Kinda depressed that I gotta wait til next week to see this because Im cursed and cant go see a movie without being seated behind somebody literally dying or giving birth in the seat behind me.
Discuss and Rate the Last Film You Watched
- Thread starter Th3Ch33s3Cak3
- Start date
Dude I shit you not I went to knives out with my parents and there was someone on a literal iron lung behind us. I spent two hours listening to someone manage mucus. I have the worst fucking luck going to theaters. I actually built a 7.1 channel theater in my home, not because Im fancy but just so I can watch a movie in fucking peace.
My favorite event was when I went to T3 and someone brought a literal newborn baby into the theater who screamed for ten minutes before ushers kicked them out.
Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3 - 10/10
I laughed, I wept, I cheered. I am Groot.
I laughed, I wept, I cheered. I am Groot.
Stumbled across an old claymation curiosity, lovingly crafted but also surprisingly disturbing in moments - The Adventures of Mark Twain (1985) - Or more specifically, The Mysterious Stranger section for those not wanting the whole film which is apparently free to watch on YouTube!
OI! That's not meant to happen! Fine if that's how they want it...decoupled link to avoid annoying auto-imbed: https://www. youtube.com/watch?v=UsBEO06pfRc
Or?
(THC does intensify the journey somewhat I must admit)
Whole film...
OI! That's not meant to happen! Fine if that's how they want it...decoupled link to avoid annoying auto-imbed: https://www. youtube.com/watch?v=UsBEO06pfRc
Or?
(THC does intensify the journey somewhat I must admit)
Whole film...
We skipped IMAX for Avatar 2 because the regular theaters had new recliners with wider spacing, and when I ordered tickets I was able to get dead center seating. There were a lot of openings left too, but when we actually got there and sat down, it wasn’t five minutes before Pestilence sat down two seats over.
If he didn’t have COVID it was something similar, because he even left twice on his own. When he sat back down the snot box was still full, to the point I audibly said in his direction, “OMG are you kidding me?”
It was well over half an hour into the movie before it finally subsided, but damned if I wasn’t two shakes of a lamb’s tail from going over there and just flat out saying dude you shouldn’t even be here if you’re that sick. The front desk is good about giving refunds or rain checks for this kinda shit.
Double Indemnity
Great stuff. Only way you can ask for a better film noir based on a James M. Cain book and with Raymond Chandler himself writing the script is if Hammett was holding the boom mic. Fred MacMurray as the hungry but gullible narrator spilling the beans while clutching a gunshot wound. Barbara Stanwyck as the earthy femme fatale with the unhinged stare. Venetian blinds casting horizontal prison-bar shadows in every location. Everyone's sleazy but the thrill of the perfect crime is just too alluring and you want them to pull it off. The Coens took so much from this movie - not just the obvious film noir riffs (Blood Simple, The Man Who Wasn't There) but their smart-isn't-enough philosophy, pessimistic outlook, ironic twists and long-suffering protagonists are so deeply rooted in this genre, you see a little of this movie in almost everything they do.
Great stuff. Only way you can ask for a better film noir based on a James M. Cain book and with Raymond Chandler himself writing the script is if Hammett was holding the boom mic. Fred MacMurray as the hungry but gullible narrator spilling the beans while clutching a gunshot wound. Barbara Stanwyck as the earthy femme fatale with the unhinged stare. Venetian blinds casting horizontal prison-bar shadows in every location. Everyone's sleazy but the thrill of the perfect crime is just too alluring and you want them to pull it off. The Coens took so much from this movie - not just the obvious film noir riffs (Blood Simple, The Man Who Wasn't There) but their smart-isn't-enough philosophy, pessimistic outlook, ironic twists and long-suffering protagonists are so deeply rooted in this genre, you see a little of this movie in almost everything they do.
Oh yeah, that clip gets put around the net, always meant to watch the whole film at some point.
Creed III
Meh/10
This film was originally rumored to release at 2h43min. The actual theatrical cut was 1h57min with credits. I can't help but feel like theres a distinct chunk of the movie thats missing which then caused me great annoyance. There's very little "meat" to the movie. It's been out for a while, but I can't really talk about it without spoiling the overall frame. As shown in the trailers, Adonis friend from foster care comes out of prison with a chip on his shoulder, aiming to beat Adonis both mentally and physically.
The inciting incident is that as teens, they run into a foster case orderly who abused them, Adonis starts beating the guy up, theres a scuffle, the antagonist damian, pulls and gun, cops show up and he goes to prison.
I wouldn't call this a gripe, but they take great pains to make it clear they weren't sexually abused and the references to abuse are very limited, but it's enough for him to try and murder this guy. This is a manly man movie, that kind of thing doesn't happen. but there's not a doubt in my mind that it was in the original script.
Damian gets 18 years for brandishing the gun, while Adonis flees the scene. I think the logic they came up with is that Damien had priors, but on the surface it comes off as odd. Should have been murder or manslaughter. Very minor gripe.
Anyhoo Damian shows up, befriends Adonis, and then manipulates events (evil leg breaker stuff) so that he's immediately given a fight with the WBC champion, Adonis protégé. Directly out of prison, 18 years. Before the movie came out, I was confident they would say he's been boxing in prison, there is a competitive boxing organization, that's how Tyson started. Nope, nothing.
The blink and you miss it logic is that Apollo did the same for Rocky. That not actually true, Rocky was already fighting, they exhausted all options and it was meant as a kind of hype joke. This is pretty unsound logic, It would be difficult, he'd have to get a boxing license, it's a very complicated process. More on that later.
The fight goes as expected *pikachu face*, Damien "cheats" and maims his opponent and wins the title. Damian's cheating is arguable, some of it was perfectly legal and the film seems unaware of boxing rules, others are things you should expect and the fighter should have been more prepared considering he's the WBC champ.
The movie at this point sorta rushes into a Damian & Apollo revenge fight. This is the part of the film that, bias aside, I think is missing that needed 30-40 minutes. Theres an odd clue because in one fight Damian goes from being fresh out of prison and in poverty to being fabulously wealthy. Thats not how it works even in these kinds of fights. It does happen, but the way they do it, the small timer gets very little like maybe $10K-$50k, and even that is eaten up by fees. Not a small amount of change, but theres no world where he's suddenly a millionaire.
What I would have liked to have seen is A. Damian has one or two small fights, does well and then guilts/goads Adonis into giving him a shot. B. A Montage of Damian proving himself after getting the WBC title and making a big deal of trouncing all of Adonis former opponents. Calling Adonis out as a coward and a fraud. Theres a part in the trailer where Damian says "I'm coming for everything". That never actually happens here. By that I mean, we're missing the montage of Damian taking about Adonis legacy. He just talks shit and they end up fighting.
It's a weird movie. There's a solid amount of heart to the film and I'd kind of argue its the only one of Creed films where I felt like Creed becomes a tad more complex as a character. I would have liked more time spent on the build up to them fighting. I would have also preferred Damian be less scuzzy. I think him being a cheater undercut the weight of the conflict, without it Adonis is more at fault for abandoning him at the crime scene and never checking up on him in prison. I'm not saying Adonis should be the villain I just think the film would be more interesting if there is no clear villain.
This is meant to close out the films, at least with him as the main character. Overall Creed has always been a let down for me. I never quite gelled with his motivations. Keep in mind he starts out the first film as a successful fund manager and decides to box because he has anger issues. Rocky fights because he's at a dead end, living in poverty. In Creed II he fights the son of the guy that killed his dad. Some of it works but it ends up being more of a send off to Rocky than really about Adonis. This film is the first where I felt like the right intent was here, but I think it just needed more meat to it, better writing. Throughout this trilogy I never quite felt much empathy with Adonis. Shame really.
Meh/10
This film was originally rumored to release at 2h43min. The actual theatrical cut was 1h57min with credits. I can't help but feel like theres a distinct chunk of the movie thats missing which then caused me great annoyance. There's very little "meat" to the movie. It's been out for a while, but I can't really talk about it without spoiling the overall frame. As shown in the trailers, Adonis friend from foster care comes out of prison with a chip on his shoulder, aiming to beat Adonis both mentally and physically.
The inciting incident is that as teens, they run into a foster case orderly who abused them, Adonis starts beating the guy up, theres a scuffle, the antagonist damian, pulls and gun, cops show up and he goes to prison.
I wouldn't call this a gripe, but they take great pains to make it clear they weren't sexually abused and the references to abuse are very limited, but it's enough for him to try and murder this guy. This is a manly man movie, that kind of thing doesn't happen. but there's not a doubt in my mind that it was in the original script.
Damian gets 18 years for brandishing the gun, while Adonis flees the scene. I think the logic they came up with is that Damien had priors, but on the surface it comes off as odd. Should have been murder or manslaughter. Very minor gripe.
Anyhoo Damian shows up, befriends Adonis, and then manipulates events (evil leg breaker stuff) so that he's immediately given a fight with the WBC champion, Adonis protégé. Directly out of prison, 18 years. Before the movie came out, I was confident they would say he's been boxing in prison, there is a competitive boxing organization, that's how Tyson started. Nope, nothing.
The blink and you miss it logic is that Apollo did the same for Rocky. That not actually true, Rocky was already fighting, they exhausted all options and it was meant as a kind of hype joke. This is pretty unsound logic, It would be difficult, he'd have to get a boxing license, it's a very complicated process. More on that later.
The fight goes as expected *pikachu face*, Damien "cheats" and maims his opponent and wins the title. Damian's cheating is arguable, some of it was perfectly legal and the film seems unaware of boxing rules, others are things you should expect and the fighter should have been more prepared considering he's the WBC champ.
The movie at this point sorta rushes into a Damian & Apollo revenge fight. This is the part of the film that, bias aside, I think is missing that needed 30-40 minutes. Theres an odd clue because in one fight Damian goes from being fresh out of prison and in poverty to being fabulously wealthy. Thats not how it works even in these kinds of fights. It does happen, but the way they do it, the small timer gets very little like maybe $10K-$50k, and even that is eaten up by fees. Not a small amount of change, but theres no world where he's suddenly a millionaire.
What I would have liked to have seen is A. Damian has one or two small fights, does well and then guilts/goads Adonis into giving him a shot. B. A Montage of Damian proving himself after getting the WBC title and making a big deal of trouncing all of Adonis former opponents. Calling Adonis out as a coward and a fraud. Theres a part in the trailer where Damian says "I'm coming for everything". That never actually happens here. By that I mean, we're missing the montage of Damian taking about Adonis legacy. He just talks shit and they end up fighting.
It's a weird movie. There's a solid amount of heart to the film and I'd kind of argue its the only one of Creed films where I felt like Creed becomes a tad more complex as a character. I would have liked more time spent on the build up to them fighting. I would have also preferred Damian be less scuzzy. I think him being a cheater undercut the weight of the conflict, without it Adonis is more at fault for abandoning him at the crime scene and never checking up on him in prison. I'm not saying Adonis should be the villain I just think the film would be more interesting if there is no clear villain.
This is meant to close out the films, at least with him as the main character. Overall Creed has always been a let down for me. I never quite gelled with his motivations. Keep in mind he starts out the first film as a successful fund manager and decides to box because he has anger issues. Rocky fights because he's at a dead end, living in poverty. In Creed II he fights the son of the guy that killed his dad. Some of it works but it ends up being more of a send off to Rocky than really about Adonis. This film is the first where I felt like the right intent was here, but I think it just needed more meat to it, better writing. Throughout this trilogy I never quite felt much empathy with Adonis. Shame really.
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The Prestige (2006)
Pretty good, warrants a rewatch of particular scenes mostly where the ambiguity of whether it's Borden or his twin is concerned. Other than that, David Bowie as Nikola Tesla was genius casting, his part was great, short though it was. Not sure how I feel about removing the framing device from the book, but for duration, probably a necessary sacrifice.
Pretty good, warrants a rewatch of particular scenes mostly where the ambiguity of whether it's Borden or his twin is concerned. Other than that, David Bowie as Nikola Tesla was genius casting, his part was great, short though it was. Not sure how I feel about removing the framing device from the book, but for duration, probably a necessary sacrifice.
Absent
And twice is the only way to live.
- Jan 25, 2023
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It's a film I really disliked for its ending's twist, which redefines not only the whole story but also its genre, the "rules" of the story. I really don't like when my mind accompanies a tale with speculations and assumptions based on its genre/setting (its boudaries of possibilities) only to learn at the end that it was futile because its natural laws were completely different.
Incidentally, it's also why I don't like "Sherlock Holmes versus Chtulhu" concepts. Shifting from materialistic sleuthing (the holmesian "exclude the impossible") to lovecraftian madness, or magical scifi flying saucers, or draculas, or any other "nothing is impossible lol" harrypottery, feels like a carpet pulled under the very point and premise of a sherlock holmes sleuthing ("Therefore Sir Waffledope couldn't have been in this room at that hour. Unless he phased through the wall or travelled in time or turned into a bat or walked through the magical mirror or...").
To the (extended) "plot twist it was all a dream" category with that.
Renfield
5/10 I guess?
There's nothing in the film you didn't see in the trailers. It's exactly the movie you were expecting. A rather milquetoast horror comedy about Renfield not wanting to be Draculas servant anymore elevated at moments by Nicholas Cage giving 150% as is his norm these days. What you think the movie is about and how it plays out is how it plays out. Touch your forehead and imagine it, there thats the movie. It has some reasonably funny moments and then ends. There's a literal fountain of gore, which is quaint early on but starts to feel like videogame CGI by the end of it and well, you already saw all that in the trailers. Oh Awkafina is playing a straight man this time, no zanny cartoon stuff, shes mostly doing a pleasant job of reacting to all the craziness. She's neither funny nor annoying.
I have nothing bad or good to say about this movie. Its like listening to one of those geoplanet talks in the background while you're washing dishes. If you forget it's out thats ok, you didn't miss anything. I would have really liked a real movie with Nicholas Cage take on Dracula. He was cool. Really just comes down to a drab script.
5/10 I guess?
There's nothing in the film you didn't see in the trailers. It's exactly the movie you were expecting. A rather milquetoast horror comedy about Renfield not wanting to be Draculas servant anymore elevated at moments by Nicholas Cage giving 150% as is his norm these days. What you think the movie is about and how it plays out is how it plays out. Touch your forehead and imagine it, there thats the movie. It has some reasonably funny moments and then ends. There's a literal fountain of gore, which is quaint early on but starts to feel like videogame CGI by the end of it and well, you already saw all that in the trailers. Oh Awkafina is playing a straight man this time, no zanny cartoon stuff, shes mostly doing a pleasant job of reacting to all the craziness. She's neither funny nor annoying.
I have nothing bad or good to say about this movie. Its like listening to one of those geoplanet talks in the background while you're washing dishes. If you forget it's out thats ok, you didn't miss anything. I would have really liked a real movie with Nicholas Cage take on Dracula. He was cool. Really just comes down to a drab script.
Nor trying to act like stereotypical "black" person. She can still fuck off, and has no one to blame but herself or what she admitted on social media. Another celebrity using black culture and abandoning in it or dropping it at the slide escape. If they don't bring her back for the next Shang-Chi movie, I'm not going to cry about it.
The Lord of the Rings: The Two Towers, special extended edition in theaters, 9/10
The second of the LOTR screenings I'm attending this month. Having seen this movie in theaters previously in its theatrical cut it was interesting to compare the differences. While the extended edition is undoubtedly the superior of the two (the theatrical is like a 7, 8 if I'm being generous), there are problems with this part of the saga that are simply insurmountable for the medium of film. The pacing, while better than in the theatrical, still flags pretty wildly: long stretches of one storyline advance with no screentime for the others. Éomer is given quite a lot of characterization at the start, and then disappears for basically the rest of the movie. There are some pretty damn clunky exposition scenes, but I don't know if any other method would be possible with this runtime for a story with this many locations, names and moving parts. It's really backloaded with its action too. I remember the warg attack scene catching a fair bit of flak back in the day, but without it there would basically be only Helm's Deep for an action setpiece in this film, and the rest of it would be lots and lots of walking, riding and talking. And Gimli just gets done dirty by being reduced to mostly the comic relief. It's still the weakest part of the series by a mile.
Which of course means that by any other metric it's still sublime. It has one of the greatest cold opens to a movie ever, and the shot of the Balrog falling into the massive underground cavern is something I wish I could frame and put up on a wall. Due to its heavy focus on the effects of warfare on civilians and people gone before their time it feels shockingly timely and relevant thematically. I really feel Bernard Hill's acting flew under the radar in this trilogy. He gives such a powerful, Shakespearean performance to a complex and interesting character that he deserves way more credit. There are still few battle sequences that convey scale and numbers in the way Helm's Deep does. But as always, the sound is what truly separates the theater experience from watching it at home. The booms, roars, snarls, and groans convey such a sense of weight and physicality that you feel every weapon hit, snap and clang.
As a final note, I picked up on three new nitpicks this time:
The second of the LOTR screenings I'm attending this month. Having seen this movie in theaters previously in its theatrical cut it was interesting to compare the differences. While the extended edition is undoubtedly the superior of the two (the theatrical is like a 7, 8 if I'm being generous), there are problems with this part of the saga that are simply insurmountable for the medium of film. The pacing, while better than in the theatrical, still flags pretty wildly: long stretches of one storyline advance with no screentime for the others. Éomer is given quite a lot of characterization at the start, and then disappears for basically the rest of the movie. There are some pretty damn clunky exposition scenes, but I don't know if any other method would be possible with this runtime for a story with this many locations, names and moving parts. It's really backloaded with its action too. I remember the warg attack scene catching a fair bit of flak back in the day, but without it there would basically be only Helm's Deep for an action setpiece in this film, and the rest of it would be lots and lots of walking, riding and talking. And Gimli just gets done dirty by being reduced to mostly the comic relief. It's still the weakest part of the series by a mile.
Which of course means that by any other metric it's still sublime. It has one of the greatest cold opens to a movie ever, and the shot of the Balrog falling into the massive underground cavern is something I wish I could frame and put up on a wall. Due to its heavy focus on the effects of warfare on civilians and people gone before their time it feels shockingly timely and relevant thematically. I really feel Bernard Hill's acting flew under the radar in this trilogy. He gives such a powerful, Shakespearean performance to a complex and interesting character that he deserves way more credit. There are still few battle sequences that convey scale and numbers in the way Helm's Deep does. But as always, the sound is what truly separates the theater experience from watching it at home. The booms, roars, snarls, and groans convey such a sense of weight and physicality that you feel every weapon hit, snap and clang.
As a final note, I picked up on three new nitpicks this time:
- The legendary meme line "They're taking the hobbits to Isengard" makes zero sense geographically. The full line goes "The uruks turn northeast. They're taking the hobbits to Isengard!" The only way the uruks could be approaching Isengard by turning northeast would be if they were coming from literally the opposite direction they were coming from. If someone can make sense of it for me feel free to, because considering PJ's otherwise stellar dedication to geographical accuracy in the story it's just baffling that such a mistake would be present in the film.
- In the Black Gate scene when the gate opens, the orcs on top of it are really badly green screened in. You can see some orcs floating in midair, or the gate gliding under their feet. it's not something you pick up on unless you're looking, but it's wildly inferior compared to the rest of the trilogy.
- Aragorn makes two pretty fucking stupid decisions in the movie: First, letting Grima go. I get that he's noble and all, but clearly the information Grima has ends up being the reason for much more deaths. Aragorn coulda just thrown him in chains, it's not like there was no other choice besides killing him on the spot. Though I guess you could make the argument that Grima's talks were just for the audience, and Saruman already knows the things he's talking about. It'd be kind of wild if Saruman had lived for probably centuries near Rohan, and never bothered to learn its strategic locations or at least gather info on them.
The other dumb decision comes in the battle of Helm's Deep when he orders the elves to charge head first into the swarm of Uruk-Hai pouring in from the breach. Like dude, you're almost literally shooting fish in a barrel: You've got like a battalion of the finest archers in the world, with the enemy coming in from an exposed chokepoint with a direct line of fire and zero cover to hide behind. I get that it's for dramatic purposes and all, but the RTS player in me still goes "WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" every time I see it.
Also, he probably didn't just start making the black powder right after Grima told him about the drain in the wall. We also see a later scene that shows his flock of crows circling Helm's Deep, which indicates he sees what's going on there. So yeah, Grima was pretty much just expositing for the audience.
You still don't let the enemy informant go. In the extended edition, IIRC, he tells Saruman about Aragorn, and Saruman didn't know about him beforehand. Not the most useful of information, but still.
During the Persians wars Themistocles called for all Athenian ostracised to be returned, nominally because they wanted everyone to help fight, but in reality to stop them talking to the Persians.
During the Persians wars Themistocles called for all Athenian ostracised to be returned, nominally because they wanted everyone to help fight, but in reality to stop them talking to the Persians.
Its been a long time since I read the Two Towers, but did Aragorn council Theoden to let him go in that? Cos I can't imagine him escaping from any dungeon the Rohirrem elected to toss him into. And don't quote me but doesn't Grima also kill Saruman in the novel during the scourging of the shire?
Yeah, it's very overtly trying to show Aragorn as the bigger man and super noble. As if we needed to be made aware of that by this point. It's also weird how the only two choices were kill Grima or let him go, when they could've just jailed him. I can't remember how this went in the books, but then the second movie made some incredibly weird character shifts from the book, like freaking Faramir.
The Tolkein films battle scenes are remarkably shit, from the perspective of anyone wondering how armies actually fought in reality. All overblown spectacle, no sense.
Like that scene from The Hobbit where the Dwarves form a shieldwall against the onrushing goblins. So far so good (even if it's a slightly silly shieldwall). Then the elves just... jump over them to engage the goblins first. Way to waste the fucking shieldwall, knobheads. Firstly, you've now got a load of Dwarves basically wasted doing nothing, secondly if the fight goes badly for the elves, they'll be pushed back against their own troops and either die or the disrupt the shieldwall so they can retreat through. It's just monumentally stupid.
Although of course it also represents the fact that the Peter Jackson movies present elves as awesome, dashing and heroic, and the dwarves vary between dull and comic relief - the latter because getting laughed at is what short people are for, amirite?
Although frankly, as far as an utterly shit on-screen battle strategy goes, I'm not sure anything beats the Battle of Winterfell from GoT, where they managed to do literally everything wrong.
The Hobbit films were just not very good, though.
But yeah, when The Two Towers first came out, lots of people didn't like the second half, because of the ott Helm's Deep battles. Fortunately, the Hobbit films came out and people stopped caring about flaws in LotR. Then Rings of Power came out, and people stopped caring about flaws in the Hobbit films. When we get the grityt teen version of Silmarillion on Ice, I guess people will like Rings of Power more.
But yeah, when The Two Towers first came out, lots of people didn't like the second half, because of the ott Helm's Deep battles. Fortunately, the Hobbit films came out and people stopped caring about flaws in LotR. Then Rings of Power came out, and people stopped caring about flaws in the Hobbit films. When we get the grityt teen version of Silmarillion on Ice, I guess people will like Rings of Power more.