factor into the bdsm (or more broadly, kink) lifestyle. Submissiveness is more an attitude taken than a state determined by relative strength. With that out of the way, I wouldn't have an issue with dating a woman stronger or more fit than me. I'm pretty fit now, but I focus more on long distance running and biking, I can't remember the last time I did a benchpress with free weights.

Well, based on that do you think most women could manage to wrestle scissor you successfully? My sister prob could but that is a whole other can of worms (older and works that out more than i do as far as I know)

 

[Jux]

Well, based on that do you think most women could manage to wrestle scissor you successfully? My sister prob could but that is a whole other can of worms (older and works that out more than i do as far as I know)

I have no idea what that even is. There are a few problems here. First, wrestling matches aren't just about strength. Now you're introducing power and experience in a specific task into the equation. Second, you're throwing out incredibly arbitrary metrics. You could argue that the 110 pound lady that can hold a scorpion pose is 'stronger' than the guy that benches 300 lbs but can't even get in that position if we limit and define 'strength' to 'who can hold his pose longer'.

 

[jamail77]

snip

Well, I know wrestling is largely about knowing how to throw your weight around and take advantage of your opponents weight. I'm talking about wrestling with legs man. Here:

 

[jamail77]

I'd end up being the "sub" whether I liked it or not. At least that was joke. Truthfully I didn't mind. She was sexy as hell. Despite being pretty much an amazon, she was very pretty. But nothing ever came of it, we were just friends. She didn't want to do anything on account of our friendship. I think that was part of it, but I also thing she didn't care for shorter guys. Makes sense, most women don't prefer men shorter than them. The last thread on the subject was pretty clear on that, heh. I have to wonder though, the taller women are the harder it is for them to find men taller than them. And if they are emasculating then even more men won't want to be around with them. So maybe they'd end up with shorter men? Who knows.

Well, that does often happen. There's a picture somewhere of a very tall African American woman who clearly works out with a short, midget size bodybuilder white guy. Looks kind of funny honestly. Anyway, I'm kind of curious about whether you liked it or not. Were there times where you didn't like it? Because that would make it dangerously close to rape.

 

[Jux]

Well, I know wrestling is largely about knowing how to throw your weight around and take advantage of your opponents weight. I'm talking about wrestling with legs man. Here:

Youtube is blocked on this network, so I can't watch whatever that is. All of this seems really weird though. This thread wasn't inspired by some kind of fetish porn was it?

 

[Ishal]

I'd end up being the "sub" whether I liked it or not. At least that was joke. Truthfully I didn't mind. She was sexy as hell. Despite being pretty much an amazon, she was very pretty. But nothing ever came of it, we were just friends. She didn't want to do anything on account of our friendship. I think that was part of it, but I also thing she didn't care for shorter guys. Makes sense, most women don't prefer men shorter than them. The last thread on the subject was pretty clear on that, heh. I have to wonder though, the taller women are the harder it is for them to find men taller than them. And if they are emasculating then even more men won't want to be around with them. So maybe they'd end up with shorter men? Who knows.

Well, that does often happen. There's a picture somewhere of a very tall African American woman who clearly works out with a short, midget size bodybuilder white guy. Looks kind of funny honestly. Anyway, I'm kind of curious about whether you liked it or not. Were there times where you didn't like it? Because that would make it dangerously close to rape.

Well, she was joking. As i said, she wasn't interested. It was more just a play on our noticeable size difference. She was a very proper catholic girl. BDSM was something of a forbidden fruit for her, at least that's how I interpreted it. Putting aside the jokes, she wasn't the type of be a dom anyway. She was too nice, and had a very go-with-the-flow demeanor. Though I suppose there could have been another side of her that I didn't know.

We'd work out together often. Being in the same classes for our majors meant we'd have overlapping free time. She'd call me a hobbit, and I'd call her an amazon. She had a great sense of humor. But we also confided in each other. You tend to do that when you spend hours studying material and being around a person. I told her that being shorter than most is indeed a confidence issue, and it means I'm looking over my shoulder when I'm alone. Despite being trained to defend myself, it's still something you can't ignore. Then there's the whole deal where most women don't even look at short guys. In turn, she told me that she didn't always have her, shall we say, ample figure. That she was always bigger than the other girls and would be called "ogre" and all sorts of other nasty things. She grew into her beautiful traits later.

As for whether I'd like it if I was a sub? I dunno. Probably not. BDSM is something I'm content to relegate to fantasy and looking at from afar. Though, if something would have come of that relationship. Yeah, I'd have liked that. Oh well.

 

[Amaror]

However, if I had a nickel for every time I have been called shallow, sexist, racist, transphobic, entitled and / or cis-normative scum (and even been physically assaulted, like pushed, that kind of stuff)for my choice, I could probably...well, eat at a fairly expensive restaurant at least.

Hmmm, seems silly that many people would be that offended by that. Might i aks in what kind of situation this happened? Just mentioning what you like? Saying he's not your type to a weaker guy? Or telling him to get lost, while insulting him about his strength. I can understand the reaction if it's the last one.

 

[Kathinka]

However, if I had a nickel for every time I have been called shallow, sexist, racist, transphobic, entitled and / or cis-normative scum (and even been physically assaulted, like pushed, that kind of stuff)for my choice, I could probably...well, eat at a fairly expensive restaurant at least.

Hmmm, seems silly that many people would be that offended by that. Might i aks in what kind of situation this happened? Just mentioning what you like? Saying he's not your type to a weaker guy? Or telling him to get lost, while insulting him about his strength. I can understand the reaction if it's the last one.

By observers or the guy in question. Mostly happened from bystanders.
Of course I will not insult people, after all, just because they are not to my taste it doesn't mean that they aren't possibly an amazing human being. I really don't go into detail about why I turn a guy down, I feel like I shouldn't need to explain myself, and nothing but hurt feelings could come out of it.
If it's someone I knew before they asked me out and they inquire and absolutely insist, I'll tell them honestly, but obviously trying to package the whole thing as nice as I can, and staying as vague as I can get away with.

 

[jamail77]

Youtube is blocked on this network, so I can't watch whatever that is. All of this seems really weird though. This thread wasn't inspired by some kind of fetish porn was it?

Kind of? I'm still unsure if I even like what I said in the OP/OT. When did they start blocking Youtube? The last time I was here they definitely didn't. And, why? Lol, and I think about applying for a job for this website *rolls eyes at silly business decisions*

 

[kurokotetsu]

Women, have you ever dated a guy who was weaker than you or just clearly less physically fit? How was the experience? Did you participate in BDSM? Did he not seem comfortable that you were more physically active or genetically stronger? Did he get turned on?

Men, vice versa. All the same questions, just reversed. Men tend to be uncomfortable when their partners are stronger.

This is mostly out of curiosity. I think I may have submissive tendencies/leaning I guess.

Well, I'm a Dom (and a very sadistic one at tht) so I can take a different approach to the question in that I have BDSM experience. ANd physical strangth is not a fundamental component. I'm a rather short and never hit the Gym (although I'm not that weak) and I can still make MY sub cry, even when she is about an inch taller (althogh physically weaker). She has a lot of experience and has seen several very fit, tall and strong men be submissive to weaker women. But being stronger than her allows me to better control her and restrain her if she tries to moveaway form the punishment. SO I like it this way, being stronger than her as a DOm, but I wouldn't say it is essential nor an indicative of what role you play, even whe it is a benefit and a good point to have.

Personally I do like being stronger than my sub and have the physical strength to restrain and control her.

 

[WouldYouKindly]

I'm a stocky sort, so I imagine through a combination of being in better shape and having the right leverage a tallish woman could overpower me.

That doesn't make me feel anything really. Not a turn on, not a turn off. I prefer shorter women but nothing really more than that.

 

[Jux]

Youtube is blocked on this network, so I can't watch whatever that is. All of this seems really weird though. This thread wasn't inspired by some kind of fetish porn was it?

Kind of? I'm still unsure if I even like what I said in the OP/OT. When did they start blocking Youtube? The last time I was here they definitely didn't. And, why? Lol, and I think about applying for a job for this website *rolls eyes at silly business decisions*

No, not this website. The network I'm currently on (that is to say, at work).